Welcome to Gaia! ::

All Along the Watchtower: A DC Comics RP [O/A]

Back to Guilds

A Semi-Literate/ Literate Justice League Guild 

Tags: DC Comics, Roleplay, Literate, Superheroes, Justice League 

Reply Old Application Threads
Shay Baldwin// Red Hood Legacy// Anti-Hero// Pending Goto Page: 1 2 [>] [»|]

Quick Reply

Enter both words below, separated by a space:

Can't read the text? Click here

Submit

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100
PostPosted: Fri Dec 16, 2016 11:39 pm



Gaia username: Ghost_Rios
Wanted legacy/villain:
RP sample:
Shay was walking down the streets of Gotham, finishing his time in the gym. As he walked home he heard a commotion, but it wasn’t his problem. “Not my monkey, not my zoo…” He walked on until he could see the fight break out into the streets. Now it was his problem sadly. “Guy’s… just leave the kid alone, go home, warm up, and count your blessings. Close to Christmas gentlemen, good cheer and all that crap.” Dodging as he saw a fist swing by his face. “Okay, not cool.” Hunching over though as a swing came and landed in his stomach. Coughing as he tried to catch his breath he jumped shoved a guy into the wall. He began to swing wildly for a bit till he was encircled the gang of guys. They immediately all jumped on him. Using whatever he had left in the tank he broke free, sprinting as fast as he could through the warehouses. Finding one that looked safe he slipped in and moved against the far wall. Catching his breath he fell backwards as a wall fell in. After hitting his head on the floor he slowly got up. His eyes widening as he saw what was before him. The Red helmet on a pedestal told him everything… he found the old hideout of the Red Hood.
Are you a fan of the series, are you familiar with this character? Yes
Do you promise to be as active as possible if we grant you this privilege? Yes

 
PostPosted: Sat Dec 17, 2016 12:11 am


User Image
[General Information]

Name: Shay Baldwin
Nicknames: none
Titles: Red Hood
Age: 28
Birthday: November 6th
Star sign: Scorpio
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Alliance: Hero/Anti-Hero
Personality: Shay can be very militant about his beliefs. He's constantly thinking in terms of Strategy and Tactical advantages, the kind of person you may want on your side in fight. He is die hard in his belief that Gangsters should be put down like dogs, to which this belief makes him belligerent. But he is fiercely loyal as well as honorable, a real man of word. But he is not to be betrayed because if so he will hunt you down and you may find a hole the size of a fist in you. To those he is romancing he is kind and caring, usually will to rush to that persons aid if need be.


[Personal Information]

Height: 6'
Weight: 240lbs
Occupation: Ex-Marine, Bike/Car Mechanic, Boxer
Sexuality: Straight
Likes: Cars, Motorcycle, Guns, Working out, Boxing.
Dreams: Own his own mechanic shop
Dislikes: Blue Berries, Gangsters, Fixing small parts, disrespectful people
Fears: Dying, killing an innocent person
Darkest Secret: He was dishonorably discharged
Favourite Food: Pizza
Favourite Drink: Cream Soda
Least Favourite Food: Blue Berries
Least Favourite Drink: Beer
Loyalties: Anyone in the Bat Family
Intelligence Level: Mostly Street smarts, Basic Training in the Marines, and a little bit of schooling from Citadel University
Dominant Hand: ambidextrous
Strengths: Shooting, Driving, Boxing
Weaknesses: Interacting with others, taking orders, working as a team

Cherished Items:
-Dog tags: Besides his own from his time in the service he also carries the Dog Tags of his best friend who died in his arms during a firefight.

-Pocket Watch: He has his fathers pocket watch, given to him before his Father died in a fire..

Philosophical/social viewpoint: He believes all innocent lives are worth saving, also believes that all Gangsters should be put down like dogs. He believes in stronger police but that every man has the right bear arms.

Religious viewpoint: Believes in a God. Not sure if God cares for humanity though. In short he's like any other Christian.

