It was already dark when the two sannin left the bar.

In fact it was so late it was approaching early from the other side.

To some it might have a been an embarrassing sign that even shinobi turn into fools near alcohol, to others it may have been a reassuring sign that even legendary shinobi are human.
To the sannin themselves it was a lightening of sorts, a freedom from others expectations and their dignified shinobi life style and a chance to just say and do what they want and have a valid excuse to be the complete asses they never get to be on duty.
The two trace a path down the darkened street like a slow motion sidewinder as both sannin try unsuccessfully to get the other to take their weight. A few drops of alcohol splash to the pavement as Jiraiya manages to steady himself for long enough to take a long gulp from the sake filled gourd tied loosely to his belt. The smaller sannin edges round a puddle disdainfully and takes a sip of his sake.

The orange lamps cast pools of light on the rough hewn rocks of the less impressive side streets as the sannin finally make their way back to the hotel they are staying that.
Tsunade has previously lost most of her drinking money at cards and is snoring like a pig three rooms over. Unsteadily Jiraiya points a finger at Orochimaru.

“We’re best friends jusht you and me” he slurs.

The snake sannin nods and fumbles through his pockets for the door key. Jiraiya hiccups then continues his rambling monologue.

“I mean, we’ve had some fights you and me but I’ve always kinda of admired you.”
Jiraiya mumbles. He waves a finger unsteadily. “That Tsunade… Sure she’s cute but she’s as likely to hit me as look at me. But you” he says, grappling his arms around
Orochimaru’s neck “We’re like kindred spirits or something.”

Orochimaru finally manages to unlock the door and, without it to lean on, the two immediately fall over inside.
After a few moments Orochimaru starts to laugh hysterically. There is a brief pause before Jiraiya joins in.

“It’s funny ‘coz it’s true.” Orochimaru laughs, still held in Jiraiya’s arms and sprawled on the floor.

“See you’re the only one that gets it.” Jiraiya mumbles, his arms still tight around Orochimaru’s neck but his face flat on the floor.

“Of course I get it. I’m a genius.” Orochimaru says smugly and a good deal more legibly then his companion.
“You’ve always been the genius.” Jiraiya says dejectedly.

“Well I suppose you have a kind of genius too.” Orochimaru says, waving his arms in an expressive but meaningless gesture. “It’s just a different kind of genius.”

There is a pause of gloomy silence and Orochimaru sighs internally as he hopes Jiraiya hasn’t gotten depressed enough to mope through the rest of the night.

“Yeah. I am a genius.” Jiraiya says smugly. Orochimaru rolls his eyes and manages to haul himself and the white-haired sannin into a loose sitting position. As soon as he is vaguely upright Jiraiya resumes drinking.

“You know you’re a lot prettier then Tsunade.” Jiraiya says, once again leaning heavily on Orochimaru’s shoulders.

Orochimaru laughs into his sake.
“Like that’s hard.”

Jiraiya also laughs and starts to slowly stroke his fingers through Orochimaru’s hair.

“After all Tsunade doesn’t have such pretty hair.”

Orochimaru knocks Jiraiya’s hand away irritably.
“Jiraiya we’ve been over this…Just because I have long hair doesn’t mean I’m a girl”

“I know.” Jiraiya says bluntly, returning to stroking the pale sannin’s hair.
Orochimaru murmurs something indistinct and relaxes against the bed. Jiraiya’s touch is soft and gentle and soothing. Nevertheless the white serpent strives to be snarky to protect his reputation.

“This is probably the closest you’ll ever get to touching a girl anyway.

“I would rather touch you.”

“Huh?” The serpent sannin slurs confused without a trace of his usual eloquence.

“Do you like me?” Jiraiya asks, twirling a strand of dark hair around his fingers.

“Uh…” Orochimaru says struggling to think of something. “Well despite the oafish way you charge around everywhere I’ve always admired your courage and the way the sunlight shines off your hair when we get out of the bath house is pretty and-”

Jiraiya cuts off Orochimaru’s next words using his tongue. For a few seconds they are almost motionless, the toad sannin’s hand curling in Orochimaru’s hair as the other softly strokes his cheek. Softly after a few stunned heated moments Jiraiya pulls away.

