It started with wishing a friend luck. I needed to get out and really examine my feelings. Minty screwed up her courage and before my eyes confessed her love to the Rose Prince. Watching, I had to swallow the lump in my throat. H-how had she done it? It was then that my own feelings gave me such a pang. Why did I never do that? You know why, my mind coos. These voices can be so taunting, but correct. A
song starts in my head as my mind goes through it all.
Ah, but who do I mean? The Rose Prince? No, but he like many others will be involved in this whole mess that is my emotional attachments to a select group of people. I grow introspective, yet there is much to tell if I can ever hope to understand. In this way, I suppose it begins and the Rose Prince isn't far behind.
Easter of 2011 found me bright eyed and lavished in attention. First, a sweet little note from Quickman, which lead to many conversations for many months. In the midst of this, a green eyed royal decided to show me why he deserved my complete devotion and loyalty.
An event didn't go by that wouldn't find me entangled in his sheets, words, and deeds, but he had my loyalty and those moments were enjoyed. Mm, but I get ahead of myself. Someone important came to me then as well. Right at the end, I met him, and thus the pang of missed opportunity and regret mentioned earlier.
It was so simple. He came into my life, gave me his watch, his coat to keep me warm, and he treated me so well. I was soon clinging to him, wanting to be close to this sweet person.
We became friends, talking many times and my weakness for ears finding it's way in before I could stop it. He made the best noises when his ears got attention. Oh, and when he blushed, such a sight.
Not all times were good, though. He and another got in a terrible fight, their evil sides coming out and taking over. I couldn't bare it, I knew they were close, this wasn't like them at all. I happened to find the one person who could help and brought her to them. She brought them back, though it pains me to say I wish I could have. Even though he was so thankful to me for bringing help, perhaps that's what brought out my own evil side.
Well, evil side or possession by something that fed on my envy, who can say? I later claimed I had no memory of any of it, but in truth I could see all it had me do. It taunted me, getting so close, teasing him, but threatening when he wanted it to stop. I could barely fight back, just enough to let him know I was still in there. That was the first time he saved me. He threw down the headphones causing whatever it was to have control away, and there I rested in his lap, no energy to move, but I was content. He'd keep me there, safe till I could move again.
Then came Halloween, when once again I had need of his help. This time I was stabbed, and I died. He cried for me . . . He fought back his tears as best he could, but some escaped anyway. Then with some strange concoction, he placed his hands over my wound and brought me back. I saw those tears and had to fight down the want to caress his face and wipe them away. I already knew at that point where and with whom his heart lay, but my resolve to not try and act on my feelings was weak when he was so vulnerable.
Every part of me wanted to comfort him, but thankfully I was weak from being brought back to life, and that kept me from doing much of anything but saying thank you. That was when he gave me the hair clip I try to always wear. It was a crescent moon, a symbol of his friendship.
Time went on and soon he, much like Quick, wasn't around as often as I would hope. He'd still be around now and then, and it always made me happy, yet the hole was still there where I wanted for his love to fill. Instead, I began trying to find some other way to feel whole again.
As one would guess from a kink, my coping was often found in another's bed. This was when seeing Prince every event was often so welcome. It was a moment to forget, to let pleasure reign free. To call out to Prince for each bit of enjoyment he brought. Afterward was always hard. I'd come down, alone as always.
Others began to have welcoming arms, too. I'd cozy up to them and be rewarded with a night of pleasure. I'd let ones like Velvet Noir take me again and again in slow teasing ways, or be bound by Master, and taken roughly. Then of course, my weakness would be given moments when my fuzzy buddy would let me pet his ears. He's very cute when he blushes.
But soon I found another to give me some affection, at least in the sense of how often I would end up getting such special attention from them. Bittersweet, mm sweet Bitters. How often I found myself in her arms being taken to more private places, I've lost count. With her I would reciprocate, and I would be okay again, at least for a little while. What can I say, I love to enjoy a treat. Bitters gave me something the others didn't: affirmation. I could get Bitters to call out my name, never loudly but always in pleasure. She would hold me as I'd come down, too. I almost felt like I had found one who could fill that hole.
But fate is not so kind to this elf. Bitters already has a mate, so I am merely someone else who gets to lie in her bed. At times I feel it's the best I can hope for, and I keep going back time and again.
Not long ago that was where I was, still talking to the one I could never have and like one so weak, I would go back to the woman who made me feel special, but who also couldn't be mine alone. But then, sad news. He would be leaving, never to return. He was going off with his love so they could be truly happy.
Here we are back at present, as I sit thinking just as Minty stands, Prince having left rather quickly. My mind is on him, who I want so badly yet won't say. He's happy, I can't ruin that. Just as long as I can see that smile one more time, I'll do anything to keep that smile on his face. Ignore these tears, after all, I always aim to please.
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