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| Have you come out yet? |
| Yes, and I'm proud! |
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37% |
[ 11 ] |
| No, but I want to |
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34% |
[ 10 ] |
| No, and I don't think I ever will |
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17% |
[ 5 ] |
| Yes, but I wish I hadn't |
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10% |
[ 3 ] |
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| Total Votes : 29 |
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 Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2010 1:28 pm
I've known to myself for some time now that I'm bi (a few years), but I've only ever come out to one person in real life (as opposed to everyone on Gaia, whom I've never met). I've never come out to my parents or my best friends, or anyone like that. Recently, I've felt more of an urge to be with other women, and I feel like part of that equates with wanting to let others know my orientation. I'm just curious what you all think about it. When and for what reasons should someone come out?
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2010 1:31 pm
You should come out when you're ready, and only when you feel you need to do it to be yourself. I came out because I was tired of hiding who I was and not being able to bring a guy home to my parents.
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Bang Bang Kitty Lincon Crew
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Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2010 2:44 am
I should wait untill your 100% happy for everyone to know. Friends tend to be the easiest, as at the end of the day friends come and go but the best ones stay, so something as minor as this should not impact on true friends. Family on the other hand could be a bit trickier. But at the end of the day unless your going to be bringing someone home *I* don't see any real need to disscuss it with them (but then I realised my sexuality really after I had moved out)
So at the end of the day only you know when you are ready!
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Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2010 5:41 am
I think it really depends on the person and the situation. I was living on my own, was open with myself about it, and decided that people could love more or leave me and that it wouldn't affect me.
I was also in a large city with a large gay population, so I wouldn't have been alienated by my community.
There are benefits to being out, but in some areas the benefits of being quiet still outweigh coming out. It's sad, but true.
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Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2010 12:41 pm
TypeFace I should wait untill your 100% happy for everyone to know. Friends tend to be the easiest, as at the end of the day friends come and go but the best ones stay, so something as minor as this should not impact on true friends. Family on the other hand could be a bit trickier. But at the end of the day unless your going to be bringing someone home *I* don't see any real need to disscuss it with them (but then I realised my sexuality really after I had moved out) So at the end of the day only you know when you are ready!
I don't think telling my family will be a problem/the situation won't likely come up because my parents are divorced and both of them have moved to new houses since I've come to college. The only reason it's been bugging me recently is because there's a girl I secretly had a crush on, and I found out a few days ago that she's dating another girl, and I cried for a good two hours upon learning that, and I'm not quite sure why, but it's really been distressing me and I don't know how to handle it without talking to people.
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Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2010 2:05 pm
Ariadne VI TypeFace I should wait untill your 100% happy for everyone to know. Friends tend to be the easiest, as at the end of the day friends come and go but the best ones stay, so something as minor as this should not impact on true friends. Family on the other hand could be a bit trickier. But at the end of the day unless your going to be bringing someone home *I* don't see any real need to disscuss it with them (but then I realised my sexuality really after I had moved out) So at the end of the day only you know when you are ready!
I don't think telling my family will be a problem/the situation won't likely come up because my parents are divorced and both of them have moved to new houses since I've come to college. The only reason it's been bugging me recently is because there's a girl I secretly had a crush on, and I found out a few days ago that she's dating another girl, and I cried for a good two hours upon learning that, and I'm not quite sure why, but it's really been distressing me and I don't know how to handle it without talking to people.I read this forum and I can understand exactly what you're talking about, I've told one person in real life about my sexuality (he also happens to be my crush), though have told most of my friends who I've met over the internet, and when you said you cried after finding out she is dating someone, I've been through that same thing this past week, but yeah, I don't feel comfortable talking about it with anyone so just deal with it by crying to myself I guess.. I know this doesn't help with your problem but I thought it might help knowing you're not the only person going through this x
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Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2010 2:34 pm
SuperBowser_Bros64 Ariadne VI TypeFace I should wait untill your 100% happy for everyone to know. Friends tend to be the easiest, as at the end of the day friends come and go but the best ones stay, so something as minor as this should not impact on true friends. Family on the other hand could be a bit trickier. But at the end of the day unless your going to be bringing someone home *I* don't see any real need to disscuss it with them (but then I realised my sexuality really after I had moved out) So at the end of the day only you know when you are ready!
