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 Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2007 7:02 pm
Ok lets have a joke post. Everytime you enter a message it has to have a joke attached. Any joke but try and keep it clean.
First Joke Woot.
Park Politics
A man is sitting on a bench in the park reading a newspaper. Suddenly he throws the paper onto the ground and yells, “All politicians are *ssholes.”
A man sitting next to him in a finely pressed suit says, “I take offense to that!”
The pissed-off guy asks him, “Why? Are you a politician?”
“No," he replies, "I'm an *sshole.”
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Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2007 7:06 pm
Diver Meets Guy Underwater
One day, a diver was enjoying the aquatic world 20 feet below sea level. He noticed a guy at the same depth he was, with no scuba gear on whatsoever.
The diver went below another 10 feet, but the guy joined him a minute later. The diver went below 15 more feet, and a minute later, the same guy joined him.
This confused the diver, so he took out a waterproof pad and pencil, and wrote, "Amazing! How are you able to stay this deep down without equipment?"
The guy took the pencil and pad, erased what the diver had written, and wrote, "I'm drowning, you moron!"
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2007 9:16 am
the first two were funny, but the second one... ya that was stupid.
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “Operator! Operator! My friend is dead! What should I do?” The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” After a few moments of silece, a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line breathing heavly. He says: “OK, now what?"
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2007 10:46 am
Ok since that one was bad i deleted it how about this...
TOP 10 SIGNS YOUR FAMILY IS STRESSED...
10. Conversations often begin with "Put the gun down, and then we can talk".
9. The school principal has your number on speed-dial.
8. The cat is on Valium.
7. People have trouble understanding your kids, because they learned to speak through clenched teeth.
6. You are trying to get your four-year-old to switch to decaffeinated.
5. The number of jobs held down by family members exceeds the number of people in the family.
4. No one has time to wait for microwave TV dinners.
3. "Family meetings" are often mediated by law enforcement officials.
2. You have to check your kid's day-timer to see if he can take out the trash.
1. Maxwell House gives you industrial rates.
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