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Didn't want to invade the other thread. Here's a fic I wrote today. mrgreen And it is, of course, a Jared/Mattie slashie.

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Do You Remember?


Do you remember all that we had? The love we shared. Do you remember all of the things you told me? How much you loved me. Do you remember everything I said back? How much I loved you. But do you still love me?


Do you remember the first time we kissed?

Jared bit his lip as he stared across the bus. He had studied his for the longest time, taking in every feature. He hadn't told him what he thought of him for fear that he would get angry or uncomfortable and quit the band. Jared didn't know how much longer he could keep his feelings in though. He wanted to just come out and tell Matt how he felt. How attractive he though he was. How cute he was when he smiled and laughed. The feeling that he felt when he looked at his tall, lean form. Jared wanted to tell Matt everything. And he did.
He and Matt ended up being the last ones to go to bed that night. It was all Jared could ever hope for. The perfect chance for him to tell his secret. They were watching a movie and would only talk every once and a while. It was awkward for Jared to choose the correct moment. Then it came.
Matt got up. "I think I'm going to go to bed," he said, yawning. The sight gave Jared butterflies. They multiplied as he got up to.
"Matt," he called quietly.
The taller man turned and as soon as he did Jared pressed his lips into Matt's and kissed him until Matt pulled back. He stared with wide eyes at Jared for a moment before he came forward and kissed Jared back. It was a dream come true. Their lips carassed each other's and their tongues massaged each other's mouths.
After a few minutes of making out they were forced to pull back from each other. They smiled at each other for a moment before Matt closed the privacy doors and Jared went back to the couch.

Do you remember that, Matt? How we kissed each other. I loved you so much and I thought that you felt the same. I was sure that you loved me back. You wouldn't have kissed me if you didn't love me. But now is appears that you don't really love me. You married her instead of staying with me. You chose her after all we had gone through together.


Do you remember the first time you told me that you loved me?

The two had been keeping up a little charade for a while. Whenever they were alone they would kiss and hold each other. Touch each other. Jared still hadn't told Matt that he loved him. He always got caught up in their kissing that he would forget to say it. And afterwards the butterflies in his stomach wouldn't let him say it either.
One night it had to come out though. They had just played a concert and during it Jared could not keep his eyes off of Matt. He couldn't keep away from him and kept beside him while they played. He even gave Matt an indirect song dedication, stating that the dedicatee was someone who he loved very much. He had been looking at Matt the entire time.
When they went backstage after their set to cool off, Matt brought Jared to the side and told the others that they would be back in a few minutes. Matt held Jared's hand tightly as they kissed each other. It was a truely romantic moment that would stay with them forever. Matt held Jared and Jared held him back. They melted into each other.
"I love you," Matt had finally said it into Jared's ear. It caught Jared off guard. He smiled to himself as he squeezed Matt tighter.
"I love you too. I always have and I always will."

I thought that you would always love me too. You always said that even if we were caught you'd keep loving me. Even if it ruined our lives you'd keep on loving me. Even if you lost it all you'd keep on loving me. You don't love me now though and none of those things even happened. You love her. You chose her. And I gave you everything. Was everything not enough to make our love true? What has she given you that I haven't? What can I do to make you change your mind? I'll do anything for you. Anything for your love.


Do you remember the first time you made love to me?

Matt rang the doorbell and waited, looking around the porch of the large house. The door opened revealing Jared's smiling face. He jumped into Matt's arms and they helf each other in silence for a moment with smiles of love on their lips. Jared kissed Matt before leading by the hand inside.
"Can I get you anything? Some food? Or a drink? Anything you want," Jared asked welcomingly. He had been waiting for the day that Matt would be alone with him in the privacy of Jared's own home.
Matt shook his head as he looked around the house. When he looked back toward where Jared was he found himself kissing the man. A smile spread into that kiss and before long Jared was leading Matt upstairs and into his room.
Jared licked his lips as he felt Matt's body with his fingers through the shirt Matt was wearing. He took a moment to look into Matt's eyes. A fire was lit there and soon they were removing each other's clothes quickly.
Matt pushed Jared onto the bed, kissing him from his lips down to his neck and then his chest. Jared took in pleasured breaths as Matt went lower and lower. Jared ran his fingers through Matt's hair. Matt came back up and flipped Jared over. Jared was on his hands and knees on the bed and prepared for Matt's entry.
Matt was so gentle and caring. He thrusted slowly and tried his best to make it comfortable. Their breathing was harsh but pleasurable as Matt picked up the pace. His thrusts became deeper and his movements sharper. Their moans became louder and louder as they neared climax. And when they did it was complete ecstacy. They belonged to each other.
Matt pulled out and collapsed beside Jared, pulling him close and they breathed heavily with each other. Jared rested his head on Matt's bare chest while Matt nuzzled Jared's hair, kissing his head softly. They didn't need to speak. All they needed to do was lay with each other. Sleep with each other. Love each other.

