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Bro in Smuppet Land

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Bro: My name's Bro, and I have no idea where I am.
Someone just told me it's in the title, oh cool, my kind of place.

Luna: While traversing the glorious land of all that is plush and rump, Bro and the angry Shulks came across a field of......

Kanks: Rabid pants, snarling with their zippers fully down and legs flailing in the gale of -30 degree farenwhogivesashit con air conditioning.
They had grey paint stains on them, implying that the previous attendee had been adorning some form of alien cosplay.

Kampfer: Gamzee who had snuck out from under bros hat was hat was all like DaMn ******** where in ever loveing faygo tits are we

Luna: The rabid pants all turned their attention on Gamzee, Bro and the angry Shulks.

Bro: How long have you been in my hat. B(

Kampfer: remember when you a** on top of that big ol bootylishous puppet thing well i crawled under yo wicked sick sat when you werent ******** style="color: #626262">Karkat: WELL <********>, THESE JACKASSES ARE JUST <******** AGAIN.

Luna: And John arrived wearing a skirt.

Kanks: From the midst of the gigantic asscheeks of a huge inflatable smuppet bouncy castle came out Kankri, carrying a backpack stuffed to the brim of Plush Rump merchandise. He held a map and looked back and forth at his surroundings.

Bro: Well why the hell haven't you been paying rent?

Karkat:..........WHAT THE <********>, NEXT THING YOU KNOW DAVE WILL START STRIPTEASING A <********> PAWBEAST.

Luna: He's already doing that.
[Dave begins a striptease in the past.]

Kampfer: gamzee just smiled at Bro an offered him some freshly made slime pie he had sitting in his crotch pocket as a form of payment

Karkat: [Done with Life]

Luna: John looked over towards Kankri, his eyes full of sparkles as he gazed upon the majestic troll.

Bro: Is this pudding or nah.

Karkat: That's s**t.


▁ ▁ ▁ prologue continues next post. ▁ ▁ ▁

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Bro in Smuppet Land

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Luna: John touched Karkat's butt gently before pushing him into he ball pit and jumping in after him for a secret sloppy make out time.

Kampfer: Dave turned to bro an asked you ready for this bro.

Karkat began to screech as he rolled around, panicking and slapping Kankri in the face with a rubber duck that flew from his underpants.
"SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

Karkat soon realised that John had in fact touched his butt........ "WAIT A <********> SECOND, DID YOU <********> JUST <********> TOUCH MY MOTHER ********> a**, YOU <********> MOTHER <********> JACKASS WITH YOUR s**t <********>"
Karkat flew out of the ball pit like a banshee out of hell.

Kanks: Kankri swam away, emerging out to witness the two men sloppily making out with the Smuppet theme song echoing in the background. He gasped a tiny little Kanny gasp and blew his whistle at the triggering sight.
Suddenly, a violent rubber duck ricocheting from the distance smacked Kankri in the face, causing the whistle to fly in to the Plush Rump perfume scented air and Kankri to fly backwards in to the bouncy castle walls.

Bro: I was born ready. You already know. ◥▶◀◤

Kampfer: Both Dave and Bro begun to start shaking there man boobs which are also called moobs all about like some badasses.

Luna: "Yes." Replied John. "Yes I did touch that sexy a** of yours." John had grabbed onto karkat's pants and flew out with the troll. "Wait for me Karkat!" He shouted.

Bro: He ripped his pants off and tied them around his head. R. Kellys Bump n Grind played in the distance.
He frolicked around in his striped quarantined anime girl panties.

Karkat: OPPA KARKAT STYLE -Starts dancing randomly, swinging John around.

Kampfer: Dave turned his attention to Karkat you jelly man this s**t is awesome.

Luna: "Wheeee!" John was spun around by Karkat. Once the spinning stopped he stripped down to his dragon boxers and began to sexy dance.

Kanks: Kankri grabbed his stuff and huffed, jumping in to the Bouncy Castle section of the gargantuan inflatable activity Smuppet and bouncing away until he was back in the convention center for SMUPPET CON 2015.

Bro: He rubbed that felty goodness all over his body, oh god oh YES, JUST LIKE THAT

Karkat: He would stand there contemplating life due to the fact that things had began to go along the lines of the human hentai that John had once spoke of, such things existed in the human world yet befuddled the poor mutant troll.

Karkat then walked over to a wall and started mashing his head against the wall. "SHUUUUUUUUUUUT UP DAVE!"

Bro: He decorprialized due to the sheer euphoria.

Karkat: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU ALL.

Karkat Banned everyone from the Memo.


End of Prologue

■ ■ ■ C R A C K F I C   T H E A T E R ■ ■ ■
Bro in Smuppet Land

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Luna: John eventually found the Nic Cage section and gave a small gasp when he noticed a certain red sweater wearing person. It was senpai! Senpai was there! Feeling giddy and nervous John quietly approached Kankri. Hoping senpai would notice him.

Kanks: Kankri observed the oversized Nic Cage inspired wall clock, his palm resting near his chin.
Would Crabdad prefer this, or perhaps the Troll Bieber posters the stall over?
He reached in to his bag, shamefully pulling out his wallet and plucking a plastic-wrapped editon of PlayCage from a nearby pile.
He couldn't help but notice, however, the heavy breathing of a boy behind him.

Luna: "Sorry but you're not my type kk. Deal wiith iit!" Sollux slapped the vase back at Karkat and then went to kick Karkat in the bone bulge.

Karkat: Rolls out of the way, proceeding to push Sollux against the wall and shamelessly make out with him.

Luna: Sollux embraced karkat. How could he fight this beatiful, wonderful specimen of a troll? He hugged Karkat tightly, whispering. " Please...be gentle wiith me Kk."

Karkat placed him down on the ground gently, stroking his cheek and playing with his hair as he looked up at the other thoughtfully before dumping them on the floor "I WOULD BUT THEN I REMEMBER ABOUT THE ******** I GIVE, WHICH IS ******** NONE."

Luna: " Biitch ju2t 2hut up and keep kii22iing me." He grabbed Karkat by the hair, pulling his head down and kissed him deeply. Taking off his crown and putting on top of Karkat's head.

Karkat was thus the Bee King "HOLY <********> s**t, I AM THE <********> BEE KING, SUCESS I HAVE ACHIEVED MY LIFES MEANING!"-Karkat smirked, slapping Sollux, grinding against him and shoving his tongue down the other trolls throat.

Luna: John tried to keep his breathing in check but...the thought of senpai made his heart skip a beat. He shifted around nervously. Wondering if senpai noticed him. For now he grabbed a nearby piece of merchandise, trying to calm himself down.

Crabdad: Walked into the room where Sollux and Karkat were, staring at them as he would snap his claw open and shut.
"SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

Luna: " 2hiit! We've been caught!" Sollux jumped out the window, leaving his shirt behind. Landing in a tree nearby and fleeing for his life.

Kanks: Kankri slowly turned his head, bringing the boy behind him in to view. He took a shaky breath,
immediately connecting the two pieces together: it was him.
The glisten in the boy's eyes, the unrealistically anime shine of his ebony black hair: it was him. The future uke of his wildest dreams, destined to be dominated by the wild seme that lived within himself like a manebeast behind bars.
Unable to locate words, he stared in to the eyes of the man who was clothed in a white tee with a green slime emblem. Breathtaking.


▁ ▁ ▁ chapter 1 continues next post. ▁ ▁ ▁