Now don't get me wrong, I love the Holidays just as much as the next guy, but right now this time of year is hard. I never minding not getting gifts too much, but this year we can't afford it at all. This was always the time of year I could just get all the clothes shopping I needed done. It stinks not getting anything. I try to be thankful for what I have. The stress just gets to me sometimes though. I have been trying to get a job since the day after graduation. Nobody wants me because I have no experience, but I can't get experience without getting a job. I feel so terrible, because I want to help pay the bills. Also, the only way I can go to college is if I get a job and save enough. This time of year just mocks that I'm broke with all the spending. It gets difficult to be thankful, even though I am so lucky to have a family that loves me and a home to be in.
It isn't just the having no money, no job, or no life thing that gets me though. I have no boyfriend and very few people to talk to. I only feel guilty venting to my family or college friends. I feel guilty with family, because don't want them to feel they've failed. And feel guilty venting to my friend who were able to go to college because then they'll feel bad telling me all of the exciting things they're experiencing. I feel very alone and every time I think I have made a friend I can talk to, they suddenly stop. I just want to feel less alone...
It isn't just the having no money, no job, or no life thing that gets me though. I have no boyfriend and very few people to talk to. I only feel guilty venting to my family or college friends. I feel guilty with family, because don't want them to feel they've failed. And feel guilty venting to my friend who were able to go to college because then they'll feel bad telling me all of the exciting things they're experiencing. I feel very alone and every time I think I have made a friend I can talk to, they suddenly stop. I just want to feel less alone...
