Welcome to Gaia! ::

Hello, everyone. I'm new in this guild, but not to Gaia (this is a mule account). Nice to be here. (: Anyways, I have a bit of a "coming out issue."

See, I'm not even fifteen yet. I only figured out that I was stuck in a body I disliked earlier in the school year. It was a gradual process; it started with me becoming frustrated only on my period last school year, but that's typical. Then my hatred towards being born into a female body seemed to last more and more and now, here I am.

Anyways, onto my helluva mother. She is the devil when it comes to my masculinity. I once got scolded for buying female's t-shirts. Yes, female's. Everytime I wear a dress shirt, or something the slightest bit manly, mom either makes little comments like "you should accessorize to look feminine, honey, I don't like that masculine look" or flat out yell at me.

Another thing that worries me is the last time I came out about something not-too-great; the fact that I despised my mother's religion. She was less than satisfied, of course, but she did the uneccessary thing of ignoring me. In my mind, I pictured us sharing a dramatic moment, my mother saying she wouldn't push me to do something I hate. Yes, we're talking about, but I still have to attend religious ceremonies. I don't have to study ahead of time or comment on it, but I'm expected to pretend like it's the happiest place in the world for me to be.

Her last response is something that bothers me. I'm pretty sure this would be even more difficult for her to handle than the last news, and I'm afraid maybe she won't support me at all.

I was thinking maybe I should just wait until she questions my sexuality (which she does every once in a while, but I'm not sure.

What should I do?

Until I move out? That'd be a problem; I'd rather die than go through high school as a girl. I know high school drama is just s**t and it's just the same old stuff as middle school and grade school (to me, at least) but I'd like to at least be able to crossdress by the time I'm a junior.

Edit: xD, I find it ironic that's she's raising her voice to someone on the phone right now.

Yeah, I'm with six-speed on this one.
Keeping one's head down to avoid controversy is irritating, but also eminently sensible. With your wits about you, it's remarkably easy to go behind your parents' backs. (Though admittedly I've been comparatively lucky.) It also helps to have some time before social transition, in order to get everything sorted in your head.
The years pass faster than you think. It seemed like years before I'd get the change to be myself when I first realised I was trans, and now it's barely months until I'm out of here.

My own mother went through that issue as well, and trust me, she still doesn't take well to how I dress currently.

'You look like a boy!'
'You should wear tighter shirts!'
'Maybe we should buy you a padded bra...'
'Wear brighter colors!'

Which really you're in high school right? (Congrats by the way, HS is stressful but trust me its a ton of fun if you find the right group) Try to get a locker, or a friends locker. I used to keep a spare set of my style clothing in a friend's locker and every morning I'd go and switch them out before changing back before going home. -small shrug- If you start small, usually parent's tend to gradually accept it. It's one step at a time after all, and yeah...it's tough. It's going to be tough, just because people are...people, by nature. Anything strange or against their beliefs are something they rebel to. My own religious beliefs still aren't known to my mother to this very DAY because of that reason. ^^'

Try to stay tough there lad, it'll work out in the end. Until then, just try to be you even if you can't dress the way you want to quite yet. sweatdrop

XD It does please me to be told that I look like a boy, it's one of several reasons I just shut up and deal with her by wearing my neon orange hoodie becasuse well...its bright colors neh?

Gotta love the tight-tight shirts that are like...PAPER thin so you freeze your bloody arse off...-.- hn.

My wardrobe is entirely full of mens clothes that are bright (a fair few bright oranges and yellows), but they are not flamboyant.. I don't get the whole "men = drab unless they are flaming" thing... unless it is a culture thing...

The bright clothes thing is an interesting one - I haven't seen much of that divide round my neck of the woods. The lads I know love their garish tops, and the most macho of them are happy to wear pastel pink. I myself have a couple of eye-burning orange shirts, and far too much tartan stuff, though admittedly I mostly dress in murky colours. Not out of social obligation, just that I think it suits me better.
Still - wear what you damn well want, chaps. Bright colours are for everyone!