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Call Me Apple Vice Captain
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 Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 8:46 pm
YES I FEEL THIS IS TOPIC WORTHY ninja This is a controversial book, "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother" by Amy Chua. It is about how she feels the Chinese parenting style is better than most Western ways. I will also post a basic over view of the book from GoodReads.Com. I have not yet read it myself but I plan to soon! Quote: All decent parents want to do what's best for their children. What Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother reveals is that the Chinese just have a totally different idea of how to do that. Western parents try to respect their children's individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions and providing a nurturing environment. The Chinese believe that the best way to protect your children is by preparing them for the future and arming them with skills, strong work habits, and inner confidence. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother chronicles Chua's iron-willed decision to raise her daughters, Sophia and Lulu, her way-the Chinese way-and the remarkable results her choice inspires.
Here are some things Amy Chua would never allow her daughters to do:
• have a playdate
• be in a school play
• complain about not being in a school play
• not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama
• play any instrument other than the piano or violin
• not play the piano or violin
The truth is Lulu and Sophia would never have had time for a playdate. They were too busy practicing their instruments (two to three hours a day and double sessions on the weekend) and perfecting their Mandarin.
Of course no one is perfect, including Chua herself. Witness this scene:
"According to Sophia, here are three things I actually said to her at the piano as I supervised her practicing:
1. Oh my God, you're just getting worse and worse.
2. I'm going to count to three, then I want musicality.
3. If the next time's not PERFECT, I'm going to take all your stuffed animals and burn them!"
But Chua demands as much of herself as she does of her daughters. And in her sacrifices-the exacting attention spent studying her daughters' performances, the office hours lost shuttling the girls to lessons-the depth of her love for her children becomes clear. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother is an eye-opening exploration of the differences in Eastern and Western parenting- and the lessons parents and children everywhere teach one another Have you read this book?
For our Chinese members, do you feel this adequetley shows the general parenting style of Chinese families?
Do you think that Western parents have made a big mistake in our relaxed way of parenting? (I know the parenting style varies with each family, but as a whole, our culture is more relaxed with this generation)
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 8:59 pm
 Oh I've heard of it. I read an article about it some while ago.
Someone made a thread on deviantArt regarding that, and one of the people who actually read the book said something about how Amy Chua moves away from Chinese parenting towards the end of the book or something, and that one of her daughters decided to give up music and take up tennis instead.
But anyway, I don't get why Chua would limit her daughters like that. No playdates? Was she trying to make them live a lonely life without friends or something? And how can they be 1st in every subject? Everyone knows that there's no such thing as two 1st chairs in an orchestra.
EDIT: Found an article where Sophia responds to the controversy regarding her mother's book.
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 9:06 pm
I'm really happy this is satire, cause if it was real this woman is CAH-RAZY.
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 9:08 pm
Pandora the Wonderful I'm really happy this is satire, cause if it was real this woman is CAH-RAZY. No, this is how this lady raised her kids. They're daughters ages 15 & 18. She's also a University professor mrgreen
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Call Me Apple Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 9:17 pm
Pandora the Wonderful I'm really happy this is satire, cause if it was real this woman is CAH-RAZY. It's not satire--Amy Chua really did raise her daughters this way. gonk In a later interview, she claims that she regret doing all this...but then when asked the question of whether she would do it again, she said she would. :/
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 9:23 pm
Soprano Mochi Kitty Pandora the Wonderful I'm really happy this is satire, cause if it was real this woman is CAH-RAZY. It's not satire--Amy Chua really did raise her daughters this way. gonk In a later interview, she claims that she regret doing all this...but then when asked the question of whether she would do it again, she said she would. :/ She said she regretted it!? I did not know that.
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Call Me Apple Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 9:27 pm
Call Me Apple Pandora the Wonderful I'm really happy this is satire, cause if it was real this woman is CAH-RAZY. No, this is how this lady raised her kids. They're daughters ages 15 & 18. She's also a University professor mrgreen Are yous erious/??? I Heard it was satire...I'm so scared now gonk
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 10:10 pm
Pandora the Wonderful Call Me Apple Pandora the Wonderful I'm really happy this is satire, cause if it was real this woman is CAH-RAZY. No, this is how this lady raised her kids. They're daughters ages 15 & 18. She's also a University professor mrgreen Are yous erious/??? I Heard it was satire...I'm so scared now gonk Actually... Sophia Chua Dear Tiger Mom, You’ve been criticized a lot since you published your memoir, “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.” One problem is that some people don’t get your humor. They think you’re serious about all this, and they assume Lulu and I are oppressed by our evil mother. That is so not true. Every other Thursday, you take off our chains and let us play math games in the basement. But for real, it’s not their fault. No outsider can know what our family is really like. They don’t hear us cracking up over each other’s jokes. They don’t see us eating our hamburgers with fried rice. They don’t know how much fun we have when the six of us — dogs included — squeeze into one bed and argue about what movies to download from Netflix.
