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Veldrin the Shadow Vice Captain
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 Posted: Wed Aug 17, 2011 2:07 pm
As the opening notes of Orgasmatron by Motorhead begin to play, the audience erupts in a storm of boos and the lights in the arena go dark, save for a single blood red spotlight in the center of the stage. The words "Major Devastation" form in blood across the titantron before fading into a montage of the most brutal moments of the Master of Disaster's EGW matches. I AM THE ONE, ORGASMATRON, THE OUTSTRETCHED, GRASPING HAND
MY IMAGE IS OF AGONY, MY SERVANTS RAPE THE LAND
OBSEQUIOUS AND ARROGANT, CLANDESTINE AND VAIN
TWO THOUSAND YEARS OF MISERY, OF TORTURE IN MY NAME
HYPOCRISY MADE PARAMOUNT, PARANOIA THE LAW
MY NAME IS CALLED RELIGION, SADISTIC, SACRED WHORE!He rises slowly from below the stage and lifts the EGW Championship belt high over his head in his left hand. As the lift stops, Major Devastation mockingly salutes the crowd as red, white and blue fountains of sparks spray around him and his alternating green and brown strobe lights begin flashing before he drapes the belt over his right shoulder and slowly starts making his way down the ramp. "Now making his way to the ring...weighing in at two-hundred and seventy pounds, from San Antonio, Texas...he is the EGW Champion, 'THE MASTER OF DISASTER' MAJOR DEVASTATION!"I TWIST THE TRUTH, I RULE THE WORLD, MY CROWN IS CALLED DECEIT
I AM THE EMPEROR OF LIES, YOU GROVEL AT MY FEET
I ROB YOU AND I SLAUGHTER YOU, YOUR DOWNFALL IS MY GAIN.
AND STILL YOU PLAY THE SYCOPHANT AND REVEL IN YOUR PAIN.
ALL MY PROMISES ARE LIES, AND ALL MY LOVE IS HATE
I AM THE POLITICIAN, AND I DECIDE YOUR FATE! As the champion slowly made his way down the ramp to the ring, drinking in the hatred of the fans, he continued to egg them on by taunting them every step of the way. I MARCH BEFORE A MARTYRED WORLD, AN ARMY FOR THE FIGHT
I SPEAK OF GREAT HEROIC DAYS, OF VICTORY AND MIGHT!
I HOLD A BANNER DRENCHED IN BLOOD, I URGE YOU TO BE BRAVE
I LEAD YOU TO YOUR DESTINY, I LEAD YOU TO YOUR GRAVE!
YOUR BONES WILL BUILD MY PALACES, YOUR EYES WILL STUD MY CROWN
FOR I AM MARS, THE GOD OF WAR, AND I WILL CUT YOU DOWN! As he reaches the side of the ring, he slides the belt underneath the bottom rope and performs a standing leap onto the ring apron before stepping between the top and middle ropes to enter the ring itself, retrieving the belt in the process. He climbs the turnbuckles and raises the strap high overhead in a Rock-like fashion while taunting the crowd before hopping down and snatching the microphone from the hand of the ring announcer.
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Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 1:18 pm
As the music died, and the lighting returned to normal, the new champion raised his mic with a huge smirk on his face.
"I told you so! I. TOLD. YOU. SO!" Devastation had to wait for the loud booing to quiet down enough for him to be heard again before he continued. "Oh shut your stinking sewer holes, you pukes! Did I not say that come Lucky Numbers, the EGW Championship would be back around my waist where it belongs?"
Major raised the belt high above his head and basked in the heat from the crowd for several moments. "Now I'm sure that you brainless imbeciles are aware, by now, of how I ABSOLUTELY DESTROYED Draze to take back MY TITLE! Of course, for those of you who missed it, let me take you shitbricks down memory lane...roll the footage, maggots!" With that, the video on the titantron switched to a replay of the main event at Lucky Numbers, where Draze was driven through an open steel chair by Major Devastation's Daisy Cutter, which was shown several times from multiple camera angles. After that, a second replay was shown of the final moments of the match, where the Master of Disaster delivered the Super Tigerbomb that he has dubbed the "Mother Of All Bombs" off of the top turnbuckle onto the base of the steel steps laying on the concrete floor below.
"All week, I've been bombarded with the same question over and over and over again: 'Was it really necessary to try to end Draze's career?' And do you know what my answer was every single time? ABSOLUTELY!!! He brought his destruction upon himself. When I drove his skull into the entrance ramp back at Empire, I did it to send a message -one that he apparently didn't get- and that message is that the EGW Championship is MINE, and that I will annihilate anyone who tries to take it from me. When he took the title -on a fluke, I might add- from me, he sealed his fate, and is now lying in a hospital bed with a broken neck! You worthless losers won't be seeing your little hero again any time soon.
Now then, enough talk of the past. In just a few minutes, it will be time for the main event, in which our clearly incompetent General Manager has decided to schedule me to face, not a proven title contender, not even a promising up-and-comer, but a DIVA! It would seem that he has absolutely no regard for the safety of his employees, considering that, knowing full well that I just got through brutalizing a multiple time former world champion, he puts me up against KJ Newfoundland's trophy girl. What the hell kind of challenge is that for the man who is at the top of the food chain around here? Regardless, I will not be held responsible when that little Barbie doll ends up getting broken."
With that being said, the champ dropped his mic and began making his way back toward the backstage area.
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Veldrin the Shadow Vice Captain
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