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 Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 11:42 am
Christopher Alice Powell hates a lot of things. Wally West, people who wear pajamas as clothes to his store, Lex Luthor....but nothing drives him nuts like fan fiction. Especially fan fiction that ends up in Lantern's.
It's the event that will drive Powell out of his mind, Return of the Revenge of the Fanfic that Wouldn't Die! Rules are simple. Create a fanfic and submit it here. Whatever drives Powell the most nuts wins. Well...it's a little more complicated than that but that's the gist.
Rules
1) Most important...follow TOS. I hope I don't have to explain this.
2) All fanfics have to be posted in this thread by the end of Friday, May 27th.
3) What you need to submit:
a) Pen name(because you don't you're real name of a fanfic) Example: when Doreen Green wrote her Hellboy/Brainy fix it was RedandGreenFan.
b) Title
c) Bookjacket summary
d) A sample scene from your creation
4) The first contest with this premise had no rules on who to use. The second one was Halloween themed. In this one the theme, if you will, will be cross universes. You may not use two characters from the same universe. Superman and Batman are not allowed but Superman and Thor are. So mix Marvel and DC or Dark Horse and Top Cow or any variation thereof.
5) Linda is being punished for making 616 Powell boink Zombie Powell. She'll help me judge on what would drive Powell nuts the most. The winner will get a nifty letter or evolving item. If Linda and I violently disagree, the will be a Thunderdome match between us....or if I'll award two prizes.
6) HAVE FUN!
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Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 12:09 pm
For someone who "hates" fanfics, Powell sure reads a lot of 'em . . . .
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Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 8:18 am
Wow, cross-over possibilities? I may have a plot bunny biting at my ankles, that may not be a good thing for the characters I want to use. ninja I may join but I'll see how it goes with my free time.
My old fanfics are notoriously bad, fear the 19 year old with web access! I may go back to my bad habits.
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Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 1:21 pm
Jennifer_Walters Wow, cross-over possibilities? I may have a plot bunny biting at my ankles, that may not be a good thing for the characters I want to use. ninja I may join but I'll see how it goes with my free time. My old fanfics are notoriously bad, fear the 19 year old with web access! I may go back to my bad habits.SHULKIE! scream The Green Goodness is back! blaugh
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Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 9:27 am
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF I gotta get to work on this.
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Posted: Wed May 25, 2011 6:50 pm
x
xGrease Fire (in your Pants)
by
MapleLeafxOliveLeaf
Jacket:
One night, our hero finds himself to be the lusty conquest of a man who refuses to take no for an answer. Will he escape his greasy fate, or will he find this lover well lubricated for his pleasure?
Snippet:
There was a grease spot on the counter.
If there was anything Wallace hated, it was most certainly a grease spot on his counter. “Dammit Scott, you got bacon grease on the counter.”
As he wiped it off, he remembered that Scott no longer lived there. In fact, he now lived alone. Wallace pursed his lips, then brought the cloth that he had been using to clean to his nose. It didn’t smell like bacon. Strange. It actually smelled kind of fragrant, almost like a perfume. Had a woman with an overly perfumed bottom been sitting on his counter?
Wallace shrugged, then headed to the fridge, getting out his grade A boozohol so that he could make himself a martini. Combating grease was tough, and it required an adult beverage boost. And maybe, he’d need to make out with someone later. Good idea Wallace. Good idea.
With a fresh martini in hand, he slid out of his clothes and into the shower. He thought he heard someone say, “Nice,” but he might have been hearing something. Like, residual sound from the TV or something. He didn’t know. He left the martini on the sink counter, then undressed and got in the shower.
When he emerged, he was disturbed to find his martini gone, and a note written in a language he was unfamiliar with. Had aliens abducted his martini? Wallace gasped, and dropped the note hastily in the garbage before wrapping his bathrobe tightly about his waist and tying it.
When he emerged from the bathroom, he found something hanging off the doorknob. It was something hanging from a hanger. Wallace picked it up to get a better view. It was a pair of bibby overalls with another note in the indecipherable language written on it. The paper was smudged with grease. Lifting it to his nose, he found that it had the same perfumey smell. Was someone else in his apartment?
It reminded Wallace of the movie “Scent of a Woman”, not that he had actually seen the movie, but more like he’d heard the title thrown about a couple times and remembered it.
