Nenjii
am I wrong for feeling this way
Absolutely not. I completely agree with supporting your SO and allowing them to come out on their own terms, but that should end at home. If he really wants to hang around them but doesn't want them to know you're gay then he needs to do it elsewhere.
I can understand keeping things hush-hush around family. Not many people could handle rejection from their loved ones, so they prolong coming out to them as long as possible. The way I look at things is that he is being selfish. He would rather have you be uncomfortable in your own home than to make a couple of strangers possibly uncomfortable. That's ridiculous.
Hell, I can even understand him not wanting to be out at school or to these people, but not at home. Let him be pissy about it, but my advice to you is to stand your ground. If you feel that strongly about it then tell him that this is the one thing you absolutely will not budge about because he's being selfish. Love is about making compromises, for sure, but not to this extent.
My mom tried to do this with me a few years back. At my birthday party in our home apparently, my grandpa made a face when my husband showed me affection. My mom asked me if I would try to not do that in front of him and I told her that I absolutely would not agree to that. This is my home, I live here not him. If he doesn't like what I do in
my home then he is welcomed to not come there.
At that point, my husband and I were already married and so was my sister, so I asked my mom, "Would you ask my sister and her husband to do the same thing if it bothered Grandpa?" She admitted she wouldn't, and although she was upset at first she later apologized and agreed that it wasn't fair of her to ask that.
Also, you handled it well. Not me, I couldn't do it. I'm very petty because if my husband ever asked that of me, and it wasn't a safety concern, I would camp it out. I'd go full out drag and prance around the house. No, those days are over for me.
I'm sorry he's being so difficult, but just try to let him know how you feel. If he loves you he will understand that it's a ridiculous request and try to come to a compromise with you.
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