Romantic viewpoint: It'll come when it comes


Biography


Shay lived in the roughest slums of Gotham, often using the streets as an outlet, creating at a very young age a sense of recklessness within him. This often resulted in the male being pulled into a lot of trouble more often than not, especially with the thugs that often roamed. One of these altercations instilled fear into his parents so much that they decided that he needed to learn how to defend himself in the efforts they were not around to keep him safe. With the open public gyms, they allowed him to receive training, from boxing to exercising. This made something spike within his body, some form of aggression that allowed him to take great joy in hurting others, particularly those he thought that prided themselves in strength to claim they were the best. It made him haughty that he took it from the ring out to the streets again, a place he thought he could make easy cash to help support his family, where another lesson of reality smacked him hard; he fought against an opponent who utilized more than just boxing, Falcone’s proud son himself, Mario laying down the blows to the young teen.

How would he compensate? This was a crime lord’s son and the cash he put on the line for such a reckless fight was nowhere enough. Mario had an idea, something that Shay would regret the rest of his life. His family’s garage was lit ablaze one night and his parents were taken within it that very night. Shay became an orphan at the age of fifteen, where he was taken in by a close, but distant aunt in a much more safer area within Gotham and for obvious reasons too. His deceased grandmother cut his mother from the family when she chose “this sleeze of a man” for her husband. Living with his aunt was a bit tough. Through here, he was afforded proper education and introduced to a supreme being known as God, his aunt a devout Christian who helped bring the youth to seeking repentance for his actions.

For schooling, Shay attended the usual PS (Public Schools) within Gotham, particularly PS 118. It had some slight militaristic roles to it, something his aunt believed would make him a proper man, which fueled his mind with the notion that maybe he should enlist as he got older. He held that in high regards when he took notice of the criminal activities going on around him, the male personally wishing there was something he could do, but what could he do was the point? Gotham was gloomy and depressing as it would ever be. It was probably for the better that he got called to duty immediately after graduating from High School. He could not stand to be there any further, for both his memories and his aunt would have made him snap.

Like most, he was 19 by the time it came to Basic Training and that was hell. Thanks to some of the regiment he learned back at PS 118, he had some kind of training that made him just a little better than the others, which made him feel great right as he was being drilled like the others. That was saying much though. He was taught the roughest of trainings, from strict dieting to just scarf down anything all the way to bobbing in the water to build breath timing and endurance. Gone was he from the scrawny male that entered to what could be called a young man, buffer and stronger both mentally and physically as nobody wanted a Jarhead holding a rifle that would determine whose life was saved on the battlefield. None of the training could prepare him for what was to come next though.

He was a year into service and on tour when the attack hit. Shay and his company were patrolling the streets on their way back to the base when the Taliban attacked. Their makeshift molotovs were just the distraction as Shay soon realized, his scope providing cover from afar. A male teen had emerged out of the assault, a grenade fresh in hand. Shay yelled out to him to put it down. He refused to kill someone so young, but just like him, this kid was fixed on his moral ways. Shay commanded for him to do so again, but this time the pin was pulled and he was out of options. The round fired and echoed throughout the road. The kid was killed right through the head and the resulting explosion from the grenade sent the building he was on top of tumbling down from reckless stalling.

When he was found, he was disillusioned, sorry for what had occurred, helpless just like he was when he was a kid. His eyes were wandering, but he was not there so to say as he mumbled over and over again “I told him to stop.” Debriefing helped, but Shay was took shaken up. There was no other choice but to send him back to America with a discharge.

He had problems adjusting, his ears tuned to the noises of war and slight pops causing him to be shellshocked. His aunt was ready to write him off to some Asylum, Arkham in fact when his eyes opened to a revelation that had him visit his old home with the garage. It was slowly being repaired as nobody else had plans to take the space and now an adult, he had time to share a drink and take away his pains one sip at a time. It was here they noticed him as they were driving down the road in a pickup truck like paramilitant groups, complete with guns in their hands. Not everyone wore the same mask, but the bandanas, domino masks and red hoodies pointed out they belonged to the Red Hood Gang.

He was persuaded like everybody else, from youth to adult that could fight: The Red Hood Gang would bring crime to an effective halt. Why be Batman when he could go to a cause that ended the reign of Falcone once and for all. He had skills that was going to waste, something they reminded him by calling him Mr. Marine when he spoke with them. He could save lives, he thought. Put an end to the man that started it all for him. Kill Mario Falcone and spare Gotham pain. His thoughts were falsely proven through his two year career, the male casting aside his Aunt for his own beliefs, this of which she screamed “Devil!”

