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Jace, and the two police officers were staring at him as well, the blond seeming thankful, and ashamed at the same time, “..alright, well. It seems you've answered our questions. Go ahead and get in your car, and we'll escort you back to school, okay?” The officers didn't seem convinced, but it was all Darren could do. Jace and Dare broke eye contact then, but he watched him do as he was asked. It wasn't but a few minutes before they disappeared, and he and his father returned to the warmth of their embarrassingly small house.

“Moving back was a mistake, I think. We're going to see about switching you schools. You're getting hurt too often-”

“I can take care of myself, dad.”

“No, Darren, you can't! You don't understand. You won't understand until you have children of your own, and when you do, I pray to God they don't worry you as much as you do me. Darren, all I want to do is protect you.” He didn't say anything back then. His dad had every right to worry, but there was a code. There was no way he would go out of his way to let his dad down. He knew full well how much pain his father had been in, and who could blame him for being so protective after having just lost his wife? It had barely been a month since she'd passed...

“Yes, dad... I know that.”

Mr. Casey leaned down and kissed his forehead, hugging his neck gently with one arm, “Go lie down, like you're supposed to be, and I'll make you some lunch.. We'll... talk once we're calm, and you're feeling better, alright?” Dare smiled at him, and then nodded, silently promising himself that he wouldn't let his dad worry anymore. It was a promise he hoped he could keep.


CHAPTER 3
– – – – – – –

For the rest of the week, and the weekend, Darren stayed in his bed where he was supposed to. He hadn't heard from Jace since that day, but when he thought of him, the only image that came to mind was that last kiss. His lips felt so right against his own, and he'd seemed so unsure. So nervous. Dare couldn't even bring himself to be angry.

Instead of switching schools, his father decided to let him use the car to get to and from school. Apparently he'd decided to carpool with a coworker until he had enough money to buy his own car, but he wanted his son to be safe each day. In a way, it was kind of cool. In another way, it was both humiliating to drive the rust bucket, and pathetic that he had to. Either way, Darren slowly got dressed that Monday morning, and pulled his backpack onto his shoulders before walking outside. His dad was standing on the porch, probably waiting to say goodbye, and Dare smiled at him, “I love you, dad. I'll see you after school.” It seemed as if his dad didn't even want him going yet, but he knew he'd held his son up in his bedroom for long enough. He had to trust him to be safe, because if anything like this happened once more time, he was going to rip him away, and move out with him to the middle of nowhere. It had been threatened all night Sunday.

“I love you, too, Darren. Be safe.”

He quickly made his way to the driver's seat, and threw his backpack next to himself, fixing his mirrors and the seat until it was perfect. He stared at his dad for a moment, hoping he wouldn't stress out too hard while he was gone. Dare would be back before he knew it, and with some effort, he got the car to come to life. It was the first time he'd driven in a while, and he was a little shaky. What would he say when he saw Jace? He doubted that the a*****e he called a friend once upon a time would even bother speaking to him after all that had happened, and he couldn't say that he blamed him. He wanted to pretend that he didn't care either, but he did, and it wasn't until he saw Alex and his friends standing in the parking lot that he actually managed to stop thinking about Jace for a moment. He froze, pissing off the people waiting to get into the parking lot. For once, he was actually glad he didn't have perfect grades. He didn't mind looking for a spot outside the school parking lot, he just didn't want to be anywhere near Alex or his friends.

He was a coward, and even he knew it.

After about ten minutes of looking, Dare managed to find a nice parking space by the McDonald's about a block away. There, he relaxed for about fifteen minutes, smoking a cigarette, and preparing himself for all the stupid looks from kids he didn't know over something they knew nothing about. If his teachers were too easy on him before, he was scared to see what they were going to be like now. As much as the car really wasn't worth locking up, Darren made sure to do so before walking down to the back entrance to the school. He pulled his hood over his head, held his backpack tight to his shoulder, and made his way to his locker. He was actually surprised to get to his locker without running into one of the meat heads. Maybe they'd run off, afraid because he was so tough, he came back to school after being attacked.

Supposed he just wanted to make himself sound a little more tough than he really was, but.. Darren looked around the corner, then got into his locker and pulled out his textbook for first period, “..see, he's not dead.” He froze, glancing through his long bangs over to a pair of girls, who walked on past him, “Duh, if he were dead, Jace would be in prison.”

