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So I'm not sure where this should go... I'm just going to post it here until someone tells me it's in the wrong spot sweatdrop Enjoy.

Paranoid Rant

I wonder how one would go about glomping ones self... and how on earth do you hat someone?
Do the stars stop shining when you close your eyes? I wonder if Lucy ever ate those pies... Does a flitterwick fly faster if you feed it spinach?
Why do heffalumps keep harrumphing at me?
Do the walls of my house gossip with the furniture when I can’t hear them... can I trust my doors to not crush my fingers and toes?
Are the butterflies really that interested in that old mans nose?
I swear that the spiders are from the CIA. FBI? Something along those lines.
In any case, the music you’re listening to is certainly brainwashing you into believing you’re a pineapple.
The government wishes to turn us all into a pineapple army so that they can fight against the apparently evil but actually very very good and helpful eggplant kingdom.
What in the name of Kameyonaise are those dragonflies doing to my garden? They must be in league with the spiders. Very suspicious, those spiders.
I wonder if they’re reporting back to HQ when they’re out of sight... or are they still watching me... secretly... that’s a scary thought. Why would they even want to watch me? Maybe I’m secretly a genius! Or a superhero who hasn’t received powers yet! Maybe they just don’t like the way I drive my car... I wonder if they know that I’m typing this... they probably do. They’ll probably let me put it up, let everyone think that I’m loopy.
I probably am just a little loopy, loony, lunicle? Lunar.... Luna... I’M SECRETLY A PRINCESS FROM THE MOON!!! Except I don’t have long blond hair... and I don’t wear it in pigtails with meatballs... and I’m nowhere near stupid enough. Oh well, there goes that theory.
Maybe I’m a penguin, who’s been turned into a human for the purpose of singing to save the world, and the heart of the man that I’m in love with... or was that a duck.. and dancing... hmm... no, probably not.
I do like ballet though, it’s pretty. The people who do it for a living are insane. How can they do that to their poor feet? It shall never cease to amaze me.
Nope, not ever.
I think Lucy tried ballet once... she gave it up after the first day though... actually, I think it only took a minute for her to quit.
Woah, strange sense of de ja vu... I think I may have written this all before. Like a dream.
Maybe the CIA/FBI/Other secret organisation erased this and my memory sometime before.
Maybe they’ll do it again sometime soon. And then we’ll start all over again, and I’ll never get anything done because I’ll be typing this over and over and over again in a never ending cycle until the CIA/FBI/Other secret organisation wipe my memory so much that I become braindead and the world will end because they wouldn’t let me grow into my powers and it will be so very tragic and my poor pot plants!!!
I wonder why that man is dancing... and now I want hot chips. Does anyone know a good place for hot chips around here? I suppose not... I think that by the time anyone answers me I’ll have already gotten over my craving. Or perhaps gone and found some place that sells them. Hmm, now I really do want hot chips.
I think I may be going a little insane. Onward, tally ho, of we go!!! To Spain... no, Germany... No wait... yes... no... PRUSSIA STILL LIVES DAMMIT!!! Well, it’s true. Don’t give me that look. Why are you looking at me like that?
Great. Now even my laptop is conspiring against me. I can’t trust anything. You’re my only friend, nameless person. Reader. Maybe you’re a member of the CIA/FBI/Other secret organisation too. Maybe you’re the person who wiped my memory before. This saddens me. I can’t even trust you, even though you’ve read so many of my ramblings before.
I’m going to stop this now. Yup. There’s no point. No one will believe me! You’ve made certain of that.
Oh well. I suppose I shall take my secret to my grave in a few years time, or maybe in a few days at the rate I’m losing my memory. I won’t remember any of the years and years that I’m going to live, that I have lived. How old am I now? 15... no... 26... no wait... I’m only 18... 18? no, I’m sure I must be 40.
How old do I look? Is there a mirror around here somewhere? No, I stopped keeping mirrors handy ever since the CIA/FBI/Other secret organisation started watching me with them.
The lake is rather pretty today. Although I suppose I shouldn’t approach it, it will ruin the effect.
I saw a dead carp floating around once... it was rather sad. I thought it might have grown extra eyes or something, but I was quickly disappointed... it was just a normal dead fish.
Everything is so normal. Too normal. Suspiciously normal. Not normal enough? I wonder if the CFO feel sorry for me when they see me crying... Does it tug at anyones heartstrings?
That’s a depressing thought actually... I’m always being watched, yet there’s no-one around when I need someone to hold me and wipe away my tears... Actually, that would be kind of creepy... some random person coming out as I start to cry and wrapping their gorilla arms around me... I think I’d scream.
It would prove my theory though.
Oh CFO, CFO why must you watch me so... Come out come out wherever you are... Stuff... I know you’re hiding!!!
Somewhere... Watching me with your little spidery eyes... I still don’t know how you hat someone... or how one would go about glomping ones self.
I shall have to find out... yes... time for some experiments.

~Stissa Elorm~