Being gone, he had no idea how this Gang rose up through the ranks, enough to know they were not saints themselves. Traveling with them on their numerous crusades, he naturally assumed that they were doing these things just like the military. He learned how expendable him and some of the lesser gang members were however when they came against the very thugs who caused him pain in the first place. There he was, Mario Falcone. The very man hardly seemed to have aged a day, now a Doctor at Gotham’s finest hospital, but still crooked all the same with just a slight premature graying to the sides of his black hair. Shay recklessly fired when the deal went south from Falcone wanting to see the Hoods just dead. He put his Marine expertise to use, killing from a blind fury, but it was a very similar situation that caused his eyes to open. One of the Red Hood members was a teen and he was shot, but not to a point where he would die. It was none of Falcone’s men who delivered the fatal shot to him however.

They saw him as a liability by being wounded and he could not hinder them. They pulled the trigger straight through his skull even though he insisted he would be alright. The young male was dead, but Shay was promoted from a bandana and hoodie to a sleek red mask. It did not feel great though, which triggered something else within his mind even further.

He wandered around again, prayed for the road he would take, but he found no cure to his solution. People got away with whatever they wanted over and over again. He spent his time brooding. Calculating and brooding, particularly over the Red Mask he had just received. Enough was enough. He would take actions into his own hands.

Gotham believed in heroes. They found their faith in the Dark Knight and the Boy Wonder. They found courage in Nightwing and Batgirl. Shay took this symbol and painted it crimson red on his shirt. The Red Hood Gang was too much to take out in one go. No, he would do what was necessary and cripple them. Being a part of their gang for years, he knew their locations and how to strike effectively. With a crimson hoodie drawn over the red mask, he made his move when the gang returned to the falsely painted abandoned facility for shipment. To the youth, he put them out of commission from a gang career, striking fear into their hearts just like Batman. To the adults however, they were set into their ways and no mercy would be spared for them. The facility went up in flames. A new Red Hood, a legacy to Jason Todd, was born.

Every gang, from the Red Hoods right down to Joker himself better beware. His motives were clear. Criminals lacked conviction. He would give it to them one bullet through the head at a time.






[Relationship information]

Friends:
Character name as URL link | Alliance | Relationship type
Relationship explanation

Enemies:
Character name as URL link | Alliance | Relationship type
Relationship explanation

Family:
Character name as URL link | Alliance | Relationship type
Relationship explanation

Romantic Relationships:
Character name as URL link | Alliance | Relationship type
Relationship explanation




[Weapon information]

Dual Custom Desert Eagles: Equiped with hair-triggers so they'll fire faster these pistols come with a few special treats such as; an extended magazine upgrading the weapon to hold twenty shots in total, Gas vents that help reduce the recoil, iron sights with glowing paint so no matter what you can aim better at your target.

Barret .50 Cal Sniper: The standard high powered weapon is a tool for choice to take down any vehicle. It has the standard four shot magazine before a reload is required. The weapon can, in proper hands, easily shoot up to a mile, which is a difficult shot for any armature shooter. Also having a standard sight you can see up to a mile clearly. The down side is the recoil can really mess up the shoulder if one doesn't know how to properly fire the weapon.

K-Bar Knife: The favorite steel knife of the United States Marine Corps. This ten inch long blade is a must for survival. Perfectly balanced and sharp enough to cut through flesh. After so many uses this knife will need to be sharpened again. No knife, not even the K-Bar, is infinitely sharp.

Claymore Mines: A must for any trap if that is your intention. This directional explosive can be set up in three ways. 1) A trip wire, a classic trap style but the wire may be missed when an enemy steps over or spots. 2) Detenation, hooking up a detonator to the mine you can activate anywhere within a hundred yards. But if the detonator breaks or an emp goes off or even a signal jammer is set up the explosive is rendered useless. 3) Proximity, one of the most dangerous to set up. Giving an area within a three foot range this weapon may go off, though anything trips it and it will go off. Loss of power or signal will render it as useless as a detonation mine.




[Other item information]

Red Hood Costume: Through contacts because of his time in the Marines the outfit is made from a leather jacket, AR 500 body plates molded to fit him. The plates can stop a NATO round, with two layers, but as a single lay Assault Rifle rounds will break skin. The plates will not however stop explosives. He'll be fine on taking a 9mm round but anything bigger he will react to the impact force.

