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 Posted: Sat Jan 03, 2026 10:14 pm
4:34 PM, January 4thHey! My name's Blarney, another Squire of Earth. I got your name from Joy. I really want to connect with other Earth Knights, so...hi! If Joy has told you about me......she's totally making up all the bad stuff and way downplaying the good stuff 😇 4:35 PMAnyway, hi! If you ever have any questions or need someone to patrol with or need help with your Wonder or anything, just let me know! 4:36 PM😊👍
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Posted: Sat Jan 03, 2026 10:25 pm
4:35 PM
funny how she does that. she does the exact same thing when she talks about me.
4:35 PM
what kinda questions are you equipped to answer exactly
4:36 PM
like where's the best place around here to get hangover food at three am if you only have five bucks type questions
4:36 PM
or what's the distance from here to the moon type questions
4:36 PM
or how ******** weird is it to be alive, man🌿🍃🥬 type questions
4:36 PM
or just like the knight s**t
4:36 PM
tryna get my ducks in a row before I start the interrogation
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Posted: Sat Jan 03, 2026 10:35 pm
4:37 PMUh, well, I've lived here all my life but I've never been hung over. So maybe 50% of that first one? There are some really good hole in the wall places I could show you, and then you can tell me if they would be good for the hangover thing. 4:38 PMFor like...science facts I'd probably just check the internet? Or I could ask my sister. She's scary smart and watches documentaries for fun. 4:38 PMBut speaking of the moon did you know we can go there?? Has Joy told you about The Code? She haaaaates The Code. I don't think it's THAT bad but it is a trip and a half as a concept and in practice 4:38 PMNot that kind of tri| [UNSENT] 4:39 PMSo I guess mostly knight stuff but I'm game for whatever questions are on your mind and I'll do my best! I've asked eleventy-billion questions so I think it's only fair that someone grill me for a change. Bring it on!
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Posted: Sat Jan 03, 2026 10:48 pm
4:40 pm
joy hates anyone that tells her what to do. and it kinda does if you think about it. I am aware of the code and not personally acquainted.
4:40 pm
how old are you? or are you just straight edge or something. do kids still do the straight edge thing these days
4:41 pm
or are you one of those disgusting people who never gets hungover
4:41 pm
how long have you been doing this? sounds like youre an expert but maybe that's what comes of being wise enough to ask eleventy billion questions
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Posted: Sat Jan 03, 2026 10:58 pm
4:42 PMWise? Are you 🥬right n| [UNSENT] 4:42 PMWell, I've only been doing this for about six months or so, so definitely not an expert yet lol if such a thing is even possible. But I do know a Jupiter Knight who probably is as close to an expert as there is, if you want to skip right over me! I won't be offended, we can tag team him lol 4:43 PMI'm 18. I know, I'm a baby, blah blah blah, whatever. I'm not like. Intentionally straight edge but I guess technically I am doing the thing that straight edge...rs? Do? Is that what they call themselves? I had to look up what straight edge means. I thought you were asking me about my angles and I was very confused lol 4:44 PMbut honestly based on everything else about me I bet I will be one of those disgusting people who never gets hungover. It just seems right in my mind 4:46 PMWhat's your Wonder like?
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Posted: Sat Jan 03, 2026 11:15 pm
(Maus, who had been busily composing a message about tag teaming, received the message about Blarney being eighteen in just enough time to retract it before its being sent. He then recalibrated his expectations for the conversation accordingly.)
4:47 pm
like my sense of humor, dark and shitty.
4:47 pm
also outdated and full of dead ends and disappointment. really the similarities are endless.
4:48 pm
joy says a wonder looks like its owner the way an old dog does. so what's the wonder of a straight edge baby with eleventy billion questions who doesn't get hungover probably (pending data) look like? full of sunshine im guessing.
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 7:33 pm
Blarney
5:22 PM Well there is a lot of sunshine, but I think that's just cause the weather is weird there. It's a castle! And it is kind of falling apart but she's workin on it, she's doin her best (Blarney did not want to think about what it Means that Castle Blarney looks a lot more put-together from the outside than it does on the inside. So he didn't.) Blarney
5:22 PM Do you want me to hook you up with that Jupiter Knight? If you want someone who knows all the things?
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 7:45 pm
5:24 PM
i got some kinda oppositional defiance disorder or whatever it's called. i don't do well with authority and i have a sensitive ego that's easily wounded when people don't like me, so maybe let's skip dooming me to a depressive episode. weather's too nice to be bummed out.
5:25 PM
if you know anyone who likes to politely laugh at bad jokes and has low standards for approval, though, give me their names any time you want
5:25 PM
didn't realize that people did active networking over on this side, to be honest. you've exposed me to a whole new world over here.
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 7:55 pm
Blarney
5:26 PM hey that's me! i love bad jokes! idk about my standards but i promise i'll never intentionally make you feel like a failure. and god knows i'm not an authority figure for........................anyone, ever LOL Blarney
5:26 PM to be fair i don't know if everyone networks. idk if that's what i'm doing, but i guess it could be. i just really really really hate how little like....safety net there is for new knights so i'm really... idk i make myself very obnoxious on purpose because it's the only way to cover for people who can't or don't want to or don't know how to. most people are pretty cool about being talked to tho. and i will say that our guys are very very good about like...responding when someone needs help, whether like in the field or doing a whole planet thing. have you met any aliens yet?
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 8:07 pm
5:26 PM
yeah, a couple. was a little disappointed by the lack of a whole x-files style exciting reveal or whatever
5:26 PM
there's more of a safety net than you think
5:27 PM
consider how much energy and how many moving parts it takes to be constantly creating new lives for people from scratch. aliens or former agents or whoever. that's nothing to sneeze at. i have a fake social security number. i have to pay taxes, man. that's wild.
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 8:15 pm
Blarney
5:32 PM Yeah, I guess that's true. Blarney
5:33 PM tbh i try not to think about the memory zapping part and the stuff around that because it really really really freaks me out. really really bad Blarney
5:34 PM did you know there used to be a school for knights? like knights in the waybackwhen days would actually get trained? rather than have to figure it all out and hope for the best non-dying option you can manage?
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 8:17 pm
5:36 PM
used to be a lot of s**t we don't have anymore. like actual battlefields, for one. take the good with the bad, you know
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 8:33 pm
Blarney
5:37 PM Now who's mister sunshine? 😛 Blarney
5:37 PM Buuuut you're right, you're right. I shouldn't complain. Blarney
5:40 PM anyway. did you have any knight questions? seems like you already know the stuff that blew my mind lol Blarney
5:40 PM it's okay if you don't, or don't yet! I'm always around (:
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Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2026 8:38 pm
5:45 PM
i'm a ray of sunshine 24/7 call me mr arctic circle summer
5:46 PM
you know anything about those magic fleas or whatever they are? joy's ignoring my texts.
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Posted: Sun Jan 11, 2026 6:35 am
Blarney
5:47 PM If I had a way of changing your contact info on this thing, I would absolutely change it to mr arctic circle summer. Blarney
5:51 PM Wait, what about magical fleas??
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