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 Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 2:08 pm
Summary: training day-So you joined the black hats right? You're so excited that you'll meet the black hat and have a great old time being a thief and doing the Robin hood thing....well you're wrong! In order to even see the brim of the black hat's black hat you gotta go through me, Sir Robin of Loxley IV. Welcome to the group, put these tights on and meet me for training in an hour. Now with a theme song! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9DpC6x75s8
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 2:34 pm
Ch.1
I go by many names...
The good thief, Sir Robin, Savor of Maid Marien IV, Mr. of Loxley, Rickashempra, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Big Stinky Ugly Baby Eating O'Brian.............................you better just call me Sir Robin of Loxley the Fourth or IV if you like Romen Numerals. Anyway I was excited today. The big black hat said he got some new recruits today and I get to train them! Ah yes this is the day I think to myself as I blow dry my nice redish brown hair. I put on my good tights and my hat with the obnoxiously large feather in it and get to work.
I go into the tunnel with anticipation. Ooo....I can feel it in my bones that today will rule! They'll all be like 'Oh Mr. of Loxley what would we have done without you?'
And I'll say, 'You would of died that's what, but not today. No because I trained you, Sir Robin of-'
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
A child that fell from the stands interrupted my thoughts. "Uh..." I kicked him to see if he was alive. I walked over him and looked at the old training arena in horror. The kids were rolling around and fighting and shouting and just........proving to me that my plain was ruined. "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" After I screamed the new recruits must of thought I called them to attention or something because they all stopped what ever they were doing and lined up in a straight line. "Oh....oh good. Welcome to the black hats. I am Sir Robin of Loxley the Fourth. You may call me Mr. of Loxley."
"Yes sir Mr. of Loxically sir!"
"Uhhh...yeah, whatever." I began to pace looking to see if I could find anyone of Black Hat material. Finally I came across a boy with dirty blond hair and looked about 15 or so. "You, what is your name?"
"Alowishous Peter Henry Cherio Ulises Taliban Constantinople Erick Jerry Gerick Zaceriah Smith."
I stood there eyes widened, "Wow....uhhh....what are you training for?"
"Scout."
"Oh good, that's your name for now."
"But sir-"
"Ap, ap, ap. No Questions until training starts. Now all of you. Take these pair of training tights and go put them on." Some began taking off their clothes. "Not right now." They stopped. I sighed. "There are some locker rooms that way. Put these tights on and meet me in an hour. If I am not here in an hour.......eat some pudding or something."
"Sir Mr. of Legolamb sir!"
"It's of Loxley!" I shouted, but they were already gone. I sighed. "This will be a long two months...."
Please leave comments in this forum or in the feedback sticky.
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 3:43 pm
Were you high when you wrote this?
If so good job...it's pretty creative & funny...lol
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 3:50 pm
training day is hilarious angeli....i meen gerard it reminds me of a certain movie.....
sincerially big stinky ugly baby eating o brien
what happened to post in the feedback thread,dont make me go all OCD on your a**
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 4:06 pm
AlbinoGerard Please leave comments in this forum or in the feedback sticky. Because of that....
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 4:08 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 4:23 pm
Ch. dos
I came back the next day. I know I was supposed to be back hours ago but a certain man in a certain hat is a very good arguer. Needless to say I lost so now I'm stuck with the most pathetic, worthless, sorry bunch of thieves I've -
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"........does he always to that?"
"Don't worry about him Mr. of Coxley, Falls A Lot always does that." A girl eating pudding told me.
I was in disbelief, so I turned over the kid with my foot and asked him, "Are you Falls a Lot?" He smiled and nodded. "Oh well.....carry on."
"Sir yes Sir...............AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" After he was knocked out I decided to begin.
"Okay, now that you all have on your tights I'm going to show you how to shoot an arrow. Watch." I took out my trusty bow and arrow and got it set. I aimed at one of the targets in the targeting range. "You just aim, pull back and let go." Naturally it hit the center. The recruits cheered. "Now pick up your fake bows and arrows. You see they have these new type of arrows with these little plunger thingies on them. That way when you miss, I won't get hurt. Now enjoy!"