Why did you do that if you didn't really love me? Why did you give yourself to me? Sometimes I wonder why I gave myself to you until I remember how much I love you. You pledged yourself to me. You told me that you would never leave me. That you would always be with me. Well, you're not with me now. You're off getting married to her. Spending the rest of your life with her. Not with me like you said you would. You're not here to hold me or kiss me or comfort me. Not here you scare away my nightmares and fears. Not here to say "I love you and I always will," you never loved me.


Do you remember when I told you that I hated you?

Matt came onto the bus with a huge smile on his face. Jared saw him and smiled back, thinking that it was for him. He was wrong. Matt told the bus crew to gather around. Shannon, Tomo, Jared, and the rest of the MARScommittee. All came and Matt told them why he was smiling.
"I proposed to Libby last night," he said. "And she said yes."
Shannon threw his arms around Matt and so did Tomo as the crew cheered. Jared was the only one who wasn't cheering. He stood behind everyone else, a look of hurt on his face. Matt saw the look and his eyes became solemn and desolate as we watched Jared walk away off the bus.
When the excitement cleared Matt followed after Jared. He was sitting against the front of the bus, his knees curled up to his chest where he hugged them. Matt stood over him.
"Why?" Jared asked, a cold hurt in his voice. "Why after all we've been through?"
Matt didn't know how to answer. "She came before you. I love her."
"You told me that you loved me! What happened to us?! To the love you gave me!?" the tears fell from Jared's eyes. Tears of sadness and hatred.
Matt tried to make it better. He came down and tried to hold him, to kiss the tears away like he always did before. Jared pushed him away and got up, drying his tears. Matt came up too, looking into Jared's blue eyes.
"I hate you," Jared said, piercing an emotional knife through Matt's heart. "You never loved me. You used me. I hate you."
He turned and went back onto the bus, leaving who he once gave his heart to to put his head down and sub regretfully.

It hurt didn't it? To know that you were hated by someone who once gave so much to you. I gave you my heart and I thought that I had your's but it was all fake. All of the holding, touching, kissing. The love we made. You faked it all. I never faked anything. My love was real. My holding, touching, kissing. The love I made to you. It was all real. I loved you more than life itself. Does that mean that my life is nothing now? Since your love was my life and now it's non-existant. What if I died? Would you care?


Do you remember when you caught me making love to someone else?

They had all gone out to celebrate Matt's engagement. Jared came too but not to celebrate. He kept his distance from everyone especially Matt. They went to a bar and had a few rounds of drinking. No one seemed to notice Matt's sadness or the hatred in Jared's eyes. Everyone was too happy to notice the tension between the two.
Eventually Jared disappeared... and so did Tomo. Jared has whispered something in the young guitarist's ear. Tomo had nodded quickly and followed Jared back to the bus.
Jared was rough with him, pulling off his clothes quickly and pushing him into his bunk. Jared went into him forcefully. The small space of the bunk made it even more uncomfortable. Tomo moaned and groaned, occassionally letting out a weak "ow" or whimper. They reached a quick climax and laid in the bunk together, breathing heavily in pleasure and pain.
Time stood still for a moment before the curtain was pulled back, Matt looking in wide-eyed. He quickly pulled the curtain forward and slammed the privacy door. Jared allowed himself a sick smile as he cuddled up with Tomo.

How much did that hurt? It hurts me so much now as I think about it. I regret all of the pain I've caused you. I realize that I don't hate you anymore. I still love you with all of my heart. Can you forgive me? I know that you can't love me, but can you forgive me? I love you so much, Mattie. I always have and I always will. Even if you don't love me. I'll always be ready though. Ready to hold you and touch you and kiss you. Ready to make love to you. You're still mine. You always will be. Always. You'll always be my everything. Because I remember the love we shared. But do you? Do you remember?

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Do reflect, siblings. Say anything you want... be nice though. mrgreen

Hahaha. Thanks. mrgreen

*cries* Poor Jared. Poor Mattie.

Stupid Libby . . . . evil

xd Very good, Karikachan!

I have a Jared/Matt/Libby story that I wrote a few weeks ago. I'll have to try and get it up.

It was good but I'm weirded out...

I feel like I relate to some of this though.. like some of the feelings. not any of the actions though...

it was very good though your writingis excellent!

i loved it you gotta write more soon. i really liked it. but a little grossed out. but we all need that in a good story

Damn you and your excellent writing, Karika-chan! crying Again, I seriously bawled like a b***h like I always do teared up big time! And I had to have my mom give me a hug and tell me the story of how my dad emotionally ate a bag of animal crackers when his favorite baseball team lost. rofl LoL Being emotional runs in my family, it seems. Anyways, great story, like always! Keep up the good work, darling! heart

um this is fanFICTION right??

lol am i being really slow????

nothink jw