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Call Me Apple Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 10:17 pm
Kanashii Sakura Uta Sophia Chua Dear Tiger Mom, You’ve been criticized a lot since you published your memoir, “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.” One problem is that some people don’t get your humor. They think you’re serious about all this, and they assume Lulu and I are oppressed by our evil mother. That is so not true. Every other Thursday, you take off our chains and let us play math games in the basement. But for real, it’s not their fault. No outsider can know what our family is really like. They don’t hear us cracking up over each other’s jokes. They don’t see us eating our hamburgers with fried rice. They don’t know how much fun we have when the six of us — dogs included — squeeze into one bed and argue about what movies to download from Netflix.
Awwwww heart
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 10:24 pm
In middle school (grades 6-8 where I live, i.e. about ages 11-14) I wasn't allowed to have sleepovers at all, and only have play-dates once every other week. (However I *did* get to spend an hour or two after school in a local coffee shop studying with friends- my mother was friends with the manager, who reported on our activities.) I also couldn't choose my electives...I actually didn't have any. I had to choose an academy to enroll in at my school instead- science( biggrin ) or humanities, which ate up elective time (and frequently lunch times...which I came not to regret as time wore on.) I had to play an instrument, but I did get to choose which I wanted to play. C's were not acceptable, B's were "we know you can do better, so why didn't you?" (unless they knew I'd really genuinely tried), and there were times when, to my displeasure, I was made to re-do projects completely until they were good enough, and until my parents were sure I'd given it full and even extra effort.
After middle school, my parents cut down on the restrictions. I believe the point of all that was to teach me how to study, be committed, and to do my work efficiently/well the first time around, as well as to show me what good can come out of doing your best and 'going the extra mile.'
Summers have always been pretty free though...which was/is nice.
Oh yeah: although I kind of begrudged being forced to play an instrument initially, I started to actually like it...there were also benefits, of course.
I think Ms. Chua is kind of...intense. O_O Toning some of what she did, that I've read about so far, might not be a bad idea at all. (Burn stuffed animals? No plays? @_@ ... ) I understand that she wants the best for her children, but eh...some things could have been a little less intense. >< *shudder*
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Henneth Annun Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 10:30 pm
Call Me Apple Kanashii Sakura Uta Sophia Chua Dear Tiger Mom, You’ve been criticized a lot since you published your memoir, “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.” One problem is that some people don’t get your humor. They think you’re serious about all this, and they assume Lulu and I are oppressed by our evil mother. That is so not true. Every other Thursday, you take off our chains and let us play math games in the basement. But for real, it’s not their fault. No outsider can know what our family is really like. They don’t hear us cracking up over each other’s jokes. They don’t see us eating our hamburgers with fried rice. They don’t know how much fun we have when the six of us — dogs included — squeeze into one bed and argue about what movies to download from Netflix.
Awwwww heart
I kind of have a different opinion on Chua now after I read that letter from her daughter. I don't know how Lulu feels about her mother's parenting method, but Sophia seemed to appreciate it. And from reading that, I now know that Chua is not all cracked up like she seems to be and that she's actually lenient sometimes.
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 10:34 pm
Even reading the second thing it still sounds somewhat horrible.
I mean, shouldn't kids have fun every now and then? They're kids right?
I understand wanting your kids to do well and work as hard as they can, but to me that just seems too overboard.
I think the kids should have had more freedom and a bit more choice.
Instead of just piano or violin I'd be nice to have a bigger list to choose from and practicing for as long as they did each day is probably usually the amount of time I might spend on homework and I don't even really study that often.
Kinda reminds me how my school news paper just had some article about these twins in my school who are like super ahead and getting good grades. It said they study about 4-5 hours a day. (I think homework is kinda included in study.) I kinda couldn't help but wonder when I saw that if that's their choice or it's also partly their parents, but I think they're at least allowed to hang out with other people.
I hope that sounds ok, I couldn't really seem to form my thoughts that well while I was writing this. I tried to include what I said to someone else before when I was talking about this, but I probably forgot a thing or two.
