Breathe in.
Breathe out.
That's it.
Just one more hit and it would all be over. All the sweating and all the pain, all the nightmares and all the voices.
Tap the arm, make the vein pop out, covered in as many holes like a knitted blanket.
This was why you resided to wearing long sleeves, constantly, and even if you wore short sleeves, you always had a jacket on. You couldn't let others know. Couldn't let them see. This was your secret and you had to keep it that way. Away from your parents, away from your uncle that only wished the best for you. Away from the school body and teachers that you knew could see the way you were declining into a different state. Your grades were dropping, your mind scattering to places that you didn't know where until the loud bell of the class ending would shake you from your thoughts. Eating was hard now. You didn't want to eat, and you were losing weight far more rapidly than you thought, but it was okay. It didn't matter anyway. You could become skinny as a tree or disregarding your entire appearance and you'd still be the most popular boy in school.
You couldn't even make eye contact with Darren, the man you loved. You couldn't even bring yourself to ride around or go to your clubs anymore, and you were constantly snapping at those you had deemed close to you. Your life was a mess and you couldn't stop. You couldn't stop huddling in the corner of your kitchen after a long day and shooting up, letting that rush hit you and your pupils constrict. Speaking of...
Push the needle in and push down.
Let the drug enter your body as you take in a sharp breath. And just like that it made the voices stop, the pain stop.. Everything felt normal again.. It was almost like magic.
A small laugh echoed in the empty mansion as you relaxed against the wall, head back as you closed your eyes. This was fine. As long as you got to see his face when you closed your eyes, too, you'd be fine with that. Nothing really mattered after that party. Nothing really mattered after you accompanied him and you ended up falling into this train wreck of a pit called 'heroin addiction'. It was so simple, something you were sure to do just once, but then it became a need, a need to do so much more, to have it constantly flow into you and give you such a rush of feelings and emotions. It gave you life and that was what you needed more than anything. You needed this excitement in a life where nobody gave you any, where everything was handed to you on a silver platter. Nobody ever blinked an eye at you. The only people that gave a s**t about you were your parents, and they only cared to save face for them. As long as the good name 'Evans' was stain free, they could care less.
That would explain why they're not here, as per usual. They were always gone on "vacations" or "business trips," when really, they just didn't care enough to stay in the home with you, or in this boring town. Why they decided to settle down, you would never know. But it was fine.
It gave you the time to do this. It gave you the time to be someone that your parents would be disgusted in, and that thought made you laugh once again. Imagining the look of disgust at their star child...
And your brother.. what would he think? Using this opportunity to kick you off the pedestal of "Big Brother Can Do No Wrong" would be entirely fitting for him to do and for him to be the "star child" of the Evans family.. He'd want that. And right now, you wouldn't stop him. You didn't want to be on that pedestal, you just wanted to be a normal kid about to enter college.
A normal kid that was addicted to heroin, laughing to himself in the corner of his kitchen.
Breathe out.
That's it.
Just one more hit and it would all be over. All the sweating and all the pain, all the nightmares and all the voices.
Tap the arm, make the vein pop out, covered in as many holes like a knitted blanket.
This was why you resided to wearing long sleeves, constantly, and even if you wore short sleeves, you always had a jacket on. You couldn't let others know. Couldn't let them see. This was your secret and you had to keep it that way. Away from your parents, away from your uncle that only wished the best for you. Away from the school body and teachers that you knew could see the way you were declining into a different state. Your grades were dropping, your mind scattering to places that you didn't know where until the loud bell of the class ending would shake you from your thoughts. Eating was hard now. You didn't want to eat, and you were losing weight far more rapidly than you thought, but it was okay. It didn't matter anyway. You could become skinny as a tree or disregarding your entire appearance and you'd still be the most popular boy in school.
You couldn't even make eye contact with Darren, the man you loved. You couldn't even bring yourself to ride around or go to your clubs anymore, and you were constantly snapping at those you had deemed close to you. Your life was a mess and you couldn't stop. You couldn't stop huddling in the corner of your kitchen after a long day and shooting up, letting that rush hit you and your pupils constrict. Speaking of...
Push the needle in and push down.
Let the drug enter your body as you take in a sharp breath. And just like that it made the voices stop, the pain stop.. Everything felt normal again.. It was almost like magic.
A small laugh echoed in the empty mansion as you relaxed against the wall, head back as you closed your eyes. This was fine. As long as you got to see his face when you closed your eyes, too, you'd be fine with that. Nothing really mattered after that party. Nothing really mattered after you accompanied him and you ended up falling into this train wreck of a pit called 'heroin addiction'. It was so simple, something you were sure to do just once, but then it became a need, a need to do so much more, to have it constantly flow into you and give you such a rush of feelings and emotions. It gave you life and that was what you needed more than anything. You needed this excitement in a life where nobody gave you any, where everything was handed to you on a silver platter. Nobody ever blinked an eye at you. The only people that gave a s**t about you were your parents, and they only cared to save face for them. As long as the good name 'Evans' was stain free, they could care less.
That would explain why they're not here, as per usual. They were always gone on "vacations" or "business trips," when really, they just didn't care enough to stay in the home with you, or in this boring town. Why they decided to settle down, you would never know. But it was fine.
It gave you the time to do this. It gave you the time to be someone that your parents would be disgusted in, and that thought made you laugh once again. Imagining the look of disgust at their star child...
And your brother.. what would he think? Using this opportunity to kick you off the pedestal of "Big Brother Can Do No Wrong" would be entirely fitting for him to do and for him to be the "star child" of the Evans family.. He'd want that. And right now, you wouldn't stop him. You didn't want to be on that pedestal, you just wanted to be a normal kid about to enter college.
A normal kid that was addicted to heroin, laughing to himself in the corner of his kitchen.