The bibby overalls were just plain heinous though. He hung them back up on the doorknob, then continued across his apartment to find a smudged handprint on his wall. Where had that come from? He frowned at the nasty streak, following it as it …disappeared into his bedroom.
Into his bedroom.
INTO HIS BEDROOM. OH GOD. HIS BEDROOM.
Swallowing hard, Wallace took a hesitant step into his bedroom.
“I have been waiting for you,” a man’s voice boomed from his bed, “Did you get my present? I hope it is your side my little Maple Sugar Buttsex Fairy.”
On Wallace’s bed was a Greek God drinking his martini. He did not know if he should be aroused or afraid. Very afraid. x
x
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Posted: Wed May 25, 2011 7:24 pm
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Posted: Wed May 25, 2011 7:49 pm
I'm not sure if I should say "Poor Achilles" or "Poor Wallace." Or both. xd
But I want to read the rest!
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Posted: Wed May 25, 2011 7:54 pm
FINALLY! I was getting nervous that I would get no entries. sweatdrop
I am extending the deadline to May 31st in case we have stragglers. HINT HINT! scream
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 3:09 pm
Maybe. >_>
Depends on my weekend.
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2011 5:12 am
((I feel so dirty writing this...I don't think I'll ever be clean again.))
Squidgy Snicks Reborn
By Green Ravenz Nevermore
Jacket
It was a dark and lonely night of terrible storms and unwholesome dreams. Where a Canukle and a little dead girl come to meet and fall in love. Their love is pure and knows no bounds by age or death. It is not for the likes of you and no matter of the Gods to question such devotion that has sprung up between this Wolverine and Adorable woman trapped in a dead girl’s body. To be over come by her making a wish to transform herself into a young teenager, she can be the little dead girl no longer! Lenore/Wolverine!
Extract
The shadows danced in the cave as the lightening flickered and slowly Logan looked up to the altar of Xanadu. This was where he had been sent from the depths of hell to here. His one hope to revive his friend, whom he loved dearly. He placed the small body on the tablet below the altar. Blue light sparkled as the Altar came to life.
“Name your wish! You know of the price that must be paid!”
“I know.” Logan grimaced. “But I would watch that movie with you 100 times over if it meant my soul mate could live again and be reborn in an older body.”
“An interesting proposition, but the price of just once will be enough. As I suspect you are not able to take on the awesomeness of a movie starring Olivia Newton John on rollerskates.”
The Altar light got brighter and the shining light engulfed Wolverine and he was taken into the light as the images washed over his brain.
One hour and 33 minutes later the light exploded into sparkles and Logan was thrown out and stumbled onto his knees.
“Is it over bub?” He groaned.
The Altar sighed it had not found a friend to watch it’s favourite movie with. One more wish done another how many more hundreds to go.
“So few can appreciate the beauty and many joys to be had… but look up Logan, your girl awakens.”
He glanced across to where the stone cold tablet where the still body had once lay. Now there looking around her in her usual amazement and the world sat a fully grown Lenore. Her large eyes seemed to shine in the candle light. Those eyes met his and she squealed in joy.
“Snooky!!” She stumbled across to embrace him. Her new legs were still felt unsure and she fell into his strong arms. “I was waiting for you for such a long time.”
“It’s over now, Lenore, we can be together forever!”
“Yesh,” She smiled. “We’ve both lived so long and yet are memories are like squishy squid monsters trying to strangle each other!”
“We can make new memories, together.”
Lenore laughed, “I’d like that!”
They walked out of the cave into the dark moonlight night. He could see her face a little clearly now. It was still round and pale but it was all the more beautiful for being aged.
“You still have that cute little black nose!” Logan said with a smile.
“You can have it if you like!” Lenore said taking her nose off her face and handing it to him.
“Eh, thanks but it looks better attached to you.” He closed her hand that held her twitching nose and pushed it back. “How else would you be able to smell the flowers I plan to give you!”
“Oh, you say the most embarrassing things!” Lenore squealed and pushed him away, blushing with embarrassment.
Logan tripped and fell down a cliff.
“Oopsie!” Lenore peered down to see the crumbled body of Logan. “Are you okay Snooky?”
