Listen, I'm just gunna tell you what you need to know to not die, then I'm gone. Is that clear?

Good.

First things first, Nuclear Winter. This proposes a few problems.

Number 1: It's dark. Not so dark you can't see nothing, but dark enough if you don't keep your wits about you you're as good as dead.

Number 2: The Ash. Basically, everything that was before fire rained from the sky. It's all up there. People. animals, plants. Hell, cars and buildings too. All of it in nasty little black flakes. This s**t will kill you in the worst ways. Folks round here calls it Black Lung. Drys you from the inside out and that's just where the trouble starts. I ain't no doctor, so I can;t tell you exactly how it kills ya. I can tell you I've seen it at work, more than my far share. It's not how you want to go, trust me. Make sure to keep this s**t out of you. There are plenty of ways, gas masks, googles, all sorts of stuff. I've seen some pretty creative stuff in my time.

Number 3: Fungus. Lots of it. Basically all there is, plant-wise. Big stuff too. Most of it looks like mushrooms or some variant. You'll want to know what you can and cannot eat. Wouldn't want you turning into. . . One of "them". Just steer clear of anything red and anything what smells like sulfur and you should be fine.

Next, you'll want to know what is and is not out there. Most of the wildlife wants nothing to do with you and it'll clear out before you get within eyesight. However, some of it means to to kill and eat you. The main things to look out for:

El Waitofukinbigo: You'll see these ugly bastards from quite a ways off. In fact, you will always see at least one on the horizon here or there. They're huge and they love to pick their teeth with your tiny human bones. Steer clear.

The Spawn: Some says these one used to be human. They look human enough. . . I mean, arms, legs and a two foot stance, but thats where the similarities end. Their skin is grey, their teeth are long and their only out for one thing and that's to rip you to bite sized pieces. Plus, they love traveling together. Best keep an eye open.

That's about everything. Be seeing ya.