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Today is the anniversary of my dead ex boyfriend. I will write our story. I will try to be as blunt as possible. I don’t like going into detail.

If your not going to read it, then please don't post, and I don't want people saying "Your too young to love!" Or "Get over it." That pisses me off.

In 8th grade, I fell in love with a guy named Johnny. He was half white, half Japanese. He was around 6'1 tall and skinny. We met when I accidentally ran into him when I was running away from a teacher. When I bumped into him we both hit our heads with each others that made both of us pass out. I woke up in the nurse’s office and I looked over to my right and I saw him just laying there too passed out. I busted out in laughter and the school nurse just shook her head and walked out. I sat up on the edge of the bed and waited for him to wake up so I could apologize. When he did wake up I asked the usual questions like "You okay?" And "Do you have a headache?" He just shook his head no and sat up and put his glasses on and looked at me. Right when I was about to apologize he raised his hand and thanked me. His next class he had to take an exam and a project that he wasn't ready for and the little run in made him excused for both things. So, after that day, we sat together at lunch and talked between classes and pulled practical jokes on other students and teachers. I would go over to his house and he was the person who introduced me to DDR (Dance Dance Revolution). Sooner or later, he asked me to be his girlfriend and of course I said yes. The whole school started freaking out when they found out that I had gotten a boyfriend. I tend to come off as a loner so a lot of people were shocked by this event. We had great times together, though we were to young to get too intimate with each other. So 8th grade through very begging of 9th grade we were together.

Then...he died.

He got into a car crash and he wasn't wearing his seatbelt. He flew out of his seat and through the front window and into the other car that they had a crashed head on into. The other car was a drunk driver and that's why I have a thing against people who drink and drive. He didn't die instantly. He was rushed to the hospital and in emergency care for awhile. I waited in the waiting room for what seemed like forever. A doctor came out and said he was still breathing, but he wouldn't be for very long. His organs were slowly shutting down. There was nothing they could do. When I herd the doctor say this I rushed into the room and saw him. His face was horribly scratched up. He had an oxygen mask on him and they were still sewing up some of his deep wounds. He looked at me and I tried to run up to him and hug him, but the nurses were pushing me out of the room. I remember my screaming and the 5 nurses that had a hard time getting me out of the room. Alacia and Alex were at the door way watching everything shocked.(They are/were my best friends) Then Johnny looked at me with such sadness in his eyes. I screamed more. Then...a loud ongoing eerie beep ran though the room. I stopped struggling and screaming. Alacia and Alex took my hands and walked me out of the room.

The next 3 months I became mute. I wouldn't talk to anyone. I had to go to an institution and they helped and they made me talk again.

Today is a first year anniversary of his death , I am still angry that he died, and to make matters worse, on November 17, of 2006 my best friend Alex died of cancer. Life loves to s**t on me, doesn’t it?

I hate it that their dead. And sometimes I hate myself because my mind keeps thinking that I could have done something to prevent their death. I constantly hate the world for what it is doing to me. It’s like I am some contagious disease. If anyone gets close me, they either die or just slip out of my life. I can never have a firm grasp on friends. I guess that’s why people describe me as a loner. People see me working just fine without friends, but their wrong. Friends are the things that keep me happy. Friends are my tunnel of light in this abyss of darkness. I love friends, but I’m not sure they love me.

I deeply apreciate that.
Thank you.
*Glomps*

awww im so sorry cry
i know how u feel * hugs u*

I understand how you feel. Heh ^.^' I mean why else would I make this forum as such as it is. I dont really feel up to writing all the info I can on my friend. I'll just say we knew each other for 6 or 7 years and were finally going to see each other in person in June of 2006 and he died January in a car accident. I totally understand. I'm so sorry you had to suffer this. Death is a final pain that nobody can erase. I believe you loved him with all your heart. Just so you know though your title. Nobody will say get over it nobody will say your to young for love. If someone does They will answer to me. ^.^- If they can't answer they will be banned. Love knows no age nor bounds. I believe that its was true between you too. As was my love of my friend Derrick.