"Yes sir, Mr. of Lockinly sir." I groaned angerly, but let it go.
I sat at the stands eating a sandwich and looking at all the hit targets. Three were on Falls a Lot, 15 or so laying aimlessly on the ground, a couple people hit themselves, one in the center of this girls HHHHHHUUUUUUUGGGGGGEEEEEEE butt, one on my sandwich and....Great Scott! Two in an actual target! I quickly jumped down from the stands at looked at a young man about 18 or so and with very light blond hair that blinded me when he shook it. "Ah you there, you're pretty good."
"Really?" Ah! He tuned his head.
"Yes, you were the only one to hit an actual target."
"Oh Goody Goody Goody!" Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Every time he bounced it was like a laser beam hitting my corneas.
"Stop! First of all no black hat jumps around all giddy like that. Second I demand that you dye your hair."
"What color?"
"Black, Black, Super duper dark, Deadly black number two." I handed him the bottle. He was a short lad for his age. "So what's you're name I want to remember you."
"John Jacob Jingle Himer Schmitt."
"Good God, are you related to that Scout?"
He nodded and I nearly fell from the brightness. "Mmmhmm, we're cousins twice removed."
"I can see why. Any way I'll call you Little John."
"Alright!" This time I did fall down.
"Alright," I groaned getting up. "All of you hit the showers. Tomorrow's gonna be brutal."
"Yes Sir, Mr. of Cockamamie Who Ha, Sir!"
"...............Not even close."
The recruits walked of and began hitting the locker rooms. I quickly ran over there.
"What are you doing!?!?!?!?!"
"Hitting the show-"
"I didn't mean literally! Look, take a shower and go to bed in your dorms okay?"
"OH......Goodnight Mr. lo Loxley."
"Almost." I was actually a little impressed. "Good night." I ran up to my room. Maybe thing will get better soon.
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 7:51 pm
ok now all we need is will scarlet and alan a dale and much and you got the whole gang
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 11:39 am
Ch.3
The next day I found out that Little John was very bad at dyeing hair. "Good God man! What did you do to your-"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-huh?" I caught Falls a Lot and through him out of the training arena and walked to Little John. "Your hair! It's all...Blaheuuuuiaiah." I looked upon his head and it was black except for a patch of blond hair in the shape of a weed leaf on the back of his head. "Who dyed your hair?" Little Jhon pointed to the girl from yesterday who informed me on Falls a Lot. "Who are you and why did you do that? If it were not for these sunglasses I would of been blinded!"
"Name's Mary Jane and the bottle ran out before I could fix it." she said. "Besides, it's becoming my symbol now, watch." She took my sword from my scabbered and walked up to a prosthetic tree and waved the sword around. The symbols was now on the tree Zorro style.
"Great swordsman ship, but I must inform you we're a 'Robin Hood' esq type of group, not Zorro. I'm afraid I'm gonna have to tell you- GET LOST!" No matter how good she was I had to stick by The Black Hat's rule.
When she left I got on with my lesson. "Okay kids today we're going to learn how to use a shield like so."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Apparently someone threw back Falls a Lot over to our side, so I put my shield behind me and they collided.
"Wow, that was cool Chitty Chitty Bang Bang!"
"What, uh...who told you about that?" I was getting nervous.
"No one, I was just talking to my imaginary friend over here." the young lad said.
"Oh.......well uh....everyone forget that I said that."
"Yes sir Mr. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, sir."
"Watch next he'll say he was also called Big Stinky Ugly Baby Eating O'Brian or something next." A tall boy whispered.
"Of course not, now let's get started." Just in case the kid knew about my past, I whacked him in the face with my shield for safe keeping.
Well here we go again, some people were okay, but mostly bad. "Oh come on! A shield for protecting not eating!" After I settled that group I walked over to Little John, Scout, and a new kid bouncing Falls a Lot on there shields. "Nice reflects and Falls, way to use your head." I congratulated. "Who's the new kid?"
"Oh he doesn't speak English, he a foreign exchange ninja. He's replacing the pot head." Scout informed me.