Darren's eyes widened, and he slammed his locker shut, “What the ******** are you talking about?” He demanded loudly, scaring the girls, who quickly fell silent and jogged away. Jace? Where would they get an idea like...? Suddenly, he felt sick to his stomach. Even if it would have been poetic justice, he couldn't help but feel like fate was biting Jace in the a**, all because of his dad.

For his first three classes, Dare didn't even notice the looks that he was getting. He didn't care anymore; all he could think about was Jace, and the fact that he hadn't gone through the normal entrance that morning, so he hadn't seen him. He'd gone so far as to defend him from the police, but was it really his job to correct a school? Should he really be so upset that people were jumping to conclusions. If Jace hadn't left him behind in the first place, no one would suspect him. He'd saves him once, wasn't that enough? Still, he couldn't help how guilty he was feeling. Of one thing, Darren was certain: he would tell anyone that is wasn't Jace, but he would tell no one who did it. Even if Jace had been a shitty friend, there was no way he could let himself sink so low.

It wasn't until lunch that he caught a glimpse of him, smoking his cigarette all by himself on the corner by the park. His eyes seemed empty, and he didn't address the people around him with his usual smile. Something about this side of Jace was a little thrilling, but unsettling all at once. He wondered how long this had been going on at the school, and slowly lit his own cigarette as he inched his way closer to Jace for a better view. He was focused, watching the curb closely with an angry expression decorating those handsome features of his, and who could blame him. There was something to be said about how torn Darren was, seeing that look on his face. He wanted to kiss him again, but he also wanted to make him laugh. Smile. Suppose he could accomplish one by doing the other, but before he could move any closer, amber eyes caught his own, and he froze in place. Traffic was at a standstill, and the people around him didn't exist. There was only his street corner and Jace's, the sound of his heartbeat drowning out any and all sound around them.

Then Jace pulled out his phone, and his face lit up like a light.

Darren was jealous, his cheeks heating up and turning a deep crimson. Who could he be talking to, that made him so happy? He thought that was a kind of connection only they had, but he supposed Jace had at least a handful of girls on the side. Right about then, he was probably using some cheesy line to get some girl to ******** him in the back of his fancy little car. Dare shook his head, turning away quickly and finding a quiet spot in which to smoke the rest of his cigarette. He really had nothing to say to him anyway..

Instead of attending his next class, Dare opted to head down to the counselor, and he waited in the same chair that he had last time until Mrs. Butler emerged, calling him back. Today, she was wearing a blue dress. It was Darren's least favorite color, but it didn't look to bad on her, he guessed. Slowly, he sank into the chair, waiting for her to start the conversation, “How are you doing today? I heard you got into some trouble.. You do remember what I said, right?”

He smiled, only a little, then nodded, “People are pointing fingers at that boy I like,” His voice was soft, “and I'm actually having a problem of conscience; I'm not sure if I should help more than I've already tried, or not. It didn't seem to do much last time.. My dad shouldn't have accused him the first place, but he's overprotective.”

The expression on her face was knowing, a mother's expression. Since his own mother had died, nothing had been going right. What would she expect him to do? Wouldn't she want him to do the right thing? But he'd already done the right thing. It wasn't his fault.. If that was so, why did he feel this way? There were a few questions she asked him, and he answered mechanically. Darren wasn't even sure why he'd gone to her, now, “I'm thinking I've already cleared his name with the police. I can't stop an entire school, but I can be there with him while they tell their stories, and spread their rumors. That's more than he ever did for me.” He shook his head, and stood, “I think I'm ready to go back to class. Thanks for helping me sort out my thoughts.”

This was one of those wonderful times that he resented not having a cell phone, and Jace's number. He wanted to make sure they would be able to meet up when seventh period was over, and talk before going their separate ways. Darren looked down to the slip in Mrs. Butler's hand, then smiled as he took it, running out of her office and down the halls to his class.

– – – – –

“Is it true?”

There was only one girl the entire day brave enough to actually approach him and ask the question on everyone's mind. Darren knew what she meant, but he almost felt like shooting her a nasty glare, and telling her to mind her own business. Juicy gossip, and suddenly people wanted to acknowledge the fact that he was a living, breathing human being just like they were. Or at least he was for long enough to tell them what they wanted to hear, and then he turned back into a pumpkin.

“That I'm a f*****t?” He asked casually, referring to the letters on his locker, as if she had seen them.

Her face scrunched up, and she clarified, “Uh...no. I mean about Jace. Was he the one that... y'know..?”

