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 Posted: Mon May 08, 2006 10:47 am
I got this email from one of my buddies on aol...hilarious...
"Dear Husband:
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've
been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.
P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving
away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Your EX-Wife"
------------------------
"Dear Ex-Wife:
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born
Carla. I hope that's not a problem.
Signed Rich As Hell and Free!"
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Posted: Mon May 08, 2006 1:21 pm
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Posted: Mon May 08, 2006 3:12 pm
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Posted: Mon May 08, 2006 3:13 pm
President Bush recently went to a primary school in Macon, Georgia, to talk about the world. After his talk, he asked if the children had any questions. One little boy put up his hand, and the president asked him his name.
"Kenneth"
"And what is your question, Kenneth?"
"I have three questions:
1 ... Whatever happened to the weapons of mass destruction?
2 ... Why did you give a tax break to the super wealthy?
3 ... Did you steal votes to win both elections?"
Just then the bell rang for recess. President Bush informed the kiddies that they would continue after recess.
When they resumed, the President said, "OK, where were we? Oh, that's right, question time.
Who has a question?"
A different little boy put his hand up. Bush pointed him out and asked him his name.
"Larry"
"And what is your question, Larry?"
"I have five questions:
1 .. Whatever happened to the weapons of mass destruction?
2 ... Why did you give a tax break to the super wealthy?
3 ... Did you steal votes to win both elections?
4 .. Why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early?
5 ... What happened to Kenneth?"
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Posted: Mon May 08, 2006 3:55 pm
*claps*
That was so funn! *dances* rofl
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Posted: Tue May 09, 2006 6:20 am
Maikufallenangel *claps* That was so funn! *dances* rofl LOL!
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Posted: Tue May 09, 2006 2:25 pm
[ Message temporarily off-line ]
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2006 7:11 am
[ Message temporarily off-line ]
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2006 7:15 am
all i seem to get is chainletters stare
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2006 12:32 pm
Darkie_Zade_E I got this email from one of my buddies on aol...hilarious..."Dear Husband: I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone. P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life! Your EX-Wife" ------------------------ "Dear Ex-Wife: Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care. P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem. Signed Rich As Hell and Free!" Man that is classic rofl
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2006 1:56 pm
Aikichii Darkie_Zade_E I got this email from one of my buddies on aol...hilarious..."Dear Husband: I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone. P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life! Your EX-Wife" ------------------------ "Dear Ex-Wife: Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care. P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem. Signed Rich As Hell and Free!" Man that is classic rofl oh yeah lol!
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Posted: Tue May 16, 2006 1:25 pm
I think the funniest one I got is when people ask you to go to their country to withdraw money from a special bank account those things make me laugh all the time.
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Posted: Tue May 16, 2006 3:44 pm
Aikichii I think the funniest one I got is when people ask you to go to their country to withdraw money from a special bank account those things make me laugh all the time. I got one of them. Some guy got that and was talking back and got them to put signs up and take pix like rectum intrusion association and they took pix with these signs and sent them back since they couldn't speak english. It was kinda mean though.
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