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 Posted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 9:01 pm
You are obligated to give family free rides to work. To ask for a few bucks a week is very rude. They are working to save up money and, even though you want to do the same, you have to assist them without asking for anything. Even though they are the one who took an application with no reliable transportation. Even though they are the ones who dumped their car off elsewhere and have mentioned no plans to fix it. How dare anyone ask family for a little gas from family when they just need the free transportation for a few months.
gaia_star Presented by Sarcasm. gaia_star
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Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 7:46 am
Aw, man. sad You mentioned it but it sounds worse than I thought. That's bull. I hate how people think just cause they are family they can walk all over you. She should at least be paying you, but either way it's an inconvenience. Can you try and get someone else involved to try and talk with her? I've asked my aunt to deal with my mom before. She likes to help and my mom wasn't listening to my side. Whole different thing, but it can help to have backup.
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Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 8:48 pm
I did. My mom said something and my other sister and my dad agreed. The problem is that her husband is backing her up (because he does not want to have to worry about taking her since he is working 2 jobs already). So now she feels like she is in the right since 1 person agrees with her. But these two are both in debt to others because they are not responsible with money which is not my problem. The price I was asking for gas was something she could make in less than 1 hour of working there. I just found out the reason her car broke down was not just poor luck. She never fixed and oil leak and neglected oil changes so her motor got screwed up. So SHE is the reason her car is damaged and she expects ME to help her at the drop of a hat because of it.
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Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 6:38 am
Good lord. I hate being up against a wall. I feel helpless in this situation and it even isn't happening to me. xD I just hate having no good advice for you. It sounds like she is selfish so she's always gonna see it her way. :/ My sister is the same way, and we haven't talked in a few years. xD She won't forgive me for trying to give her advice. She was posting really sexual stuff on Facebook at 15 and I told her it's not good because of all the family she has on there. It's been 3 years and she still won't forgive me. For trying to help. xD I thought that's what older sisters were for. Family is tough, is the hardest thing I've dealt with. To love someone who probably doesn't deserve it, to feel obligated, to miss someone even though they hurt you. Family to me is worse than any bad relationship. xD You can pack and move, find a new man or woman, get divorced.. but you can't change the blood in your veins to not be related to the blood of a family member. You're almost stuck with family for life. A family bond is such an amazing thing but it can so easily become a nightmare.
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Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 8:50 am
Yeah, she will probably never change. She is 30 and had to move her family back in because she is very poor at handling money. Her younger sister tries to help by providing rides to work for a few bucks a week and she thinks her baby sister deserves to carry her. I told her she can walk but she replied with she provides food in this house. 1) That is mostly my mom actually. 2) The food she provides is FREE through WIC. But yeah, she is really doing great pulling her weight and repaying the multiple debts she owns to people/college as a stay at home mom *sarcasm*. She wont even start potty training her son until she buys a fancy training potty that flushes. Guess she should not have spent hundreds on Keto and getting her nails professionally done. 1 excuse to not pay me for gas was that she had to save... When did that start exactly?! And yeah I do not now what I would do in your situation. I feel awkward when friends from high school share stuff like that and family doing it would be way too awkward for me to handle.
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Posted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 7:18 pm
Dang. She sounds really selfish. And I have had people use food stamps as a bargaining chip too. Dude, you didn't earn that, it takes you no effort. Worst part is just signing up and then you're done. And I doubt she's getting a whole lot from WIC. They provide the basics and only enough for the mom and child. That's ridiculous about the potty training. All they need is a smaller seat to go in the toilet you already have. Give em a step stool. Or the classic plastic potty. It's not like it needs to be luxurious. He isn't gonna be sitting on it for long periods of time, it isn't a couch. Man she's lucky I'm not her sister. xD A lot of people online never get to see my angry side, haha. And I don't put up with as much crap anymore. I started calling people out. I'd probably end up in a fist fight with her if she was my sister. xD If me and my sister were brought up together I can almost guarantee we would have physically fought. She gets even madder than I can, and her anger is irrational like my mom's. Add to that being spoiled your entire life. She got $500 and something else for Christmas when she was like 17 and she complained that she only got 1 "actual" present. If I had been there when she said that, I probably would have called her a B to her face. xD I know I would have said something, right there in front of everyone. But I lived in another state at the time. Why couldn't me and you switch out our sisters with each other? xD We could've had awesome sisters and they could've suffered each other, haha. I feel like this turned into the hate on sisters thread and it's my fault. xD She just reminds me of mine. And I have two brothers.. neither of them have really ever actually pissed me off. I was a little mad and sore at my younger brother for getting married without me knowing. xD But he lives in another state and it was last minute so I got over it. My brothers fight like crazy but always get along with me, haha. It's really weird when you think about it. In my situation it could be that me and my bros share the same dad where my sister is satan's I mean my mom's kid. xD
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Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 7:59 pm
Yeah, you cannot brag about helping with something you get for free when you are in debt to the person. She somewhat apologized but she claimed she was being sarcastic about not paying for gas. If you were in the car then you would be able to tell there was no sarcasm. And the fact that her husband randomly came in the argument saying the place was just down the road as though she had been venting previously to him about how she shouldn't have to pay anything. I made a point not to apologize back. We are kind of getting along now but I still do not intend to go out of my way for her again and I do not trust her. I have been debating lately on cutting her out of my life once I move out. This is the second feud we have had since she got here and it's only been about 2 months. I realize I only thought she was a charitable person who was wronged so many times because I have only ever heard her side of things. Now I see she is a hypocrite that expects things to be handed to her. I also wish you and I were sisters. Then we could play Dungeons and Dragons together lol.
