Welcome to Gaia! ::

And here's another..


My Sweet, Sweet Guardian-Poem-Not edited yet

When I was four
I would get mad
And hit myself
Harder than any dad
Then you would come
And hold my hand
You'd give me your piece of candy
From our teacher
And you'd smile at me
Warming me inside
Then I'd smile back
And you'd kiss the bump I had made
On my head
You'd hug me and tell me I was cool
Then you'd bring me to the sandbox
We'd play all day
Until our parents got mad
Then we'd go to bed
Like good little kids

When I was seven
I'd get upset
And storm around the house
In a rampage
I'd knock things off the wall
And kick my pets
Then I'd fall to the floor
In a sobbing mess
You'd call me then
Somehow knowing I was in distress
You'd some over
And help me clean up
Then you'd make sure
That I wasn't hurt
You'd hold my hand
And we'd ask our parents
To take us to the store
You'd give me some of your allowance
For me to spend on that cute stuffed bunny
Then we'd go back to my house
And you'd spend the night
Making sure
That I was always alright

When I was nine
I went up into my attic
And found my daddy's shotgun
I'd pick the lock
On the his small safe
And I pulled out one shiny bullet
I started to cry
As I fixed the gun up
Then I took advantage of my long arms
And the nail on the wall
And as I readied myself
To be dead
You'd come up from my room
For you had spent the night
And you'd slap me silly
As you unloaded the gun
You'd pull out the nail
And straighten things up
Then go outside
And get the bikes
You helped me on one
As you got on the other
And you'd comfort me
As we road down my driveway
And onto the empty old street
Then we'd look at each other
And smile just slightly
And you made my small heart
Melt like butter

When I was eleven
I stole my dad's motorcycle
And I drove down the road
To the old abandoned shed
From when my neighbour was quite old
And I'd pull out some rope
And I'd grab an old bucket
And I'd tie a noose
And ready the bucket
I'd stand on the rusty old metal
And tie on the rope
Then I'd slip it around my neck
But there was just one more thing
I had to do
Before I was gone
I pulled out my whittling knife
And started to draw
I didn't pay attention
To what I was etching
All I did was think
And I found myself thinking
Only about you
When my hand slipped
I noticed the word
The word etched into my arm
Was you
I didn't notice it before
But I could have sworn
That right then
I was flying
Flying high into the sky
Carefree and giddy
And in my fantasy
The only thing I carried
Was a picture of you
And a lock of your hair
As I stood on that bucket
And realized what luck I had
I slipped the noose off
And slid down the tree
Then I pulled out my new cell phone
And dialed your number
You picked up at once
And came right over
You hugged me
And comforted me
As our tears collided
And then your eyes widened
As you saw my arm
You looked back at me
And smiled so much
I could have sworn
That this was what my fantasy
Was supposed to be

Just over a month ago
While in my thirteenth year
I once again
Started to hurt
Deep down inside
I knew something was wrong with me
But I didn't care
I just wanted to feel that one thing again
I needed to feel pain
The only thing real in my life was you
But you seemed so unreal to me
You seemed like an angel
Who couldn't truly like me
Deep down inside
So I once again
Pulled out that old knife
And I traced that old scar
From that one fateful night
Down at the shed
But this time I thought
That maybe I was wrong
But that thought disappeared
And I went deeper this time
You could almost see my bone
And I was feeling faint
I fell down again
In a sobbing heap
Minutes later
I was passed out
On my cold kitchen floor
You were starting to wonder
Why I hadn't called you yet
As I had promised earlier
And you started to worry
You came quickly over
On your bike
And threw the door open
Trying to find me
You looked in the kitchen
And immediately started to cry
You ran over to me
And checked my pulse
You called the ambulance
Who rushed over
And when I finally woke up
You were there by my side
You smiled
No
You grinned
Then you hugged me so tightly
I almost turned blue
And before I knew it
Your lips were on mine
And as I closed my eyes
I said your name one more time
And our tears
Had collided
For the last time

Now we are happy
We are together
We'll forever be each other's angel
And we'll never let the other
Forget that
I won't for sure
Because your name
Is etched into my skin
And my heart
Thank you
My dear guardian


She's a suicidal girl in love with a sweet-hearted guy, hooked on a dead-young boy, missing a good old friend, hating her ex-boyfriend, living the life that most people want, dealing with the stress that most people brush off, wishing for a new world, waiting for the right one, visiting her inner soul, discovering the real-life awesomeness


Thanks for reading.

Aww, thanks. =]

I have to say, you're a serious poet. Your work is extremely deep. I like it, because it makes me think... damn, even reading it makes me feel more serious... which is an extremely hard thing to do when I'm in a happy mood, which I was in. Lol, don't feel guilty... I've been getting a lot of depressed moments here lately... it'll pass... I think. Anyways, I have to say I really like your style, as well as your vocabulary and just the raw emotion in the work. I MUST say I'm DYING to hear My December in a song... it just seems so cool. Anyhow, I'm sorry I haven't commented, that is my own shortcoming. I cannot apologize for the others, though I must say it is a shame that such awesome work has only gotten one, very short comment. I've been really bad about not commenting, so I'm going to go read through some of the other newer works... oh, I almost forgot... I think my favorite one isssss.... hmm... My Sweet, Sweet Guardian... I'll be damned if I said it didn't make me cry. I have to say, it's really touching. mrgreen Okay, I'm off to comment.

Fallen From Hell

Waterfalls of tears
Cries of hysteria
Sobs of pleas
Nothing can save her

One thrust
Two fists
Three times
It’s over

Blood dripping
Into pools of tears
Bile slipping
From her mouth

An angry shout
A tired yell
The two parents argue
She splits from HELL

There’s no way
To save him
His mind
Is gone, lost from all

Chocolate babies,
They come to tell
The story of, the one who
FELL

i said i'd check them out! blaugh you're really good! yeah, dante deus had a point, do you have tunes for any of these? your refrains, especially, are dying to be sung... lovely! keep writing!

Smile: For Suki

I can always make you smile
Whether it’s every day
Or just once in a while
I won’t need any pay
Because when you smile
It makes my day
With every number on the dial
I pray and pray
That you’ll always make ME smile
And every time you say
That you love me, we smile
So please hear me this day
When you hear my smile
As it cracks today
That it’ll be a while
Before I can finally say
I love to smile

Wow. I haven't read all of them yet, but I figured I'd comment anyways. I'm very sorry that I hadn't commented before now.

I like My Sweet, Sweet Guardian, I do. I like how it's in a story, almost, telling of how you were saved and protected at each instance, each age. It's quite long, but doesn't lose its touch. It's nicely written. There's no consistent rhyme, but now and them you get a treat of sounds, and that's nice. It's a very sad story, with a very happy ending. I have my own opinion on suicide, but it's part of the story, and that's all that matters. I'm glad it had a happy ending.