Welcome to Gaia! ::

I figured that since I myself am a fairly new mother and I'm sure there are other witchy/pagany parents out there, it would be nice to have a thread dedicated to discussions on parenting, pagan parenting, and all things associated!

Depending on how big this thread gets, I may at some point post a topic of the week sort of thing, but for right now I decided to keep it general and just see where the topic takes us!

For starters, I suppose I should give some ice-breaker questions to answer, so here we go! Feel free to answer as many as you'd like but don't feel limited to the questions if there is another topic you'd like to discuss or even ask a question for others of your own!

question If you have any children, how many? or are you expecting?
question What was your pregnancy like/ how was it for you watching your partner go through pregnancy?
question How old are they?
question How do you plan to raise them religious/spiritual wise?
question How is your parenting experience going so far?
exclaim Anything else you'd like to share or ask of others experiences!

Not a parent? Not a problem! Feel free to join in the conversations anyway and give us your opinion or hypothetical/future parenting ideas.

I myself, have one daughter. She's about 10 months old now. We weren't really trying to have a baby, but we obviously, weren't trying to hard not to lol

She was born five weeks early partly due to the fact that I came down with toxemia, and also because it is typical for babies that have a single-artery umbilical cord as she did. She spent a little time in the infant intensive care unit, but came home after about two weeks is doing wonderful growth and development wise, she's just a tad on the smaller side but is growing steadily. I think she was just anxious to get out into the world.

Personally, I HATED being pregnant. I always thought that I would be a wonderful pregnant woman, glowing and almost serene at all times to create a calm soothing developing atmosphere for the little one, but was scared to death of whether I'd actually be a good mother once I had her. This proved to be very much the opposite.

For one, I just hated all the attention and random strangers asking me when I'm due, what I'm having, yadda yadda, and can I touch your stomach? I'm a friendly person, but fairly private about personal matters and it just drove me nuts. That and how vulnerable it made me the further I got along. I've always been fairly independent and it really dampened my spirit to have some of that taken away, like having to ask others to lift things for me, or pick something up for me because it was hard to bend over, and at the time I worked at a Payday Loan company. It wasn't in a terrible neighbor hood but one indecent in particular left me feeling very helpless and uneasy. (Had to call the police because two men came in when I was running the store by myself and were acting very nervous and even tried to come behind the counter to use our restroom which we have sign posted that says, 'no public restrooms')

Second, my emotions went absolutely haywire! And I knew it but there was nothing I could really do about it. I felt like I was going crazy and my mind was broken. I definitely had postpartum depression after I had her, but I think I had it before I had her too! Dread and sadness would just wash over me at random times and I had a hard time dealing with the physical changes. I’d always been about the same weight ever since I was about 17 and I gained so much weight (which I now understand was from puffing up like a toad from the toxemia) but it wasn’t just how I looked, I FELT disgusting. The whole experience was just overwhelming and I really do think it’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever went through. Worth it, but trying. The transition from maiden to mother is just such I think.

For the most part, I’m dealing with the depression and over the last month have really pulled myself up and out.

As far as how I intend to raise her spiritual wise, I plan on being very open. When she starts asking all of those fun questions I’ll present her with ‘Well, here is what mommy believes, and daddy believes this and some people think this’ and encourage her to simply ask herself what she thinks, what makes sense to her. I don’t want to force anything on her but I will stress the importance of at least feeling everything out once to gain perspectives as well as provide information on all spiritual aspects from many different cultures and belief systems.

On a whole I’d say my parenting experience so far has been what I suspect is fairly natural; exhausting but exhilarating, demanding but rewarding, and it really makes a person examine themselves calling forth lessons learned, childhood memories forgotten and under appreciated, and it’s quite a new beginning. Sometimes honestly I am sad by this as there is still a small part of me that wishes to cling onto my maiden form and freedoms, but it’s well worth it to now have the heart of a mother, and joys that come with it.

Absolutely CelticFaith, I even edited the post so those who don't have wee little heathens running around yet don't feel left out!

If you don't mind I have a few questions.

If you were to adopt,

Have you thought much on what kind of child you'd like to adopt? Such as is there a certain age group or gender? Or do you think for you it'd be more along the lines of, 'lets get introduced to a variety of different children and see if anything just clicks with any of them'

If you were to have a surrogate,

Would you have any certifications other than obviously a woman who is healthy during the pregnancy, that would make her more qualified in your eyes?

Wanting a healthy child doesn't make you a bigot. Your not saying you wouldn't love a child with disabilities, just that if there is a way to prevent them from having one, why not take advantage of that for the best outcome. Nothing discriminating about that. Every parents wants to give their child the best advantage even from the get go. 3nodding

I have one little guy who is 13 months old. ^_^ I had a really quite pregnancy....sept for the HUGE mood swings...lol. My husband and I knew from the first ultrasound that we were going to have a boy. He just felt male. We don't really know how we are going to raise him spiritualy yet, sept for the fact that we will try to answer his questions the best way we know how. You see, I am an eclectic Kitchen Witch, and my husband is generic pagan. Sometimes we have very differnt aproches and views on sperituality.

I too whent through Postpardom. Its difficult to get yourself back to your happy place and I'm glad your finaly getting there.

there is so much to discuse about pagan parenting it might be better to make a subform for it.

That's always a possibility in the future, I kind of just wanted to see how busy this thread is first. If it's get big enough that it's difficult for everyone to hold conversations with out getting lost then we can definitely think about making a larger designated space.

Ugh, Tell me about it. What was irritating for me is I was aware of it when it was happening and that it was just my hormones going crazy but there was nothing really I could do about it. I felt like I was losing my mind. I would just tell my husband, " I love you, and I'm gong to apologize upfront because I honestly cannot make up my mind if I want punch everyone who looks at me in the face, or just here sit and cry about nothing really"

Then I would get upset about being upset because I didn't want that kind of negativity for the baby all the time, but a very dear friend of mine pointed something out that was the most logical thing I've ever heard towards such things. She explained that, while I was pregnant, the baby isn't just getting it's nourishment alone from me, it's developing on all levels. Crying, being angry, and such things are all a part of life and if she never feels that inside me how is she supposed to know what those things are and that they are perfectly natural emotions to have when need be, once she's been born. That really helped me feel better about it.




Well it does sound like he'll be well rounded though 3nodding



It is, and thank you. May I ask how long yours lasted if it's not to personal a question to ask?