Red Hood Helmet: The helmet comes with three basic systems. A basic gas mask to filter out most known toxins, a communications head set to coordinate with a team or even just the watch tower, and three basic lenses such as night vision, normal vision, and shades. The visions work based on voice commands, if not said in time a flash bang can stun the wearer. The gas mask can handle up to Scarecrows mildest gas and a mild dose of Jokers laughing Gas.

1967 Chevrolet Impala : This four door hard top is a classic car. Housing under it's hood a Turbo-Jet V8 engine. The classic Impala is a resto-mod (restoration-modified) to make the vehicle faster and have better gas mileage. Though it won't keep up with the Batmoble it can keep pace with any modded street car and out run any cop car. Just like the Batmoble parts of the Impala is armored to stop small arms fire such as; Handguns, Shotguns, and assault rifles.

Grappling hook gun: Much like the Dark Knight this tool, with roughly a hundred feet of cable allows the user co climb easier or swing across the streets. It does have a weight limit, 450 pounds total, before the cable will break. So try not to catch cars with it. It is retractable to allow the user to either climb or for reuse.



[Ability information]


Climbing: IMPROVISE, ADAPT, OVERCOME! The Marine Corp motto when it comes to fighting. And in doing so Shay had to learn how to climb free hand. He cannot scale a tall building, but there is no fence or wall he can't climb or even a single story house. And if the retracting motor on his grappling gun dies he can climb the rope. Still being human too much climbing will drain him of stamina.

Acrobatics: Noticing his lack of speed and balance Shay began the process of learning acrobatics. After thousands of hours of practicing he got to the point where he can catch his balance, jump over an obstacle, or even do a flip to try to get around an enemy. Though in peak physical condition he can do a great deal of flips but he will tire like anyone else since he is moving so much mass. He still practices all the balancing aspects daily and rotates between jumps and flips.

Marksmenship: Spending many hours at the range Shay has been registered as a marksmen. To develope this skill he has spent over a thousand hours and close to a million rounds of ammo to perfect his shooting techniques. Though he doesn't have the resources like the Marines did, he maintains two hours and a hundred rounds a week.

Precision driving: As much as he loves to drive he cannot hit everything and keep repairing his vehicle so easily. In order to become a better driver he would set up various tracks and drive, learning how to drift so when turning he doesn't crash into everything or lose so much speed. He also practiced with various obstacles so if need be he can follow bad guys and avoid hazards. But like any human driver he will need to be careful on ice or even in the rain if he loses control of his tires and spins out.

Close-Quarters Combat: Through classes at Basic training and boxing as a youth he has developed himself as a fighter. When ammunition runs out or an enemy is two close Shay will use whatever he can to defend himself. Through experience and training he can fight just about anyone below a professional fighter and win. As he is still human and will make poor calls in a fight, he can still get hit just like anyone else.



[Weakness information]


Mortality: He can die just like anyone else.

 

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100

Klayko
Crew

Blessed Tactician

PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2016 9:30 pm


Ghost_Rios




Okie dokie, this will be here to address some more of the kinks within this bio that really do not explain much ado about anything

Quote:

One night as he walked from a match against some guy he was jumped. Fighting off the best he could he ran, dodging through the warehouses. As he entered a warehouse he went against the wall, scooting by as he hid from the gangsters.


The English Major in me is just screaming lividly. Why, do you ask? At no point do you make it obvious they were gangsters. These just sound like typical muggers and might I add, would make a lot more sense. Gangsters belong to an organization to someone like the Kingpins known as Two-Face and Penguin? If they are also muggers, he also knows how to handle himself, which would negate a Red Hood (Jason Todd) ever having to appear.

That in turn also creates another situation: Jason would not waste his time on people like this. Remember, Joker killed him. Jason is out for revenge against criminals of this mad man's level, which include Bane, Penguin, Two-Face and so forth. He wouldn't waste time on some small timer muggers nor gangsters in this case if they cannot give him answers he's looking for. Nightwing, Red Robin or the likes would most likely handle this than he would. Todd is after all the Black Sheep and the one whose fire is out for certain people. That means this and the article will have to go because it's just not plausible.

