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 Posted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 7:48 pm
whelp i hit my low today wanted to spend most of it curled up in my bed. forced myself to get up and start the day but i guess i'm useless...i hide things well...all day no one picked up i was sad guess i've gotten better. life it seems is at a halt atm. i'm really upset i feel like i failed...i'm trying so hard...but i've been slapped in the face so much it makes me wonder...but i'll suck it up and keep moving trying to make things better...i just wish people didn't push me aside so easily and well use me...i guess thats my own fault for trying to make others happy...the truth is if i were to speak my mind i'd be an a*****e to the user's and well the people i don't like. but i hate to hurt others so i won't. i'll wait and when the time comes release my inner self ...the cocky,funny,dickish, lovable, kind zato. i'm not gonna lie i have my moments like all of you do. every time i try to be the nice guy it blows up at me. so i've pondered to myself if i should just stop being nice... but that would be bad. i like being kind to my friends. (the few i have.) i wish i would have done things differently...but the past is the past. i know i'm going to be something great. it's just the road there is hard but nothing worth having is ever easy. i'll get a job even if it kills me, start HRT, get chest surgery, lose weight and be a sexy beast, become a bassist for a band in japan, get a husband, adopt a kid, and give to the needy of the world. i want to make a difference even if it's small. i need to quit having a pity party and man up! come on zato!! i know you can do this!! I WILL OWN THIS! I'M ONE HELL OF A MAN! wow...that felt good...to let this all out...thank you. sorry about this. I BELIEVE IN ALL OF YOU!! WE CAN DO THIS!! WE WILL BE THE HOTTEST AND THE BEST DAMN PEOPLE WE CAN BE! just you wait! sorry i'm being weird. 
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Posted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 6:38 pm
Samurai_Zatoichi whelp i hit my low today wanted to spend most of it curled up in my bed. forced myself to get up and start the day but i guess i'm useless...i hide things well...all day no one picked up i was sad guess i've gotten better. life it seems is at a halt atm. i'm really upset i feel like i failed...i'm trying so hard...but i've been slapped in the face so much it makes me wonder...but i'll suck it up and keep moving trying to make things better...i just wish people didn't push me aside so easily and well use me...i guess thats my own fault for trying to make others happy...the truth is if i were to speak my mind i'd be an a*****e to the user's and well the people i don't like. but i hate to hurt others so i won't. i'll wait and when the time comes release my inner self ...the cocky,funny,dickish, lovable, kind zato. i'm not gonna lie i have my moments like all of you do. every time i try to be the nice guy it blows up at me. so i've pondered to myself if i should just stop being nice... but that would be bad. i like being kind to my friends. (the few i have.) i wish i would have done things differently...but the past is the past. i know i'm going to be something great. it's just the road there is hard but nothing worth having is ever easy. i'll get a job even if it kills me, start HRT, get chest surgery, lose weight and be a sexy beast, become a bassist for a band in japan, get a husband, adopt a kid, and give to the needy of the world. i want to make a difference even if it's small. i need to quit having a pity party and man up! come on zato!! i know you can do this!! I WILL OWN THIS! I'M ONE HELL OF A MAN! wow...that felt good...to let this all out...thank you. sorry about this. I BELIEVE IN ALL OF YOU!! WE CAN DO THIS!! WE WILL BE THE HOTTEST AND THE BEST DAMN PEOPLE WE CAN BE! just you wait! sorry i'm being weird. .look here; you are a ******** awesome guy that shouldn't hide your true self. "Be" yourself, just be true to yourself! So what if speaking the truth and your mind makes you sound like an a*****e. s**t! You're being yourself and there is absolutly no shame in doing so. I'm a funny a*****e too! I express it like its nothing around friends, family, etc! I know when it is bad to be a jerk, and I know when its fine. You should not be afraid to speak the truth if it may affect ones feelings. You have to pause and think if that person will consider your feelings as well. Life has its bumps and potholes here and there, but that's how it is. It is not going to be perfect of the way we want it. Knowing that by itself, we must suck it up and move on for the better. I'm like you in a way. I have some pretty damn haunting past towards me. I know I must let it go in order for s**t to look better. Even if its just a little bit. If you know that there are people who accepts you for you, don't ******** hide it from those peoples because they will be the ones who tells you that "it is okay". Who will embrace you, support you, care for you, and walk with you though your stages. I know this sounds weird, but I care for you. If I didn't, then I wouldn't be responding jack s**t to you. I want you to feel better and look at the brighter things. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm right here (562 - 500- 4946) call me or text if you're down, okay?
