Midnight Enforcer
Post any thoughts if you want yo
WARNING: The stunts and idiocy in this story are wierd. This DOES FOLLOW THE CANON STORY WITH CRAZY CRAP TOO - Now then this is about a dumb kid and the vampires. The stupid kid thought Kaname was cool. I This is what happens when your a level D, you fail highschool because of a teacher that's evil and your obsessed with explosives! Beware of crack, FEATURING RUKAXRIMA KIDDING!
Well, so now I guess I'll run by what just happened. So. I failed my FINAL year in High school in America, I've blown up the school, and I wasn't charged because of my "Mental Instability". This is total bullshit. I act like I'm stupid and can't control my thoughts so I could get away with this kind of stuff. I was hoping I would be known as a terrorist but… Bah didn't work. Now I'll set the scene for you.
RIGHT NOW, I'm in the counselor's office explaining my grades and watching him BURN my diploma in front of me. I'm a genius with an IQ score of 239 and it doesn't help my current situation.
I'm sitting in as chair in front of this man's WALNUT DESK.
HOW THE ******** DID HE BUYS THIS?
IT'S LIKE A SEVEN THOUSAND DOLLAR DESK DAMMIT! RICH b***h!
Oh sorry… Way off topic… anyway.
"How did I not pass Mr. Clark? I was graded a perfect score!" I shouted, little did I know that he sabotaged my grades, which is I'll never find out about… maybe. He gave me a 'HA! I SABOTAGE YYOUUUZZ' smirk and FINALLY ANSWERED.
He took a fast breathe to say `My PLANZ SHALL WIN SO razz ` then spoke.
"Well, you failed a final exam... utterly... it was Mr. Spengler's for Government. I can't just wave it Ian."
I glared at him with an `I'm gunna burn you alive` death look, which he just mini-smirked at. RAWR CHIBI RAWR! THIS a** IS TAUNTING ME!
Ok so that's what was happening earlier today. Now I'm in my house, on my bed with a laptop reading fanfiction and talking to Hana-bun mah bud from good 'ol Jap'n. Where is Jap'n you ask? Its Japan you retarded reader! I'm kidding! I love you, don't leave me! D:
There hours later (TIME SKIP BITCHES?) I'm talking to a friend named Hanabusa in Japan. OKAY ACTUALLY ITS NOT THREE HOURS LATER BUT... WELL... ******** YOU. DON'T JUDGE MY FUTURE SIGHT 's a genius like me BUT, we mess around and I give him ideas on how to mess with the disciplinary committee! Currently his cousin is wondering who the hell he's talking to.
Through my speakers I hear him, "Hanabusa, who is that…?" I jumped up off my bed and adjust my webcam for a full view of my person and bowed like a gentleman. "Kunichiwa Akatsuki Kain! I'm Ian Clayburn from America! I'm the guy that tells Hana how to mess with the Perfects! Every idea he's had was mine! Except for drinking blood to scare Yuuki… THAT was Hanabusa's! Idiot. Don't act like a vampire in front of people. You WILL scare them!" I sheepishly grinned at Akatsuki after my introduction and he just sighed.
"So you're the guy he gets these ideas that get us in trouble? Good to know. Hanabusa, Dorm President Kuran's going to find out…" he stopped feeling another presence and turned around. I saw through Hanabusa's webcam that he looked about seventeen, semi-light brown hair barely reaching down his neck.
"Hey Hana, who the hell is that personeish person of personishness over there with the brown hair? He looks awesome. Hey dude, you're a sharp dresser. Very nice style. I need lessons." I sweat dropped at the end and smirked at Hana who was looking at me with 'I hate you'. "Dorm President Ku—." Hana got cut off by the brown haired personish one.
The brown haired personish one had held his hand up and COMMANDED RESPECTAMUNDO! Then stared at me. IT WAS PEIRCEING! EVEN THROUGH A WEB CAM DAMMIT! OW! WHY AM I YELLING? IT HURTS!
THE ******** IS THIS?
THEN STOP DOING IT YOU f*****t!
THE ******** WAS THAT?
THAT WAS YOUR IDIOT SELF TELLING YOU TO STOP!
THE ******** ARE YOU?
IM INSIDE YOU! ... NO HOMO!
