Welcome to Gaia! ::

As the opening notes of Orgasmatron by Motorhead begin to play, the audience erupts in a storm of boos and the lights in the arena go dark, save for a single blood red spotlight in the center of the stage. The words "Major Devastation" form in blood across the titantron before fading into a montage of the most brutal moments of the Master of Disaster's EGW matches.

I AM THE ONE, ORGASMATRON, THE OUTSTRETCHED, GRASPING HAND
MY IMAGE IS OF AGONY, MY SERVANTS RAPE THE LAND
OBSEQUIOUS AND ARROGANT, CLANDESTINE AND VAIN
TWO THOUSAND YEARS OF MISERY, OF TORTURE IN MY NAME
HYPOCRISY MADE PARAMOUNT, PARANOIA THE LAW
MY NAME IS CALLED RELIGION, SADISTIC, SACRED WHORE!

He rises slowly from below the stage and lifts the EGW Championship belt high over his head in his left hand. As the lift stops, Major Devastation mockingly salutes the crowd as red, white and blue fountains of sparks spray around him and his alternating green and brown strobe lights begin flashing before he drapes the belt over his right shoulder and slowly starts making his way down the ramp.

"Now making his way to the ring...weighing in at two-hundred and seventy pounds, from San Antonio, Texas...he is the NEW EGW Champion, 'THE MASTER OF DISASTER' MAJOR DEVASTATION!"

I TWIST THE TRUTH, I RULE THE WORLD, MY CROWN IS CALLED DECEIT
I AM THE EMPEROR OF LIES, YOU GROVEL AT MY FEET
I ROB YOU AND I SLAUGHTER YOU, YOUR DOWNFALL IS MY GAIN.
AND STILL YOU PLAY THE SYCOPHANT AND REVEL IN YOUR PAIN.
ALL MY PROMISES ARE LIES, AND ALL MY LOVE IS HATE
I AM THE POLITICIAN, AND I DECIDE YOUR FATE!

As the new champion slowly made his way down the ramp to the ring, drinking in the hatred of the fans, he continued to egg them on by taunting them every step of the way.

I MARCH BEFORE A MARTYRED WORLD, AN ARMY FOR THE FIGHT
I SPEAK OF GREAT HEROIC DAYS, OF VICTORY AND MIGHT!
I HOLD A BANNER DRENCHED IN BLOOD, I URGE YOU TO BE BRAVE
I LEAD YOU TO YOUR DESTINY, I LEAD YOU TO YOUR GRAVE!
YOUR BONES WILL BUILD MY PALACES, YOUR EYES WILL STUD MY CROWN
FOR I AM MARS, THE GOD OF WAR, AND I WILL CUT YOU DOWN!

As he reaches the side of the ring, he slides the belt underneath the bottom rope and performs a standing leap onto the ring apron before stepping between the top and middle ropes to enter the ring itself, retrieving the belt in the process. He climbs the turnbuckles and raises the strap high overhead in a Rock-like fashion while taunting the crowd before hopping down, handing the belt to the referee and waiting for his partner and opponents to make their entrances.

(I was waiting for Draze to post first but I'll go on ahead. I wonder if he forgot. PMed him about it).

The arena calmed slightly allowing for the noise to die down just enough for a laugh to rip through the air followed by a whistle that was steadily growing familiar to the crowd as the mash up of Since Super Bill Was Killed I Feel Good began to play.

The ever enthusiastic crowd jumped onto their feet as the woman earlier formally introduced as March Hare somewhat energetically entered the stage this time sans her pet rat Dormy.

"And their opponent hailing in from...um...Wonderland? March Hare!"
She twirled once making the ends of her already short skirt lift before skipping a little as she bounced down the ramp waving to the crowd and blowing kisses while heading down towards the ring her bunny ears flopping along the way.

Looking at Jak and man known as Major Devastation she winked before easily climbing up the side of the ring then climbing further up until she was sitting on the top rope. Hooking her feet under the second rope she leaned backwards until she was almost completely horizontal blowing yet another kiss to the camera before sitting up straight again. With a laugh she hopped down and moved towards their corner.

((I wasn't aware that he was going through a rough patch. No one around here bothered to mention it. And I wasn't giving him a hard time about it either. I had assumed that he had forgotten given that sometimes such a thing like forgetting happens. So don't be condescending, snide, or uppity because I'm not in the loop of these things...or I don't know you didn't think to say 'Hey he's going through somethings right now, perhaps I should bring this up so that things could be put on hold or put off.'

By now you've figured I really hate it when people sound like that towards me or anyone during a situation they didn't know much about. It really brings out the b***h in me. So please next time chose your words more carefully.))

Hare suddenly felt like she would rather someone throw Tabasco sauce in her face than endure her new partner in a match she had absolutely nothing to do with in the first place.

Taking on a bored look she scaled the turnbuckle and took a seat before picking at the dirt beneath her nails.

The EGW Champion was obviously less than impressed by the newcomer, as evidenced by the bored expression plastered across his face. He went into his corner for a quick huddle with his tag partner for the evening.

"So, do you want to start things off, or should I?"

Jak took a quick glance at their opponents before turning her attention back to Major Devastation.

"If it's alright with you, I'd like to start first."

Jak jumped down from her perch on the turnbuckle and stood up.