“Yeah…” Logan groaned. “I’m getting better…”
“Wait there, I’ll come down and snap your spine back into place!” Lenore said and made her way down the cliff. “It’s going to make nice sounds I’m sure!”
Unknown to the pair by the cave there lurked in the bushes someone that had seen the whole thing. Two beady button eyes glistened in the moonlight and watched some more as the lovers played.
“Oh Lenore…” It sighed.
00000000000000000000000000
*runs off to wash*
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2011 9:19 am
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2011 2:10 pm
(( I'm sorry Wally and Chris... I couldn't help myself xd )) When Wally Met Chris By: Evil Cute Mistress Jacket When Chris Powell goes on vacation to San Francisco the last thing he expected was to be stranded at Titan's Tower. This where he has his first encounter with a speedster whom he finds absolutely annoying... and yet iuntriguing. Snippet: It was bright sunny day in San Francisco when the Titans were having a barbeque at Titan’s Tower. Titans new and old were all there to eat, drink, and have a good time. One titan however, Zatara, was inside by himself studying old magic books and had no interest in interacting with the other Titans. He had recently become interested in potions and was trying to make one. This was his first attempt and he was very nervous. Meanwhile outside while Beast Boy just had started a conga line a boat had stopped right on the island and Superboy and Cyborg went to go see what was up.Cyborg: What seems to be the problem? Captain: We were just taking these tourists around the bay when we had an engine malfunction. Cyborg: Don’t worry we’ll have this thing fixed in a Flash. Then suddenly Flash ran up to the scene creating a cloud of dust which left one passenger, a Chris Powell coughing in the dust.Flash: Did someone say Flash? Chris: Excuse *cough* me*cough**hack**cough**COUGH**HACK * Flash immediately took Chris hand and shook it vigorously. Anger suddenly rose in every part of Chris Powell’s very being. Never had he so hated or so detested such a man as he did the young speedster in a crimson red suit. This… this hero was just so impulsive and insulting blowing dust right in his face.Flash: Hitherecitizendon’tworryI’ll getthisfixed…. Are you okay? Chris:…My….throat. Flash: Oh.. I’m sorry let’s go inside and get a drink. Flash guided Chris inside the tower where he saw Zatara with three glasses of what he assumed to be water. He two glasses and gave Chris one.Flash: “Bottoms up” Zatara: “Wait that’s not..” It was too late Flash and Chris had drank a glass of the liquid. Flash looked at Chris…Chris looked at flash. Chris: “Do my eyes deceive me? Who is this crimson god like figure… So handsome…so perfect’ Flash: “ Your eyes… they are the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.” What happened next was all a blur to the young Powell but when he woke up he found himself feeling swore all over and all he could make of the figure next to him was some red hair. Chris: “What? A red head? I hope she’s cute at least.” Chris then spotted what looked like a glass of water to the red head. He walked over and closed his eyes and took a sip. Then went around the room finding his clothes and it was then Wally woke up. He didn’t even see Powell but saw the glass of water and gulped the rest of it down.
Right after this moment before Wally or Chris even knew what happened Donna, Cassie, and Achilles busted in to the room.Donna: “ Wally, Cassie and Achilles were going to leave. They just wanted to say thank you for throwing such a GREAT barbeque.” Both Wally and Chris looked over at them and what they saw was the glorious god that was Achilles. The two of them both had huge grins on their faces.Achilles: “Sister why are they looking at me like that? Donna grabbed Cassie. Donna: “Okay Cassie…I think we better leave.” The two amazons left and Cassie looked at Donna.Cassie: “What’s going on in there?” Donna: “There certain things we’re better off not knowing” Zatara comes up behind them.Zatara: “ At least I know my potion works.”
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Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2011 5:58 pm
Oops! I almost forgot to award a winner! Everyone did a great job. It was hard to pick a winner among these three nightmarish scenarios. Achilles rape is always horrifying( xp ) and the idea of Powell and his nemesis, Wally, is so wrong( talk2hand )....but the judges have agree that Jennifer Walters is the winner. The use of Lenore is original, funny, and disturbing all at once. She'll get a nice letter. Thanks for playing!
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Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:07 pm
Thank You! heart
My inner-teen is now sated but I still feel dirty for writing these horrors. Such terrible out of character moments and out of continuality since Lenore is truly dead and she's never coming back.
*goes off to wash some more*
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