Darren raised an eyebrow. Here was a small opportunity to set things straight, “Jace is too much of a b***h. Couldn't have been him. As brave as you are, committing social suicide by talking to me, why don't you go play detective somewhere else?” She didn't seem pleased, and Dare couldn't find it in him to care. For the rest of last period, he watched the clock. When the bell rang, he was the first one out the door, but his running was quickly stopped by a searing pain in his stomach which he tried to ignore. He didn't have his schedule anymore, so he didn't know where to meet him, but he knew where he parked. He just had to make sure to get there before Jace left.

Without making it worse, Darren tried to race to ground level, and get to the parking lot. The doors were all crowded, so he opted for the side doors, near where he'd parked, “Jace!” He called out to the blond. He was at least a block away, through a sea of teenagers, but he'd somehow managed to hear Dare's voice. The pain in his stomach kept him from running to meet him, so he tried to flag him over. He called out to him again, and waved an arm back at himself, but Jace shook his head as if he were disappointed, and held his phone up to his ear. Another call? “Jace!” This time, he didn't turn around.

If there was one thing that he didn't like, it was being ignored. He watched Jace get into his car, and finish his call before speeding off. He'd intentionally ignored him... The walk back to his own car was long, the pavement uneven beneath his feet, spattered with leaves of weeds bleeding through the cracks. The wind was starting to pick up, stinging his skin, but easing the pain in his stomach. It almost felt like he'd ripped a stitch, but he was too afraid to look, and instead pushed the palm of his hand against himself for pressure just in case. The car door handle was chilly to his touch, and he swore he felt a spiderweb, but ripped the door open too fast to be sure, and he would have checked if he weren't afraid of spiders, and hadn't seen Alex standing across the street. They both stared at one another for a long time, but neither moved. There was light bruising on the guy's face, but surely those weren't from Darren; they would have been gone by then, he thought. They both nodded their heads toward one another, as if they were in some way equals, or at least at a truce, even though Dare couldn't understand why.

Quickly, he pulled his door open, and slid inside, starting the engine. As his car was warming up, he started to pull up his shirt to look at the bandage over his stitches and search for signs of blood. Surprised to find nothing, he closed his eyes, and dropped his shirt back down, only to sink into his seat and fidget around with his hand in the console. Pulling out a pipe, and some green from between the seats, he lit up. It was an unfortunate habit he'd picked up around the time his mom started scraping neat white lines on her's and his father's wedding photo. His dad was struggling with bills, and since he was too busy falling behind in school, he couldn't handle a job at the same time. At least not a time-consuming one, so it was the illegal business he took to. They had prescribed painkillers for Darren, but he'd been terrified of such things since it was rumored that's how his mother had started out in the first place. He could barely handle Tylenol as it was, and at least weed couldn't kill you, right?

Smoke filled the car, and he relaxed back in the seat further, reclining it back after hiding all of his instruments once again. The passenger seat window was cracked, so that the smoke would gradually leave, and he stared up at the roof of his car as he began to hum to himself a lullaby his mother used to sing to him. He knew that he probably shouldn't. He knew better. Darren knew thinking about her after smoking would lead to a panic attack, but he allowed himself to fall into the memories, soaking in each and every precious moment he'd spent with his mother. He couldn't feel the pain in his stomach anymore, but a new pain tugged at his insides, his eyes burning with tears. She'd gone so fast... He hadn't even gotten to say goodbye. God, she had been so unhealthy looking the months before her passing, and even though Darren tried to convince himself that her death was for the best, his heart was breaking for the first time. Before he could catch himself, he was curled up in the driver seat, his head in his arms as he bawled. His shoulders shook, and tears burned red streaks down his face as he cursed; cursed the God who'd taken his mother away, and cursed Jace's parents.

They had already been struggling back then, even though his mother had a pretty good job. He and Jace made one mistake, and his parents turned around and sued his struggling family for damaged property they weren't prepared to pay for. It had been an accident... He had only been trying to cheer his friend up how they always did. For a moment, Dare allowed himself to wonder what things would have been like if the fire had never happened. Would he and Jace have grown so far apart? Would he have had a chance then? Would his mother have still been alive?

Darren sat his seat back up, and buckled himself in before taking off for home. He took the back roads, of course, making sure to drive as carefully as he could manage so he could get back to his father in one piece, and when he finally pulled into the driveway at home, he leaned over to roll up the windows. Grabbing his backpack, he headed inside, waving hello to his father, then headed back to his room to try and study.