I don't think telling my family will be a problem/the situation won't likely come up because my parents are divorced and both of them have moved to new houses since I've come to college. The only reason it's been bugging me recently is because there's a girl I secretly had a crush on, and I found out a few days ago that she's dating another girl, and I cried for a good two hours upon learning that, and I'm not quite sure why, but it's really been distressing me and I don't know how to handle it without talking to people.I read this forum and I can understand exactly what you're talking about, I've told one person in real life about my sexuality (he also happens to be my crush), though have told most of my friends who I've met over the internet, and when you said you cried after finding out she is dating someone, I've been through that same thing this past week, but yeah, I don't feel comfortable talking about it with anyone so just deal with it by crying to myself I guess.. I know this doesn't help with your problem but I thought it might help knowing you're not the only person going through this x
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Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2010 2:44 pm
*huggles Ariadne VI and SuperBowser* You two make me want to hug you to help you feel better...I wish I could do so much more to help you two out.
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Posted: Thu Jan 13, 2011 6:49 pm
I'm kinda in the same boat as you guys (well, not about the person i have a crush on as I'm kinda alienated from females my age right this second as I'm on an internship about an hour from my college and work in a computer related industry, yeah no girls T.T). Anyways, the only person I've actually officially told is my boyfriend, but we've been dating forever and he has dated my bi girls and actually guess it before I even knew XP I'm not sure what to do about my parents as they are both highly religious in that really conservative way, but I'm not sure I even really need to tell them as I don't live at home anymore. *Grabs everyone* I know things can be hard sometimes, but you know, not all relationships last forever, and now you know your crush would be okay with and maybe even welcome your sexual orientation. I'd wait it out, it may hurt in the meantime, but you can still be friends and get to know them better until they're single again. Make sure you take it SLOW, if you try that as they will have just broke up and may be really hurt inside.
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Posted: Wed Feb 02, 2011 5:05 pm
I've never come out. Never seen the need. Even when I've had girlfriends.
I believe that for each person, whether or not to come out is dictated by the people around them and their possible attitudes towards bisexuality (or homosexuality)
If you date a woman and become serious, it's probably a good idea to come out, I can't imagine anyone wanting to be someone's 'little secret' as a serious relationship.
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Posted: Thu Feb 03, 2011 8:27 pm
"coming out" does not seem like a real thing to me. I don't think it's a big deal and thus I don't make a big deal about it to my parents xd
LOL, haven't told them, but why should I? biggrin
I just sort of go with it...
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Posted: Wed Apr 06, 2011 11:05 pm
I haven't come out to my parents yet, just my friends and sister.I think my mom would be okay with it but I'm a bit paranoid of my dad's reaction.
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Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2011 8:18 pm
i, like most of the people on here, just don't know how to come out to my family, it is the hardest part and if any one could help that would be awesome, thanks smile
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Posted: Fri Apr 08, 2011 4:26 pm
Shilberu Erikku I haven't come out to my parents yet, just my friends and sister.I think my mom would be okay with it but I'm a bit paranoid of my dad's reaction. thats pretty much the same story with me, just i dont have a sister, but i dont think my brothers would accept it either D:
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Posted: Mon Apr 11, 2011 1:33 am
Both my parents are fairly cool with this sort of thing (I knew my Mum wouldn't believe me without proof but would accept after that and that my Dad wouldn't care.) So my plan of "coming out" was casually mentioning it in passing (so casually that I had to tell my Dad twice and that I had to hold on for dear life as my Mum nearly crashed the car!).
For a long while though I was hiding it from everyone I knew. I had my first relationship when I was young (it was innocent though) and that was with a girl (when I was ten/eleven) and then my first real crush was a girl (twelve onwards) and for a long while I thought I was a lesbian and I started telling my friends that I had a crush on any guy that popped into my head.
It was at this time (tweleve/thirteen) that I got depressed (I was bullied, one of three friends who knew I was bi died) but I didn't talk to anyone about it because I felt alienated by sexuality, that I couldn't trust them. Of course I was wrong, so wrong, but at the time I felt that way.
My point is that you need to decide these things based on you; about how you feel about yourself, your sexuality and most importantly about how much you rely on support.
(Just so you know...) My life is, well not epic, but my friends are epic. I'm currently "out" both to my friend and family but to my school in general. Unlike my fears I have not been treated any differently by my friends, I still sleep in their beds at sleepovers and continue to be as close as sisters with my best friend. My family love me and if my Mum would stop hinting that she doesn't believe I'm bi I would have a 0 accepted life. So everything is peaches and gravy biggrin
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