Suggestion: Given how your character reads, most likely he would start his own form of vigilante justice. Could be he winds up as a deal with said figures if you're that serious about wanting to see the man in Red himself and Jason crashes the party, kills some henchmen and leaves the person before him (Shay, that is) in some kind of shock. He wouldn't know Red Hood vanished, so when Red Hood gang goes on their typical tirades, he might think this is the same group and joins up with them (That part is actually decent on your profile, mostly). Unfortunately, I cannot come up with these for you as I don't know what it is you want. You're going to have to piece what you can from this suggestion because whatever occurs, remember that it is Bruce Wayne that cause the Legacy Initiative to spur, so it will have to be a reason why he would be Red Hood's Legacy. Dig deep and conjure something for this bio that will not only make sense, but also connect with each paragraph properly.
PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2016 10:02 pm


Edited, hoping I included everything.  

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100

The Master Time Lord
Captain

Malevolent Firestarter

14,200 Points
  • Wintersday Bard 50
  • Advent Attendee 50
  • Demonic Associate 100
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 2:36 pm


Ghost_Rios


Okay, wow, let's take a look at this shall we? Keep in mind as I pick apart your bio, that I'm not going to give you suggestions on how to change what is wrong. I'm going to tell you the problems I see with it and let you fix the problems on your own, because I know that mods have given you suggestions and you haven't seemed to accept them.

Quote:
Shay grew up on the streets of Gotham. His family didn’t have much but gave what they could.

Do you realize when you say 'he grew up on the streets' you mean he was homeless? You immediately follow this by saying that his father took him to the gym every day. If you actually meant he was homeless, how did his family have enough to buy a constant gym membership but not enough for a house? If you didn't mean they were homeless, you can't say he grew up on the streets.

Quote:
Shay would see the gangsters, knowing the things they did, and wanted to see them dead. One time he saw a kid getting jumped, Shay tried to help but he couldn’t take on three guys at once.

I'm not sure what kid in, what, middle school? looks at anyone and seriously thinks 'I want them dead'. I mean I know kids are kinda temperamental and think those kinds of things a lot, but they also never actually mean them. Also, how did he try to help? What happened? Was he just casually pushed aside or did he land in the hospital? What was the result of him trying to help?

Quote:
To further his education Shay took the jump and went to Citadel for Mechanics and Mechanical engineering, an education he thought he could use to help his family.

Quote:
His parents though sent him to work in the family Garage.

This is the only suggestion I'm going to give. These two statements are linked, but you have them so far apart on the bio that they seem random. You need to state earlier on that his family owns a garage, so that it flows together and makes more sense.

Quote:
As his spotter was packing to leave Shay spotted a child near one of the dead men. He could see the RPG in the dead mans hands. In his mind he kept saying over and over; "Please don't pick it up, please don't pick it up". Witnessing the child lift the weapon he fired. He didn't watch the child go down as he turned and threw up. He had killed a child, an innocent child. Something about that just broke him, he couldn't explain it.

First of all, what was a kid doing on an active battlefield? Secondly, a standard RPG weighs almost 20lbs. How could a kid pick up a weapon over a quarter of it's own weight? I've seen kids complain about having to lift/carry things that are 5lbs. Additionally, why did Shay fire so quickly? He had no idea what the kid was going to do with it. If it was an innocent child, it probably wouldn't have fired the gun anyway(would've had a hell of a time doing it anyway, RPGs give a lot of kickback, probably would have killed him/herself in the process) so Shay needlessly killed an innocent child. If it was a child soldier, the kid wasn't innocent. Shay didn't struggle to pull the trigger, but he threw up afterward. And he's christian, but he didn't pray for forgiveness for killing the kid? He got no PTSD or nightmares or anything of the sort from killing the kid. In fact, it's not mentioned again until the bank heist several paragraphs later.

Quote:
One night as he walked from a match against some guy he was jumped by some guys dressed as clowns, the Joker's gang.

Why did Joker's gang attack him? As far as I'm aware they don't just attack random people off the street? What purpose does attacking him serve?

Quote:
Fighting them off the best he could he ran, running through the warehouses. As he entered a warehouse he went against the wall, scooting by as he hid from the gangsters.

As he thought he was about to die he saw a movement that was faster than anything he knew. Stepping out from his hiding spot he saw all the Men chasing him were dead. He went home, a few days later he turned on the news. The title was "Red Hood Strikes again!" The paper described the scene. It was exactly how he saw it after it had happened. The reporter said;

A few days ago members of the Joker's Gang were found dead in a warehouse. Sources say that they were chasing something. Though eye witness can't confirm what the men were chasing. But witnesses did hear several gun shots. As police rolled up to the scene the to find the bodies of the notorious gang. Officers say that bullet wounds match the vigilante that they call Red Hood....