After two days, he gave up looking for Jace at school. It was like, after getting that call, he'd just up and disappeared, and though Darren knew where he lived, he didn't want to chance going there and looking his parents in the eye without someone to hold him back. Maybe he was sick?

It was early evening Thursday, and most of the homework he cared to finish was taken care of. He helped his dad set the table, and sit down to dinner with him. It was awkward, the conversation slim as it had been since Dare refused to tell him who hurt him, and after they were done, he took their dishes in to the kitchen. Wrist deep in the hot water, the phone rang, “Dad, phone.” He called out over the sound of clanking dishes. The cordless stopped ringing, and Darren went back to rinsing off the remaining glassware as his dad popped in through the archway.

“It's for you.”

He turned around, wiping the back of his wet hand against his forehead, “Who is it?”

Mr. Casey shrugged, “They didn't say.” He'd been getting fewer calls recently, but his father was still pretty worn out on the telephone. He'd never been much of a phone person, anyway. Darren nodded, as if to tell him he'd get it once he finished up, and the old man nodded back, leaving him to stack the dishes to dry.

Wiping his hands dry on his pants, he grabbed the cordless and covered the mouthpiece, “Okay, dad, you can hang up,” As he lodged the phone between his shoulder and ear, he spoke again, beginning to make his dad a pot of tea, “You've got Darren. What can I do for ya?”

There was a pause on the other line, static faint as they cleared their throat, “It's Jace.”

“Oh..” He frowned, turning the coffee machine on after hanging the tea bags in the pot, “Yeah, I noticed you were missing from school for a couple days. You know... There were some pretty nasty rumors going around about you.” Dare slowly made his way out of the kitchen, turning out the light, and waving to his dad before walking back to his room and shutting the door.

“I don't... Care about the stupid rumors, Darren.” He sounded upset. Not angry, but like he was struggling, trying to find the right words in his jumbled thoughts. He stretched out on his bed, getting comfortable as he waited to find out why the boy had called him in the first place, “I never got to actually thank you for... You know, saving me from getting a ride in a cop car. My folks would have...” He trailed off, but Darren understood. His parents had always been a little off the grid. There as tension in Jace's voice, though, and that scared him a little.

“Wait, are they why you haven't been in school?”

“No.. No, I went to my uncle's for a few days. They were angry.. Apparently the rumors reached them, too, and y'know..” His voice was shaking, “they never take kindly to bad publicity. I just.. Darren, I'm so sorry I put you through this crap before. I should have been a better friend to you back then, I just got so lost.”

Darren smiled, but didn't speak at first. To hear those words eased the pain of a lost friend from a childhood ago, and he burrowed into the pillows supporting his back, “..we were just kids. s**t happens, right?”

“Darren, I swear to God, I'll never let anyone hurt you ever again.”

He furrowed his brow, as if Jace could see him, and pulled the phone away for a second to stare at it. What in the hell was he talking about? It sounded as if he felt guilty, as if he were falling prey to the rumors he knew weren't true. It really sounded like he'd been drinking, but Dare didn't know if should call him out on it or not, “..yeah. Are you gonna be in school tomorrow..? We're doing class selection, and I thought, y'know, you owe me, since I got you off the hook and all.”

There was a pause on the other end, then a muffled curse, “No, I'm not going to be in until late tomorrow..”

“Oh..” He tried not to sound disappointed, but he had hoped they might be able to have a couple classes together, just to get to know each other again, away from Jace's friends, “I guess there's always next year, huh?”

“Dare..” It seemed they'd both run out of words to say, and Darren was about to end the call when Jace sighed, and asked if he had a pen, “Why don't you just... Put in an application for me? I know they're in the office. So just... Read the electives off for me. Tell me which one's you're picking, so we can... Cross our fingers.”

It was almost as if he had been reading Darren's mind. He was the only one who knew how to make him smile, even when he was feeling down. He'd missed this. As he wrote down classes they'd decided on, he clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, “Jace.. I miss my mom. I really.. Want you to come over tomorrow night.” He'd never asked for a shoulder so blatantly in his life, but his mini breakdown from the other day was nothing compared to what he knew was to come in the next few days. His parent's anniversary...

“...I'll talk to my parents.”

“I... The rumors have died down, Jace.” He was starting to tear up again, just thinking about the upcoming couple of days, and the possibility the only thing close to a friend he had might not be able to help him through, “I told everyone it wasn't you. You owe me. Be a friend, for once in your goddamn life.”