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Posted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 6:42 pm
cosplayherounite Samurai_Zatoichi whelp i hit my low today wanted to spend most of it curled up in my bed. forced myself to get up and start the day but i guess i'm useless...i hide things well...all day no one picked up i was sad guess i've gotten better. life it seems is at a halt atm. i'm really upset i feel like i failed...i'm trying so hard...but i've been slapped in the face so much it makes me wonder...but i'll suck it up and keep moving trying to make things better...i just wish people didn't push me aside so easily and well use me...i guess thats my own fault for trying to make others happy...the truth is if i were to speak my mind i'd be an a*****e to the user's and well the people i don't like. but i hate to hurt others so i won't. i'll wait and when the time comes release my inner self ...the cocky,funny,dickish, lovable, kind zato. i'm not gonna lie i have my moments like all of you do. every time i try to be the nice guy it blows up at me. so i've pondered to myself if i should just stop being nice... but that would be bad. i like being kind to my friends. (the few i have.) i wish i would have done things differently...but the past is the past. i know i'm going to be something great. it's just the road there is hard but nothing worth having is ever easy. i'll get a job even if it kills me, start HRT, get chest surgery, lose weight and be a sexy beast, become a bassist for a band in japan, get a husband, adopt a kid, and give to the needy of the world. i want to make a difference even if it's small. i need to quit having a pity party and man up! come on zato!! i know you can do this!! I WILL OWN THIS! I'M ONE HELL OF A MAN! wow...that felt good...to let this all out...thank you. sorry about this. I BELIEVE IN ALL OF YOU!! WE CAN DO THIS!! WE WILL BE THE HOTTEST AND THE BEST DAMN PEOPLE WE CAN BE! just you wait! sorry i'm being weird. .look here; you are a ******** awesome guy that shouldn't hide your true self. "Be" yourself, just be true to yourself! So what if speaking the truth and your mind makes you sound like an a*****e. s**t! You're being yourself and there is absolutly no shame in doing so. I'm a funny a*****e too! I express it like its nothing around friends, family, etc! I know when it is bad to be a jerk, and I know when its fine. You should not be afraid to speak the truth if it may affect ones feelings. You have to pause and think if that person will consider your feelings as well. Life has its bumps and potholes here and there, but that's how it is. It is not going to be perfect of the way we want it. Knowing that by itself, we must suck it up and move on for the better. I'm like you in a way. I have some pretty damn haunting past towards me. I know I must let it go in order for s**t to look better. Even if its just a little bit. If you know that there are people who accepts you for you, don't ******** hide it from those peoples because they will be the ones who tells you that "it is okay". Who will embrace you, support you, care for you, and walk with you though your stages. I know this sounds weird, but I care for you. If I didn't, then I wouldn't be responding jack s**t to you. I want you to feel better and look at the brighter things. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm right here (562 - 500- 4946) call me or text if you're down, okay? thanks man. same goes for you. i just need to get my s**t together emotion_hug .
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Posted: Sat Dec 14, 2013 10:43 am
 Hope you are feeling better. Sorry you've been feeling so cruddy. Keep moving forward Zato. You have great goals and I'm sure you will accomplish every one of them!!
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Posted: Sat Dec 14, 2013 11:14 am
Plum Blossom Bear Hope you are feeling better. Sorry you've been feeling so cruddy. Keep moving forward Zato. You have great goals and I'm sure you will accomplish every one of them!! thanks =)
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Posted: Mon Dec 16, 2013 12:41 am
Dude, there is nothing wrong with showing anger imo
I can be a major d**k sometimes.
There's no point in letting yourself be walked all over
especially if most people would throw you in front of the bus when it came down to it.
Holding your anger in is bad
granted, I let mine out more than I probably should
but I'm sure you can find a middle ground.
Just do what I do
Live in the moment.
People spend so much time thinking/worrying about the future.
You're a cool person from what I've discovered
So, don't be so hard on yourself
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Posted: Mon Dec 16, 2013 9:07 am
Crux_Nightmare Dude, there is nothing wrong with showing anger imo
I can be a major d**k sometimes.
There's no point in letting yourself be walked all over
especially if most people would throw you in front of the bus when it came down to it.
Holding your anger in is bad
granted, I let mine out more than I probably should
but I'm sure you can find a middle ground.
Just do what I do
Live in the moment.
People spend so much time thinking/worrying about the future.
You're a cool person from what I've discovered
So, don't be so hard on yourself your right thanks =)
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Posted: Mon Dec 16, 2013 2:29 pm
Samurai_Zatoichi Crux_Nightmare Dude, there is nothing wrong with showing anger imo
I can be a major d**k sometimes.
There's no point in letting yourself be walked all over
especially if most people would throw you in front of the bus when it came down to it.
Holding your anger in is bad
granted, I let mine out more than I probably should
but I'm sure you can find a middle ground.
Just do what I do
Live in the moment.
People spend so much time thinking/worrying about the future.
You're a cool person from what I've discovered
So, don't be so hard on yourself your right thanks =) Anytime man wink
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