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 Posted: Mon Dec 06, 2010 8:22 pm
First off, I've only been in three relationships, total.
I got into the first one by chance. He was a wussy.
I wanted to dump him, but I couldn't find the right words.
My friend told me what to say, so I used those words.
In the time I was around this friend of mine, I could only be his friend. No one knew I liked him in a loving sence.
Before I was dating my second boyfriend, I had the perfect chance to ask him out... but I didn't. I wanted to stay single, but someone threw themself at me and I caught him. This guy turned out to be a lying, cheating, no-good jerk. Again, my friend was there to help me. I told my friend I loved him and that I wanted to date him, but he said "no. Right now I dating someone else." I was upset, but I accepted this and I waited. Then, while we were both dating someone else, my other friend started being a b***h toward my now proclaimed crush. I told her to (excuse the language) ******** off. She picked a fight with me, and I told her again "******** off." The more I said it, the farther away I stepped. Like I was about to charge at her and pound her face in. We're getting a bit off-topic here...
My crush dumped his girlfriend. She then disappeared, and we have not heard from her since then. Later that same month, I was on the phone with him when, out of the blue, he asked me out. I told him "you timed that wrong. You know I'm already dating someone." and he said "then why not friends for benefits?" which I accepted.
During our time together, he taught me many things about life.
Things I may never have learned alone. But still, he decided to dump me as well. Even months after dumping me, I was still happy to hear him say "I love you."
Now, having been friends for so long that we can now predict each other's every thought, I just heard through the grapevine that he is now dating another girl.
I feel heartbroken. I want to cry, but I can't because my mom is sitting in the kitchen, glaring at me. It's bad enough she's mad at me, so if I start crying, she'll start yelling at me.
I feel angry. Not only because he didn't tell me about this girl, but because he told me just yesterday that he loves me.
I am sad. All my life, I've been known as a total loser. Now I think it's true. That the most kind, sweet guy I've ever met isn't telling me "I'm dating somebody now."
I want to kill myself because of this pain. I've never had this happen- EVER!
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Posted: Mon Dec 06, 2010 8:25 pm
im soo sorry your in pain right now but i believe it will get better for you
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Bang Bang Kitty Lincon Crew
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Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 1:26 pm
*Hugs*
Everything will be Ok. Have a good cry when you can and vent. And remember that it does get better, you just have to give it time!
heart
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Posted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 7:24 am
My first boyfriend I was with for 11 months. He emotionally abused me and I came super close to suicide on quite a few occasions. He called me fat, stupid, and I dropped almost ten pounds in about three or four days. In other words, not the greatest experience of my life.
My second boyfriend was there for me, but dumped me after about 3 weeks because he "just didn't feel feel it". Then, my first boyfriend (now ex) started threatening my life (literally) and the school didn't do s**t about it. When everything finally got taken care of, I was put into a class that I am now failing because I could not catch up on the work and I still have nightmares that he is going to rape and then kill me.
But now that I'm with my girlfriend... everything is great. She treats me well, she is supportive, she is everything I ever wanted in a man, in a girl! lol. And all I had to do was keep going and keep meeting new people. She has my complete trust and all of my love and though it may hurt, it may take a few tries to get that. We haven't been dating for long but I know that if we were to break up it would still be worth it because she has made everything so much more bearable and easy. It is as easy as breathing and I hope that you find someone like that soon. Trust me, suicide is not the answer. I have had so many suicidal thoughts over the past three years... but what kept me from doing it is knowing that the perfect person could be right around the corner and then me leaving would leave that person empty handed. Keep going, if you ever need to vent we at the guild will help.
<33
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Posted: Tue Dec 28, 2010 6:19 pm
White_crow2408 All my life, I've been known as a total loser. Now I think it's true. That the most kind, sweet guy I've ever met isn't telling me "I'm dating somebody now." I want to kill myself because of this pain. I've never had this happen- EVER! There are times in life where we feel like that, total and complete losers. Life is full of surprises and experiences that gives opportunities to find and discover who we truly are. The best things about relationships is that we can use those to reflect on and learn what we like, dislike, and change about ourselves. I've been through a few relationships and i keep an open mind about them, reflecting on what i value in people and what to avoid. And can safely say that as i go through life, my companionships/relationships/friendships are always getting better. Life is always a roller-coaster ride, but you can choose your perspective in any situation or experience. If you choose to learn and grow, then you'll never be a loser, and you'll always discover something new about yourself. I can say from experience that the better you know yourself, the easier it is to find joy in your life. I'm 34, and the experiences I've had are all learning experiences, and some are even joyous.
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Posted: Sat Jan 01, 2011 11:21 am
There's one thing to remember in all of this:
If he would do something like that, you don't want him. I know it hurts right now, but it WILL get better. Give it time, and focus on yourself; what makes you happy, any activities you like, anything you'd like to learn. If he can't appreciate who you are, then he doesn't deserve you.
As someone whose gone through quite a bit of heartbreak, I know that it feels like you'll never find someone else, but you will, and they'll be better than anyone you could have hoped for. Just give it time.
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Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2011 10:38 am
*shakes head*
Man... every guy I've ever dated has made me feel just like this. It's a d**k act and pisses me off.
I have yet to meet a guy that has proven me wrong.
Yet I still find myself attracted to them.
Bah.
You'll pull through if you can convince yourself of this one truth.
"You are better than him and too good for him"
Because no one that truly loves you would ever be able to live with themselves if they knew their actions made you feel this bad.
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