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Checks's Tale (do not post!)

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Mikau Kahn
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 4:06 pm


First off, I'd like you to know I want- no. I request feedback. So please read each chapter over and PM me with feedback, thanks!

Here's the character bios so far:

Checkered Grey: A calm minded pony in a usual good nature. Very lax about most things unless they hurt his morals. He is the main charactor, the story is told in his perspective, and his cutie mark is a Checkered Sign. He was born with it and spends the story finding out the use for it.

Kirax (temporary name): Another calm minded pony who can get anything done in he starts, and has no problem with that. He's Checks's (Ckecks = Checkered Grey) best friend and his cutie mark is a dollar sign. He was born rich and whenever he needed money, he could earn it within minutes, making his talent money.

Twilight Sparkle: One of the two mane6 that the duo knows and is friends with. Checks is her only rival in the intellect department, so they got to know each other quickly.
PostPosted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 4:07 pm


-------------------------------
---Chapter One
Introduction---
-------------------------------

"Hey KiraX, come here!"
...
"Are you even listening...?"
...
"Allright."
Then I- Oh, yea, introductions. I'm Checkered Grey. Let's see... I spend all my time around KiraX, our towns resential money man. He pays no attention to the fact that he's rich, but his specialty is being rich. His cutie mark, a dollar sign, proves it. Money comes naturally to him. Then there's me.
I was born with my cutie mark. It's very simple (a 2 by 2 segment of a checkers board). What does it mean? I don't know. All I know is I'm ponyville's resident genius (other than that Twilight)... Oh, I'm off topic! Back to the story.
"Allright."
Then I went over to KiraX and gave a sharp kick to the back, sending him a good 2 feet off of the bench. "Who-what-when-why-how-COUGH"
"Stop sleeping on the bench, we have to get to work" -silence-...
...
"Bah hah ha ha!" (both of us)
"C'mon Checks, we know we don't have to work! I got us covered!" As the richy boy pulls a wad from his pocket. "I know Kira, but I don't want people to think we're lazier than we already are." "I know, I know, I was toying with you. Let's check the odd-job board today."

-Escaped lab mice-
Some of my lab mice escaped, can you help me gather them?
~Twilight Sparkle

-Study of Cutie Marks-
I'm working on a study of cutie marks. If your's is different in any way, come by.
~Twilight Sparkle

-Dye testing-
I found a new way to dye anyponies coat and I need a test. Don't worry, it can be undone with... Reletively no marks :3
~Twilight Sparkle

*Me and Kirax stare at eachother*

And KiraX says "I guess we're getting lab mice for Twi again, aren't we?" "No wait Kira, look at the second one..." "So? Our cutie marks are nor-... Fine. We'll take it."

*Summery*
KiraX is rich, and my best friend.
I'm Checkered Grey, who has had a cutie mark from birth without knowing what it's for
We just decided to help Twilight in her study of cutie marks, in hopes of explaining mine.

Mikau Kahn
Vice Captain


Mikau Kahn
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 4:51 pm


----------------------------
---Chapter Two
Discovery---
----------------------------

We got to Twilight's house to find that, A) Mice were everywhere, B) Somepony walking away was half orange-half green, and

C) Twilight was buried, again, in a cluster buck of books. After digging her out, we exchanged the usual death-glares.
...
A minute passed.
...
Then five.
...
Ten.
...
Suddenly, Twilight burst into laughter signifying that I won (again). "So, somepony already helped test my dye, I assume

you two are here for the mice problem?" "Actually no, Checks here want's to help your cutie mark reserch, because he's had his

since birth and has no idea what it means."
She bolted inside in a Pinky-esk manner. A split second later she had an artist's drawing board and using magic sketched

me instantly into the paper. "Sorry about that, I needed a reference for when you're not here." "Oh, so you wanted a picture of my

hind quarters for 'reserch'?" She blushed. Alot. "N-no! I-I needed it to... Hur!" She picked up the drawing and smacked me upside

the head, with magic of course. I blacked out.
I woke up on the floor with Twilight and KiraX's heads drooping over mine. I got up and creaked my back, "Couldn't you put

me in a bed or on a chouch? -groan-." "Sorry, but we coudn't carry you up to the top floor onto the bed..." said Twi. Wait, said

