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Ahlyss
Crew

Noble Shade

PostPosted: Tue Mar 08, 2016 12:59 am


|| ♫ ||

Looking at you now..
The air is still around us; mid-summer, and the sun is low. Warm, and I still feel frozen, watching your face and seeing you like it's the first time I've ever seen you. Losing you has always been a possibility. We've never lived very safely, but I always knew in the back of my mind that the Gods held us in favor, and somehow let myself fall into this security...where I thought I'd always wake up to you. To this face, and those beautiful green eyes.

You're usually so snarky, too. Always something bitchy to say, just to get me to smile, but you don't say anything... You can't speak, either. You just stare back at me, and I waver a bit. My face cracks, and I can feel it...

This is the last lifetime I'll be allowed by your side. I've already been given so much, but... Even after rising from Hell itself to stay by your side...

Angels don't live forever. I knew that.
I traded eternity for time by your side, and it was entirely worth it.

...but I had no idea who you were.

The son of Ezra. A God. Your lifetime would far outspan my own... And as hard as I tried to reason with myself that I truly could have lost you in one way or another at any given time during our many, many relationships, and lifetimes together, this was truly the only time I ever really understood the feeling of loss.

"Loic," I say softly, only half hearing myself even say it out loud. I know what you'll do when I go. You'll put me someplace nice, and probably never visit. Talk about me a lot to the kids we have that don't hate us, and... I know you'll miss me, but I worry that it's selfish I want you to. I want you to miss me like I would miss you. There's no doubt about who I am to you, and that you'll miss me...but I wonder your level of distress.

Humanity had taken away the place we met, but after all the fighting, most of the land was left to reclaim itself, and here it was that we chose to spend most of our time together. The treeless hill. It almost felt empty. Would you visit this place after this lifetime was over? I smile at you, and rest my forehead against yours, sighing, "What you must be thinking in that head of yours right now.. I knew you were special, but I had no idea you were special to everyone else." I looked into your eyes as if I were searching for something. Something beside that childish fire that claimed me, and said you'd never let this happen. Deeper than the shell people could see, and more to the deepest depths people couldn't understand, to grasp how we'd been with each other since the dawn of our first lives. Deep where all those years we were held apart were still burned into our flesh, and... Suppose I wasn't really thinking clearly, "Loic... I want to be buried here. Give you a reason to keep coming back. So I won't be lonely."
PostPosted: Tue Mar 08, 2016 1:12 am


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I don't know what to say.
For the first time in a thousand years, I can't find a single world inside myself to speak to you. There are facts about this place that I take and store away in my mind for later, something I can focus on instead of feeling you next to me. To feeling what is left of you next to me. You've been slowly fading for years now, for the past few lifetimes and I can't even tell you how much I've been trying to find a way to keep you. All I'm told is that you gambled your own life away, that there's nothing left to give you and that he's sorry. He's so sorry. And he's not sorry about you leaving, no, he's sorry that I can't go, too. I can't tell you anything right now because nothing has felt real since we both found out what exactly I am.

I don't want to be special. I want to tell you that.

Mid-summer. Warm. Late sunset. The world is not the same as it was those thousands of years ago that we met. I remember every single detail from back then, I remember how much I hated you on sight. I remember that you kissed me first, that you broke the rules fist because we were both not what the other was expecting. Mid-summer. Warm. Late sunset. I want to yell at you for bringing me back here as if by some miracle, we could relive the first moments of our time together all over again.

But we can't.

"Don't," I rasp out, voice breaking around such a pitiful syllable. I can't think about you leaving me. I want to be selfish and keep you by my side forever, I had that for such a long time and it's wrong of you to not stay. I blame you. I blame him. I blame her. The Gods never held us in any favor, it was all on me. Whatever kind of power I had, it held us together for lifetime after lifetime. But it would never have been enough. There is not enough power in the world to save you, not after what you've sacrificed to stay this long. I curl my hands into fists, screwing my eyes shut so I don't have to look at your stupid face any longer. "Don't assume," I try again, hating my voice for betraying everything that I'm feeling right now. "That I have to come back to this place to remember you. That you need to leave some stupid tombstone to make me remember you. That I could forget anything about you. That I would make you feel alone even after you up and leave me here."

"Don't leave me here."

Ahlyss
Crew

Noble Shade

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