How long was he fighting them off? Where did he hide? How long was he hiding? How did the news know it was Red Hood? You can't identify a killer by gunshot wounds. I'm not sure what Jason would have been doing there to begin with. Was something bigger happening in the warehouses that Jason would be in that area for? Why would the news not cover that instead of a couple of gang deaths? This part doesn't add up much at all.

Quote:
But when the Heroes vanished so did the Red Hood and without men like that, gangs rose up to run the streets.

How did he know Red Hood vanished? Red Hood is, essentially, a ghost. It's really hard to track him, especially for civilians. It would be some time before anyone realized he disappeared with the rest of the heroes.

Quote:
Thinking about it he decided to join up. At first he didn't think anything bad, he was cleaning up the streets.

How did he join? How old was he when he joined? How long after the disappearance of the heroes did he join?

Quote:
The crowd control had gotten boring, he began to walk around. Reassuring the people that if they stayed still they would be safe. As the heist drew to an end he waved for his fellow Hoodies to get out. As the others left he was headed towards the door. Out of the corner he saw the man in charge of the crowd control fire. Spinning on his heels it was then he saw what had happened. A innocent child was shot. When he got home he vomited as the thought haunted him. Much like what happened in the Middle East.

Okay, why did he get bored? He's robbing a bank, holding an entire crowd of people hostage and holding a gun. Also why did he signal for everyone to leave if he wasn't the one in charge? And why did the one in charge shoot the child? Everyone was leaving, why bother shooting one of the hostages now?
Additionally, how long was he part of the gang before this happened? How long did it take him to realize he was in with the wrong group?

Quote:
He began to attack the gang from the inside, sabotaging jobs, tipping the cops to heists. He would mess with drills by making them dull with a file. With guns he took out the firing pins or would crimp the first bullet. Explosives he would rig the charges to go off in an instant. It wasn't easy to do, anything he did had to be subtle, and stealthed. He kept this up until he There was only a few left. As the gang numbers dropped a meeting was called; all the remaining Hoodies.

How long did this go on, his setting them up for failure? How did they not realize someone was messing with them pretty early on? Like, they could chalk up the first few failed jobs off to bad luck, or the guns to a bad dealer, but things starting to go wrong every time, they would realize they had a mole, and actively hunt said mole down. Why did they wait and let their numbers dwindle? Why didn't they hire more people to keep the gang strong?

Quote:
As he received the details he began to make plans. He would place explosives on the cars and gun them all down. On the night of the meeting he did as planned, making sure he was the last to arrive. Placing the explosives with a five minute timer her went inside. His gun of choice was a compact AK-47. All he needed to do was wait, wait for the explosives and wait for the panic. When the bombs went off he drew his gun, firing and emptying the magazine into the last of the Red Hood Gang.

Why go through all that trouble, and risk failure? If they were normal civilians, explosions would make them panic. These are full fledged gang members, explosions would only put them on alert and make them draw their weapons. He'd be gunned down as soon as he fired his first shot. If he knew where they were meeting ahead of time, he didn't even have to wait for them to get in, he could have set up their death before they even arrived.

Edit: I forgot to add, Shay's age doesn't add up with our time line. For him to be 23 now, he would've had to be 18 when the heroes disappeared, but you stated he was still in the military at 18. You'll have to readjust his age.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 6:01 pm


The Master Time Lord


Reworked. Hope it's good.

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100

The Master Time Lord
Captain

Malevolent Firestarter

14,200 Points
  • Wintersday Bard 50
  • Advent Attendee 50
  • Demonic Associate 100
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 7:45 pm


Ghost_Rios

Alright, bio is looking a lot better. I approve of your usage of the Red Hood gang and his choice to use their own name against them.

I noticed, though, that you have under cherished items, a pocket watch he got from his father before he died of a cocaine overdose, but according to the bio he died in a fire. You'll have to pick one and stick with it.

I would just like to also point out that if you want to explain how the smoke pellet works, you probably should have googled how a smoke bomb works. Check this link, up to you if you want to copy the components or just remove your description of what's inside the pellet. Regardless, a four feet radius is actually really small. You'll want something more like 12-20 feet, something that can fill up a whole room.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 7:49 pm


The Master Time Lord
Ghost_Rios

Alright, bio is looking a lot better. I approve of your usage of the Red Hood gang and his choice to use their own name against them.