"Not to worry lads, I've got this covered. I've traveled the world you know." I turned to the darkly covered ninja and cleared my throat. "lllelelelelelelelelelelelelelelelelelelele le lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala ictchi chitchy chu."
"Wakari-masen."
"Ah ha! His name is Warkari Masen!"
"I don't think-"
"Shut up! Anyway, what can you do?" I made some fighting juestures to see that he understood.
"Oh...Hai." All of a sudden some weird temple music plays in the background.
"Who's doing-" before I can finish Warkari is doing flippy tricks and then out of nowhere grabs two swords out of nowhere and spins them around really fast. When he was done he bowed............and all his clothes suddenly ripped and the music stopped.
"Sumimasen." He said and ran away.
"Oh great, he's just like the rest of them." I sighed. "Oh well see you tomorrow."
"Sir, Mr. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Sir!" I've got to keep my mouth shut.
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 1:02 pm
i though i was supposed to eat the sword
but otherwise it was very good big stinky ugly baby eating o'brien
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 1:30 pm
Japanese Translation
Wakari-masen= I don't understand
Hai= yes
Sumimasen= excuse me
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Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 1:01 pm
Ch.4
"Okay, today we're going to learn how to use the sword, but you'll be getting wood planks instead. Go nuts." I tossed the recruits the planks and instantly three people got knocked out. I was enjoying the fact that only three people were doing well. Wakari, Little John, and Scout. The star pupils. They made me feel good about myself, like the times when I actually trained a great bunch of recruits, not these uhhh.....*looks at a recruit licking the grass*....morons.
"Excuse me Mr. Of Loxley the Foruth." I turned around and I saw The Black Hat under the tunnel.
"Yes, what is it?"
He opened an umbrella and walked toward me. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH-Woah-AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Amazing! The Black Hat used the umbrella's technology to bounce Falls a Lot right back up into the sky! Why didn't I think out that?
"Because you're not smart enough."
"What, eh, uh...Did you guys read my mind?"
"Of course not. What kind of silly question is that Big Stinky Ugly Baby Eating O'Brian."
"I told you never to call me that!"
He laughed, "Anyway enough of the funny business and on to the real business."
"Alright a mission! So what do you want me to do boss? You just say the word and I'll go." My overconfidence is my downfall.
"I need you and five of your best recruits to storm the castle of the evil prince Toilet and steal stuff from there tonight."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Falls a Lot his the ground.
"Tonight? But Hat They-"
"Ah, Ah, Ah, The Black Hat."
"The Black Hat, they're not ready for missions, they can barley make it through training! They'd be better off in dentist school."
"I know and that's why I said your top five. By the way I'd like to see them."
"Now!?!"
"Now."
"Uhh..." I panicked a bit, but then saw my shiny recruits. "Well, there's Little John." He flashed his blond patch of hair at The Black Hat and he winced.
"Charmed."
"And his younger brother, Scout."
"I told you my name is Allowishous-"
"Heh, heh, cute kid. Alright, and we also have our new ninja exchange student, Wakari Masen."
"Watashi no namae wa Hoji desu Bakaru!"
"Yeah, he doesn't speak English, but I can translate. He said-"
"He said my name is Hoji you idiot."
"You're name is Hoji, well I always wonder what your real name was, but now I know Hat! You can't out smart me-"
"His name you moron not my name, besides that's only three you need five."
"Oh uhhh...." I quickly looked around to see who could I pick. "There's Falls a Lot sir."
"That's four."
Damn, I hoped he would of noticed. There really weren't any others. I looked around again and saw the lad licking grass. I walked over to him and picked him up by the fabric around his neck. "And this guy uhh....What's your name kid?" I whispered.
"Charlie...bleh!" He threw up some grass."
"Charlie Bleh, okay The Black Hat that's five."
"Great, see you all tonight." He walked on Falls a Lot and went on his way.
I let go of Charlie. What have I done?
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Posted: Sun Jul 29, 2007 11:58 am
AlbinoGerard Japanese Translation Wakari-masen= I don't understand Hai= yes Sumimasen= excuse me wow i never thought you knew any of that angel...
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Posted: Sun Jul 29, 2007 4:54 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 12:45 pm
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