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Posted: Mon Feb 07, 2011 11:41 pm
krissti_neo_angel_ti Even reading the second thing it still sounds somewhat horrible. I mean, shouldn't kids have fun every now and then? They're kids right? I understand wanting your kids to do well and work as hard as they can, but to me that just seems too overboard. I think the kids should have had more freedom and a bit more choice. Instead of just piano or violin I'd be nice to have a bigger list to choose from and practicing for as long as they did each day is probably usually the amount of time I might spend on homework and I don't even really study that often. Kinda reminds me how my school news paper just had some article about these twins in my school who are like super ahead and getting good grades. It said they study about 4-5 hours a day. (I think homework is kinda included in study.) I kinda couldn't help but wonder when I saw that if that's their choice or it's also partly their parents, but I think they're at least allowed to hang out with other people. I hope that sounds ok, I couldn't really seem to form my thoughts that well while I was writing this. I tried to include what I said to someone else before when I was talking about this, but I probably forgot a thing or two.
Eh, studying 4-5 hours a day isn't that much to me, especially if they spend 1 hour on every subject. That was how much I spent doing all my homework from all my classes when I was in middle and high school--1-2 hours for math, 1 hour for English (or 3 if I'm typing up an essay), 1 hour for science, etc. I always needed an hour to finish my homework for every single academic subject I took.
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 12:06 am
Kanashii Sakura Uta krissti_neo_angel_ti Even reading the second thing it still sounds somewhat horrible. I mean, shouldn't kids have fun every now and then? They're kids right? I understand wanting your kids to do well and work as hard as they can, but to me that just seems too overboard. I think the kids should have had more freedom and a bit more choice. Instead of just piano or violin I'd be nice to have a bigger list to choose from and practicing for as long as they did each day is probably usually the amount of time I might spend on homework and I don't even really study that often. Kinda reminds me how my school news paper just had some article about these twins in my school who are like super ahead and getting good grades. It said they study about 4-5 hours a day. (I think homework is kinda included in study.) I kinda couldn't help but wonder when I saw that if that's their choice or it's also partly their parents, but I think they're at least allowed to hang out with other people. I hope that sounds ok, I couldn't really seem to form my thoughts that well while I was writing this. I tried to include what I said to someone else before when I was talking about this, but I probably forgot a thing or two.
Eh, studying 4-5 hours a day isn't that much to me, especially if they spend 1 hour on every subject. That was how much I spent doing all my homework from all my classes when I was in middle and high school--1-2 hours for math, 1 hour for English (or 3 if I'm typing up an essay), 1 hour for science, etc. I always needed an hour to finish my homework for every single academic subject I took. Wow. Gah *feels so lazy*. I need to get better at that. : / Is that just how long it took you to do your homework or studying too?
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 12:12 am
krissti_neo_angel_ti Kanashii Sakura Uta krissti_neo_angel_ti Even reading the second thing it still sounds somewhat horrible. I mean, shouldn't kids have fun every now and then? They're kids right? I understand wanting your kids to do well and work as hard as they can, but to me that just seems too overboard. I think the kids should have had more freedom and a bit more choice. Instead of just piano or violin I'd be nice to have a bigger list to choose from and practicing for as long as they did each day is probably usually the amount of time I might spend on homework and I don't even really study that often. Kinda reminds me how my school news paper just had some article about these twins in my school who are like super ahead and getting good grades. It said they study about 4-5 hours a day. (I think homework is kinda included in study.) I kinda couldn't help but wonder when I saw that if that's their choice or it's also partly their parents, but I think they're at least allowed to hang out with other people. I hope that sounds ok, I couldn't really seem to form my thoughts that well while I was writing this. I tried to include what I said to someone else before when I was talking about this, but I probably forgot a thing or two.
Eh, studying 4-5 hours a day isn't that much to me, especially if they spend 1 hour on every subject. That was how much I spent doing all my homework from all my classes when I was in middle and high school--1-2 hours for math, 1 hour for English (or 3 if I'm typing up an essay), 1 hour for science, etc. I always needed an hour to finish my homework for every single academic subject I took. Wow. Gah *feels so lazy*. I need to get better at that. : / Is that just how long it took you to do your homework or studying too?
Yep, especially with math. I'm not the best at math, so it takes me 10-15 minutes to work out a problem. Assign me 30 problems from the math book, and I'll be spending an hour or so to complete it (or if I can't be arsed to solve a particular problem after several trial and errors, flip to the back of the book and copy the answer). --;
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