I noticed, though, that you have under cherished items, a pocket watch he got from his father before he died of a cocaine overdose, but according to the bio he died in a fire. You'll have to pick one and stick with it.

I would just like to also point out that if you want to explain how the smoke pellet works, you probably should have googled how a smoke bomb works. Check this link, up to you if you want to copy the components or just remove your description of what's inside the pellet. Regardless, a four feet radius is actually really small. You'll want something more like 12-20 feet, something that can fill up a whole room.


My bad. Chose the Fire. And decided to drop the smoke bomb.

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100

The Master Time Lord
Captain

Malevolent Firestarter

14,200 Points
  • Wintersday Bard 50
  • Advent Attendee 50
  • Demonic Associate 100
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 8:32 pm


Ghost_Rios
My bad. Chose the Fire. And decided to drop the smoke bomb.

Why'd you drop the smoke bomb?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 8:41 pm


The Master Time Lord
Ghost_Rios
My bad. Chose the Fire. And decided to drop the smoke bomb.

Why'd you drop the smoke bomb?


I thought about it for a bit and I felt didn't exactly fit  

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100

The Master Time Lord
Captain

Malevolent Firestarter

14,200 Points
  • Wintersday Bard 50
  • Advent Attendee 50
  • Demonic Associate 100
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 8:47 pm


Ghost_Rios
I thought about it for a bit and I felt didn't exactly fit


How not?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 8:52 pm


The Master Time Lord
Ghost_Rios
I thought about it for a bit and I felt didn't exactly fit


How not?


Stealth is a big part of the Red Hood and I didn't see him using it much in the future. Plus the link just said how it was made.

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100

The Master Time Lord
Captain

Malevolent Firestarter

14,200 Points
  • Wintersday Bard 50
  • Advent Attendee 50
  • Demonic Associate 100
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 9:02 pm


Ghost_Rios
Stealth is a big part of the Red Hood and I didn't see him using it much in the future. Plus the link just said how it was made.

Okay, alright, let's take a step back. I think we're thinking of different kinds of smoke pellets here. When I think of smoke pellets, I think of the kind you would see in the Arkham games, where Batman throws one down and it covers a whole group of people. I think the ones you're thinking of are the smaller grade or the kind you see ninjas or w/e use where they drop one and have disappeared before the smoke clears. Either way, whichever one you want to use, they are both capable of stealth purposes, if used right. And I only included the link because you had an incorrect description of what a smoke pellet was, and I wanted to help you be more accurate. If you don't want to have a description of the smoke pellets, you can leave it out, it's no skin off my teeth. You don't have to drop the pellets completely.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 9:05 pm


The Master Time Lord

Okay, alright, let's take a step back. I think we're thinking of different kinds of smoke pellets here. When I think of smoke pellets, I think of the kind you would see in the Arkham games, where Batman throws one down and it covers a whole group of people. I think the ones you're thinking of are the smaller grade or the kind you see ninjas or w/e use where they drop one and have disappeared before the smoke clears. Either way, whichever one you want to use, they are both capable of stealth purposes, if used right. And I only included the link because you had an incorrect description of what a smoke pellet was, and I wanted to help you be more accurate. If you don't want to have a description of the smoke pellets, you can leave it out, it's no skin off my teeth. You don't have to drop the pellets completely.


Yeah. I think we were thinking of completely different things. But I really couldn't see him using it much.

Ghost_Rios

Dangerous Husband

10,600 Points
  • Survivor 150
  • Battle: Rogue 100
  • Married 100

The Master Time Lord
Captain

Malevolent Firestarter

14,200 Points
  • Wintersday Bard 50
  • Advent Attendee 50
  • Demonic Associate 100
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 9:12 pm


Ghost_Rios
Yeah. I think we were thinking of completely different things. But I really couldn't see him using it much.

Alright, at least we were finally on the same page.

Well, now that that's behind us, you have my approval. You'll need a second mod approval before you can start posting.
Reply
Old Application Threads

Goto Page: 1 2 [>] [»|]
 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Mini-Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum
//
//

// //

Have an account? Login Now!

//
//