"May I ask who you are young man?" he said to me through the internet. How did he do this? Microphone! O_O/
Something tells me brain I could be died soon.
Yes and you didn't think this when he was glaring because...? Thats Kaname.. huh when did we last se- OI LISTEN f*****t!
STOP CALLING ME A f*****t YOU WHORE!
THEN STOP TALKING TO YOURSELF DUMBASS!
"Uh okay Mr. uhhhh Kuran was it?" Kaname just nodded a yes. "Mkay. Mkay. I got this b***h! Ah! Sorry, used to talking to Bunny over there." –Glare from Hanabusa- "I'm Chiki C, but I go by Yuri of the Glass Roses on my novels and on the internet. Kuran rings a bell… mmmmmmm. NO WAY. ARE YOU KANAME?" Kaname stared and replied, "Yes. What's your real name?" –Death sentence glare from Kaname here- I just laughed slightly and remembered he had a sister when I last met him. "Well, you remembered that much. Geeewwwdddd. Yuri Baka Hanabusa. Where is Yuuki...?" Kaname giggled. Hana-bunny glared even harder.
... Yep he's gay.
GO AWAY INNER SOUL FORWARD SLASH OTHER THING!
NEVA!
DAWWWWW! ALL MY DAWWW!
...
...
THE ******** ARE YOU? & THE ******** ARE YOU!
That stalker in your brain, stealing your memories. I'm Sephiroth. Deal with it f*****t.
When his reply came, I was bored already.
"Yuri-san. It's good to see you again. I take you are well, but how did you meet Hanabusa Aidou?" he asked with the intent to punish said retarded blonde cleary in his eyes. I just glanced at Aidou, "How often do you piss Kaname of dumbass? Obviously constantly. What did you do? Bite Yuuki or something?"
Hana, Akatsuki and Kaname stiffened and I saw –the death of Hanabusa- in Kaname's eyes. "You dumbass. Your screwed Hana-bun. Oh hey Kaname, can I get a letter of recommendation from you or something? I'm my town's genius at IQ score of 237! Last we spoke you said some Crossy Cross guy was enrolling you." I said with a ¬_¬ look plastered on my face.
He looks at me with a ¬_¬ look as well, "Of course. You should have it about now." And my doorbell rang."I'll fill everything out on your way here." I saw my lights flash and spoke quickly, "Crap! My powers about to go out! Thanks Kan-Kan! Later Hana, Akatsuki Ninja g-!" and my power went out. Damn.
Hanabusa POV
I was scared of what Kaname was about to do to me! My mind is freaking out, wait is he leaving? Weird.
"Aidou."
"Yes Lord Kaname!" I answered swiftly.
"You're off the hook since he admitted he gave you the ideas. Get ready for Class."
I watched him leave and I looked at Akatsuki who looked at me and we scrambled to get ready.
YURI POV
Okay. There's a vampire from the Counsel of Elders at my door. Weird. He's semi blonde and handing me a letter and a plane ticket. Then I recognize him.
"Ichiou? Hiiiii!" I grinned and super hugged him. Ichiou was awesome! He taught me how to use a sword a long time ago! Now I can use a sword, bow, pistol, twin blades, and I can craft weapons for vampires out of the blood and using some of their powers! I made a sword for his grandson! My first one!
"Hello Yuri-sama. I trust you have been well?" he asked politely even though he hates the super hugs I give him. His face is always ¬_¬ when I hug him. Psh whatever he's cool.
"I am epic. I finally am the top student in Ameeerrriiiiccccaaaaa! So yes I'm epic. But how have you been? Drop the "sama" not an uh… hmmm. COMPLETE vampire so meh. It's weird. So I'm a what again?"
"You're a Level D. Juuri-sama gave you her blood long ago." His face still ¬_¬ looking.
*Skippy Time!*
I'm now on a plane with Ichiou and his grandson Takuma who also attends the school which I've now learned is called Cross Academy. Apparently Kaname told Takuma to come with Ichiou to guide me to the academy.
This ends chapter one. Why? Because I can you dipshits now go die.
NO! I LOVE YOU!! DON'T LEAVE ME! I NEED REVIEW N FFANS N s**t DAMMIT!
