Welcome to Gaia! ::

Ouch. Well, when talking to your girlfriend, I'd suggest that you say that you're not sure how much control you have anymore, so you need to stop while you still can. And then, once you say you're going to stop, do so.

Really, though, if you're ever in need of support, we're all here for you. And that goes for anyone else who's having problems of this nature, as well.

Thanks guys.

I told my parents pretty much all the details.
They're not that pissed off or anything, but they have their requests...

They want me to break up with my girlfriend, which I haven't yet cause I've been avoiding her.

They want me to spend the summer working on some drugfree farm.

And they want me to move away next year to university (if by some chance I do get in) or travel to get away from here. They already have plans to change my room into a library.

I think my parents are starting to understand that theres almost nothing for teenagers to do in this city except for get in trouble and/or surf.

I think their requests are fair enough.

So for the next few weeks I'm going to try to avoid all drugs including cigarettes... My inner body probably looks like a toxic waste dump right now.

I'm learning that the hard way. I'm a ******** chimney.

I'm trying to replace bad habits with good habits. Like if I'm at home and I'm stressed out, I start cleaning stuff up instead of smoking a bowl or a cigarette.

I've only smoked two joints since my last post, and one joint was today (420, how could I not?).

And I broke up with my girlfriend 2 days ago, who wasn't too happy and now calls me "the sxe f*****t." And that pretty much killed my connections to cocaine, designer drugs, and all the chemical garbage I was doing.

I feel a lot better physically too, stronger and healthier. And my mom's got me on a holistic vegan diet (which is bland as ********, but eh...)