Twi? "You can use magic!" "Oh, about that... Your cutie mark burnt my horn when I tried." "Yea Checks, be more considerate!" I

looked at her and saw ice packs on her horn's tip. "Oh, sorry, how bad does it hurt? Are you going to be okay?" "Okay? OKAY?! This

is fantastic!" *Me and KiraX exchange glares again* -more silence-. "I know now that not only did you get it in a strange manner,

but it has effects too! Ha haaa! Science." She said science with the utmost seriousness for all you readers out there.
I already knew that. I might be a simple earth pony, but I can move smaller things telepathically as though I had one. Not

willingly though, when it needs moved, it moves. Also, magic has never worked on me. I was dubbed a 'bully's bully' for setting

Violet Jazz's horn on fire when he tried to turm me purple. Oh, they're looking at me, better say something. "So, how do we tackle

this cutie mark issue?" "We don't, you do. Do everything that has to do with it until something clicks. If my research is right-"

"Wait, you already did research?" "Yup -super smile- while you were out, I read up on it and KiraX rounded up the mice before they

ate your mane." "How long was I out?" I now realized the large lump on my forehead from the painting. "Let's say it's been a few

hours." "Hours? I haven't even had lunch, and now it's dinnertime -pouty face-." "You go ahead and eat, I'll stay and study. Go

do... Whatever it is you do with checkered designs. *now muttering to herself* checkered designs aren't even a talent... They

aren'e even an obj-" I left. I didn't want to snoop around her self-chat. Me and KiraX got some dinner, his treat of course. Wait,

she never paid us!

*Summery*
Checks's cutie mark has anti magic properties, and telepathically moves things when neccesary.
Twilight ripped us, or KiraX, off.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 3:08 pm


------------------------------------
---Chapter Three
Less than success---
------------------------------------

I woke up in my hammock. I have a house, but it's more of a shed. I never really used it other to store some cloths and food. It's a cold-ish Autumn morning, so I went inside to grab a hand-made sweater. The design's purely mine, along with everything else in here, but that one girl at made it for me. I'm not to fond of the fasionista type, and she kept trying to embroil my jacket, so I never bothered to learn her name.
I went over to KiraX, who also slept in a mini-house. He might have insane amounts of money, but he never uses it. He flaunts it all the time, but he says he's saving the money for 'it'. Anyways, again I bucked the living buck out of him to wake him up.
"Ow! Dude, just wake me up like normal, please! Just once!"
"I did -glare-, stop accusing me!"
"-glare-"
"-glare-"
"Fine. Twi said-"
"Twilight."
"You call her Twi. Why can't I?"
"You're not a good enough friend."
"Fine. Twilight said we need to try to find out your cutie mark's meaning. Wanna play checkers?"
"You know just as well as I do that I suck at checkers. And chess."
"Where do we start then?"
"Where can 'I' start you mean, I need to do something alone."
"Fine, just don't get me arrested again."
I walked off twards the library. It's a public building, but no one considers it one still. As one of the two people that actually read, I still just walk in. Twi hates it when I do that, but technically she told me to learn, so I am.
I walked in carefully and slowly in an attempt to find anything checkered related. Sadly, I knocked over a book tower Twi had set up. Each book was about special cases of cutie marks. Twi didn't budge, but Spike was awake, still in his half-groggy status.
"Sup Spike?"
"Be quiet please, I'm trying to sleep"
"Sorry' I'll try."
Spike waddled back up stairs, every now and then hovering a bit. He's still a baby dragon, but he's learning to use those little wings. Anyways, I went searching for books related to checkered marks. Nothing other than a how-to guide to chess. Figures. On my way out, my mark started glowing so brightly I had to squint to see. Twi was down in a matter of seconds, screaming loudly, but I couldn't hear her. Everything but her and I were smashed into the walls and bookcases, when the bright light turned into perfect darkness. We were both fully conscious as Twi began to light the place up with her magic. We were in a endless room with a checked floor.
"Where are we?" I tried to keep my complexion, which was easy. As the room got dark again, I could tell Twi wasn't able to keep hers.
"Where are we?! How did you do that, you're not even a unicorn!" She was hyperventilating. I went over next to her to calm her down.
"Something touched me!" She blasted pure magic bolts into it, I mean me, sending me flying about a good 8 feet.
"Ow much. It was me." As I got up, I asked her to make a magic torch or something to keep the room lit. She made a magic fireplace. Good enough.
Twi went from histaric strait into examination mode. She found out that: A)this room went on forever, so there was no hurry to escape, B)we were alone, C)my cutie mark was gone.

*Summery*
Me and Twi were sent somewhere.
My cutie mark caused it and disappeared.

Mikau Kahn
Vice Captain

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