well...i've been thru quite a bit since i've posted on here.. met a girl... feel in love with her but she was just after my sex and left me... i started cutting.. abusing my body with drugs behind my friends backs...being anti-social...i loved her so bad...gave her as much love as i could...then she told me to kill myself when one day...i actually tried...the dumbest idea you can have....

now the drepression is crashing even harder...i went on lithium for about 2months then faked that i was getting better. i hated what it did to my heart...it made me lust.......i met another girl but i couldn't even get close to her.....so her best friend started befriending me to make us closer...but really i was falling in love with the other...so now both of them stay away from me....the drepession would hit me on bad days...when i should of been showing me love as hard as i could....so now i'am alone....and my friends can't stand me....for all the mistakes i've made in my life.....they can't stand to see a failure around them...it breaks their heart into piece i guess....or my heart....

i love her still...
i feel remores... talk2hand