There was a light groan from the other line, ending in a whine of sorts, “********, Dare.. You're putting me in a tight spot.. I'll...be there. You can count on me, alright?”

He slowly began to breathe again, calming the urge to cry. He hadn't felt so fragile in his entire life, and he hated every second even if, for once, he felt comfortable with being any form of weak. A laugh broke the rest of the tension in his body, and Darren covered his face with his hand, “Good... I started another rumor about you, though, so they'd stop thinking you tried to kill me.”

“What rumor is that?”

“That you're pretty ******** queer, Jace.”

There was a laugh on the other end, “I saw that you still have the teddy bear I gave you when we were kids, Dare.” His tone changed a little, his voice dropping to a whisper that sent shivers over his skin, “Besides.. I felt the way you reacted to that kiss in your room. It doesn't...have to be the last, does it?”

“..not if you're going to be talking to girls the way you were the other day.”

“What?” Confusion, as his voice got louder again, “What are you talking about?”

The tone of his voice had Darren a little worried he was wrong, his stomach dropping int his feet. He hated making the wrong judgment, but the way Jace had smiled so brightly, “On the phone... You just got so happy all of a sudden, I thought it was one of the members of the Jace fan club.”

“I was calling my uncle, and making arrangements.” He clarified, “Dare, I don't know what you're talking about. I have a fan club?”

He rolled his eyes, as if Jace could see, “Like you haven't noticed all those girls hanging all over you, dude. ..ugh, I better go. I've gotta take a shower, and clean the ol' wound–“

“Darren, wait! There are no girls. There never have been, so... Is it yes?”

He laughed, rolling onto his side, “I'll give you an answer when you show up at my window tomorrow. Okay? Seven-thirty. Knock twice.” With a smile stuck on his lips, he hit end and cradled the phone to his chest as if he'd just been asked out. He was almost too excited to remember to hop into the shower.

It wasn't until several seconds later that he jolted up from his comfortable bed, his eyes wide with fear as he looked down to the phone in his hands and jumped to his feet. He hadn't even checked with his dad to see if he'd hung up the phone, and if he'd heard any of that... If he'd heard any of it, Darren figured he would have already been marching down the hallway to ask him just what the hell was going on between him and some other boy, and then he'd give him a lecture about how he would go to hell. Just like his mother had said when he'd come clean to her; his dad was a little too old fashioned to change his views, and his love for the bible would get in the way for acceptance of his son.

Pursing his lips tight, Dare slowly made his way out of his bedroom, and down the hallway. When he came to stand in the mouth of the hallway, he eyed his father, who was lost in the flashing screen of the television. The phone wasn't hung up, but rather lying upside down on the table at his father's side, as if it had been like that since he answered it for Darren earlier, “Hey, dad... Did you forget to hang up the phone? I could hear, uh.. Static.”

Mr. Casey glanced up at him, then down to the phone, hearing the faint buzzing that meant it had been left off the hook for too long, “Ah, I forgot. My apologies. Who was it?” Every muscle in his body relaxed then, and he sighed a breath of relief as he shrugged and hung the cordless up in the arch to the kitchen, “It was Jace. He wanted to see how I was doing.” His father made a disapproving noise from his chair, and turned his attention back to the TV. Was it still too soon to bring him up? It seemed so. Neither of the boys' parents like the other's friend, so their friendship had always been a little complicated. In his fantasies, ones he's never share with anyone, he'd always imagined they were like Romeo and Juliet. He'd always had feelings for Jace he couldn't even begin to control. Luckily, it seemed the object of his affections returned said feelings... At least a little. Maybe it was curiosity, or some kind of attraction left over from childhood. Whatever it was, he felt like Jace was a necessary puzzle piece missing from his life.

“Tea's done, dad,” Darren finally broke their silence, as he made his way to the hall closet, pulling out an old towel, “I'm going to shower, and clean up a little, then head to bed. Alright?” His father nodded without looking up, and waved goodnight, and his son quickly disappeared down the hall once again. His shower was scalding hot, as usual, which left his pale skin burning red at the end, but soft to the touch. After shaving his face in the little unusual places hair tried to grow, he pulled back the bandage on his stomach, and began to apply his medicated cream to the effected area before taping more gauze over it. The air in the hall, back to his room felt cool against his skin, and he quickly slithered under his cozy blankets after closing his bedroom door. Sweet thoughts of the day to come soon flooded his mind, carrying him off to the movies playing on the backs of his eyelids.