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 Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:28 pm
I know that I'm not exactly suave with language. However, what I write I mean. Please don't quote my whole poem, if your feel the need to quote. Keep in mind that my muse is very faulty. Yet I hope that your soul is able to feel the words.
Gallows
[SpeedyGuido]
Now I'm feeling the pain,
I know I'm going insane.
Before I was living in vain,
Now I'm living to end slain.
I see your face in my dreams,
I drown inside your screams.
Tearing at the seams,
You forever haunt my dreams.
The most beautiful thing,
will always sting.
Broken like my only wing,
The joy my death must bring.
To end your sorrows with me,
Our love can never be.
Just promise to see,
What it's like to be free.
Tonight will drop with speed,
You image will be my lead.
Stop crying I'll succeed,
Just don't watch me bleed.
The visions will end with the moon,
Things couldn't be more opportune.
You were the most attune,
To my crimson boon.
The will is hot like my frozen life cold.
The only thing I could finish completely,
Will have to be the last thing you see.
Tonight the hell will end and begin.
Fading,
I'll haunt you, like you haunt me.
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:29 pm
Black Sentence
[Speedy Guido]
Standing in a room full of death,
They walk to and fro mumbling.
Mumbling curses that sentence doom,
upon any in the path.
The words stick in your throat,
As you grip my face.
What will you say,
When the words will pour?
Will you dismiss me,
With the furies?
Will you pledge to me,
Love of sempiternal date?
Your blushing eyes haze over,
with silica tears streaming.
Hope ever present,
In my throbbing heart.
You lips part!
How I long to drink forth,
the fair words from your ravishing mouth!
My beautiful one.
But the notes that fall forth,
They aren't lovely wings,
for my heart of green.
No solace I find.
They are beautifully black,
the syllables break my soul.
A hole grows within,
What have you done to me?
I am datelessly ruined,
Awfully devastated forever more.
I want to fade into this sick pain.
I know that you are lost.
You took my heart,
You held it high.
I thought it was to show the world,
Your triumph, your love.
But you held it yet higher,
Just to dash it to pieces,
Increasing the scathe 10 fold.
And my pain goes on.
Your beauty turns from me.
Your lips closed.
Those blushing eyes,
Make my heart bleed.
And it bleeds,
the black sentence,
Over and over,
endlessly.
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:32 pm
Reserved for future poems.
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:36 pm
I'm being frank when I say that your style is unlike anything I've ever read....but it's cool at the same time...
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:38 pm
willowbyrd I'm being frank when I say that your style is unlike anything I've ever read....but it's cool at the same time... That's good because styles should be quite unique. Thanks for your comment!
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:40 pm
neutral you are very strange....but that's a complement! keep it up I wanna read more soon!
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Kharne Bloodhowler Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 5:10 pm
I agree with you. Styles should be unique. It sounds and feels like lyrics to a black metal song or perhaps a ballad if the style was changed. It is very good in the end.
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Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2007 8:25 am
I'm very glad that you liked my ending. It took the most to work through.
I've made a new poem. It's a blank verse. I know it's pretty long. But I think it's pretty good.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 8:40 am
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Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 4:45 pm
Ooohh, nice. "Black Sentence" feels familiar to me....hm. Interesting. All those hopes dashed to tiny bits...yep, sounds very familiar to me. Love hurts, and love is war.
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Kharne Bloodhowler Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 6:40 pm
Black Sentence strikes a much stronger chord within the confines of my mind...it paints quite a vivid picture...much stronger than Gallows
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Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 9:09 am
I agree. For a brief moment my muse returned to me. That and my ex called. xd Anyway, I always do better with blank verse.
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