“And apparently you’re a great kisser.” Orochimaru continues before what has actually happened has time to percolate through the alcohol haze.

“J-Jirai-” The white haired sannin leans in, loosening the fine flower patterned robe draped around Orochimaru’s shoulders and wafting hot sake scented breath over snow white skin. The serpent twitches and feels a blush drift across his face.
Fighting the dull fog of alcohol as Jiraiya softly slips nimble fingers inside his robe Orochimaru struggles to form a coherent sentence.

Jiraiya while I appreciate your attentions I feel that I am not prepared for a relationship of this magnitude and I don’t want an action made while we are both inebriated to ruin our friendship.

Yes that sounds good.

Orochimaru opens his mouth to try it out but only has time to say Jiraiya’s name before he is once again cut off by a kiss. This time Jiraiya is less gentle as he hungrily shoves his tongue into Orochimaru’s mouth. Blinking muzzily the serpent reaches out his arms to push Jiraiya away only to find his hands are tightening around Jiraiya’s shoulders.

‘Wh-?’ he thinks muzzily as Jiraiya starts to suck on his throat.

‘Why aren’t I fighting?’

Jiraiya softly slips the delicate silk from Orochimaru’s shoulders

‘Why aren’t I stopping him? I know I could.’

Jiraiya’s hot breath wafts over his skin as he nips and licks at Orochimaru’s chest until his breathing speeds up and each n****e is rock hard.

‘Why the hell am I letting HIM top?!’

The toad sannin slings strong tanned arms around the snake sannin’s pale shoulder and pushes him to the wall, harshly slamming their bodies together. Whatever small part of Orochimaru that was still protesting is harshly shocked into silence.

__________________________________________________________

The sun had had been risen for hours when Tsunade rolled off her bed and into the pile of crumpled IOU’s and empty sake bottles.

Wincing she uses the small jutsu needed to surgically remove the excess alcohol from her bloodstream and winces in a brief moment of pain. She roughly fumbles around the floor for her clothes and pulls on the robe, still crumpled from a night on the floor and pulls out a grease-stained mission report.

Jiraiya had still been drinking when she had left.

Tsunade sighs.

Either way the mission report needs to be returned to the Hokage.
Hopefully Orochimaru can remember enough of the night to drag Jiraiya out of the bed of whatever whore he crawled in with last night.

“It’s time to get up.” She calls before pulling open the door.

Knowing of Orochimaru’s fixation on sake he won’t thank her she edges her way around the discarded bottles and clothes.

“Get up. We’ve have a mission report to-”

Tsunade pauses as she sees a sleeping and very clearly naked Jiraiya in Orochimaru’s bed with a very clearly naked Orochimaru asleep next to him.

Jiraiya yawns and stretches, rubbing his bloodshot eyes and dislodging Orochimaru.

“Hey Tsunade. I had this wonderful dream I was banging this chick with really long black hair and the hottest a** I have ever seen.” He flinches, expecting Tsunade to hit him for being such a pig but the blow comes from directly beside him.

“You complete and utter a**!” Orochimaru screams, fixing his hands firmly around Jiraiya’s throat and squeezing hard. “I’ll ******** KILL you! You b*****d!!”

Jiraiya pulls away. “What the hell are you talking…about…” He buries his head in his hands. “Oh god!” He moans from between his fingers. “Please tell me I didn’t…”

“If you do not have the decency to remember the actions of last night you may have the common decency not to incorrectly brag about it.” Orochimaru’s tone was cold enough to freeze nitrogen. The look in his eyes was beyond murderous, it was a rage that could burn away the heavens it was so violent and furious and…hurt.

Jiraiya, as always, didn’t notice it.

Tsunade does.

“Idiot!” She says and hits Jiraya herself.

Orochimaru’s hands tighten on the blankets until the knuckles stand out even whiter against his pale skin.

“Get…out.” He says so quietly it can barely be heard.

Tsunade takes the hint and hauls the still fuzzy headed Jiraiya onto her shoulders and leaves quickly.

A second later a sidetable is thrown through the door.