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Posted: Fri Sep 15, 2017 7:26 pm
See now I'm reminded of my mom rather than my sister, haha. She will try to act like later on she wasn't mad earlier, or the same, she was joking or sarcastic. Hypocrite, big time. And I used to believe everything she said. This here is a real horror story I have of hers. She comes over to my house crying, telling me how a guy stole her money and raped her. My friend was there too. We got so upset. I think I cried but I can't remember. It was so emotional. She went and got the cops involved and even did a kit. Turns out, days later, I find out it didn't happen. She had consensual sex with this guy, then gave him money for pot and he never came back. So she makes that up cause you can't call the police for a bad drug deal. Bad enough, but why lie to us too and draw it out and be all dramatic? She says she didn't go through with it all.. but who even knows? I mean he was obviously a jerk but still. It's good she's gonna start paying you. And honestly, maybe you should cut her out. Or keep her at a very far distance. Make up reasons not to talk or hang out. I know it sounds terrible but you shouldn't have to be unhappy just cause you have blood relation. I like to think, if we weren't related would I talk to you? xD If the answer is no, I don't usually bother with them. With age I've gotten really selfish, haha. xD But why waste your possibly only life being upset? I want to have it all settled and figured out by 30. All the conflict. I have had to cut family out and the thing is I've never regretted that decision in the long run. I feel bad at first, then realize, I don't have someone breathing down my neck or telling me I'm not good enough. Then I have more time to focus on the people who are awesome like you. I could be wasting time right now talking to my sister or my mom but instead I'm replying to someone who's nice to me, haha. I dunno, maybe I'm bitter and my advice is horrible. xD But it's working for me so far. And yay you want to be my sister too. :3
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Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2017 11:40 am
And what's the problem with just not giving her the ride? Either she pays, she walks, or she finds someone else.
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Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2017 9:42 pm
She has not told me straight up that she would pay for gas yet though. She claimed she was mad because she thought I assumed she would not pay; yet she has not clearly stated that she will be paying for rides so far. It is just weird because we use to be so close before she moved in.
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Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2017 9:44 pm
Different...Very. And what's the problem with just not giving her the ride? Either she pays, she walks, or she finds someone else. Agreed. I have given her free rides to places before but that was just on occasion. When it will be multiple times a week, I am going to have to have money in return or I will be drained.
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Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2017 6:36 am
I don't like it when they do that. I would kick them out and not let them put you or someone in their place. I would not allow that.
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2017 8:07 pm
Have things gotten better with your sister? My mom has started randomly texting me so I just give her short but somewhat friendly responses. xD First it was an update that she still can't find a place. Next she ran into someone who wanted her to tell me "Hi." Then she texted about a guy who finally got charged for a crime we knew he committed. All things she didn't really need to tell me. xD Obviously she can't find a place or she would have came for her cat. I could care less about a "hi" from someone I have no contact details for. And the last thing is all over the news and social media. I think she's trying to trick me into being her friend again. xD Yeah, it's all fine and dandy now, but she's a ticking bomb and needs to stay at a reasonable distance from me.
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2017 8:57 pm
Things are kind of better I guess. I still think I will kind of distance myself from her when we no longer live together. There are a few things that happened since then that I don't want to post on here but it just showed that we are far too different. The negativity is not something I want to keep dealing with. Glad you are able to still maintain a decent distance from your mother so she cannot drag you down again smile
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2017 10:36 pm
Oh, man. Definitely can't be good if you don't even want to talk about it. I completely understand though. I'm sorry. sad But it's good things are kind of better rather than worse, haha. smile If you want to talk about it later I'm here. It's good that you want to distance yourself for you. You shouldn't sacrifice your own happiness for someone else. Temporarily, sure, depending on the situation, haha. But I've been there, just years of ups and downs. And one day you realize there's waay too many bad times compared to good. That's how it was for me anyway. I've had to let go of quite a few family and friends. Some just change or never were decent to begin with. A lot I kept around out of obligation. But screw that. I'd rather spend my time on awesome people.
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