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So tonight was my formal all girls tea party! Fun right... no.
I invited Carnemire a girl named Kim and my ex girlfriend Tanya. Now me and Tanya haven't spoken for a while and we were trying to rekindle our friendship but that will never happen. Tanya somehow believes she has multiple personalities; a real disorder but in her case a blatant lie. I know this because all of her personalities know each other, talk to each other and are gay together! Plus she thinks she is a vampire! I have met some people who think they are vampires for good reasons. She is not one of them (unless you coult the sparkly kind. she is so one of those) all in all she is just an attention whore who cant seem to mature past the age of 13...
Tanya walked in wearing a tux (fine whatever) and then immediately sat down and started telling raunchy dirty jokes. NOT OK! Then talking about butt sex and how she likes to drink blood and knows how all the different blood types taste (aren't there serial killers like that?) it was just gross and she wouldn't stop. Finally she started jumping on and humping (literally) my friend Kim who she dosn't even know. This results in her breaking one of the tea cups, witch just happened to be a very special gift handed down by Carnemires grandmother. plus this dosn't even deter her from continuing to jump on Kim!
Finally i decide to get her away from breakables with a trip to dennys. things calm down a bit (with the exception of her still jumping on Kim) and we all just talk. Tanya still insisted on being obnoxious and finally i was getting frustrated and decided to call it a night. As i am walking out the door to Dennys, Tanya leans over to me and says "your friend (Carnemire) is a real B**ch"
NO KIDDING! calls my best friend the B word! WTF???
I hold my tounge until we get home and then ask her to meet me outside where i am having a chill out smoke. When she comes out I say' "I don't know who you think you are but you cannot call my friend that and you need to apologize." She refuses and I tell her "this is not a request, it is a demand. if you don't say sorry you are not allowed on my property ever again"
This is when she starts up with "I'm not apologizing for something my other personality said but he wouldn't apologize anyway. She should be the one to say sorry."
Wait what? She has been nothing but nice (a rare thing for her sometimes, this included) and what you said isn't cool.
She then slaps me across the face. No kidding. and I immediately grab her by the hair and pull my fist up to punch her. However, I stopped myself (mistake!) and just tell her to get off my property. She left calling me a whore on the way and Wolfe (my boyfriend) and Carnemire both rush out cuz they heard her slap me.
The worst part is knowing that this still isn't over. In a few days she is going to TXT me and ask to hang out and say it was all her other personalities fault. I'm not buying it.
This is a good reason to punch someone in the face.

Yeah, Wolfe and I were talking about what we would have done if we hadn't been downstairs when she slapped Kat... Oh man, we were both so mad its not even funny.

The really hilarious part is that I often get called the B word, and I don't really mind it-- but I had been so tortuously polite to this girl, even after she was acting like a rude, spoiled brat the whole party. I barely said one word to her, even when she broke my dead grandmother's china tea cup, or when she smashed a jar that Kat's friend had brought her from Japan...

She wouldn't get off of Kim, who is married, and it just felt so inappropriate the whole time, but I didn't say anything. Wolfe shows up and starts teasing her for "having a crush" because Tanya kept rubbing her face on Kim's cheek; she was practically glued to her. Like, she was a freaking monkey-- she would not get off this poor girl the whole time.

Anyway, so Kim and Kat step outside, and I'm minding my own business, writing, and Wolfe starts teasing her. Very loudly and defiantly, she says, "No, if I had a crush on her, I would have kissed her by now."

Wolfe replies, "...She's married. You know that, right?"

And Tanya just says, "So? Why should I care? Like that matters!"

I had just totally had it with this girl's behavior at this point, so I look up at her and say, "You know what? Maybe it matters to her. Maybe that's why she got married to the guy," and I returned to my writing. Normally, to me, people's business, their infidelities or whatever the hell they want to do with their lives are not my concern... But the fact that Tanya knew that Kim had made a commitment to this man, and she still thought that she had every right to just completely disregard this if she felt like it infuriated me. Her behavior was just so selfish and disgusting-- and I just wanted her to shut her stupid little mouth.

Its not like I said anything particularly rude. I even kept my mouth shut when she basically told me that I was weak for needing medication for my panic disorder. She told me that I should just "sit it out" because she has schizophrenic attacks and she just deals with them. She assumed so many things about me, continually invaded my personal space, made utterly vulgar remarks the entire night, talked over other people's conversations, pretended to forget my name on several occasions (its LIZ. Like, the easiest name to remember ever-- and she would just interrupt whatever I was doing to say loudly, "So, who are you again?"), constantly intruded on my personal business, and just generally acted like a complete a**.

And I kept to myself, even when she started gabbing about the different blood types she prefers to drink, which flavor is the best (what the ********?!) and how she was a reincarnated French vampire, and she knew how to speak French from her past life. It was Kat's party, and I tried SO HARD to be polite to this girl because it was a formal event, I was at somebody else's house, and I wanted to be respectful!

So I say one thing to her and she decides I'm a horrible person. The only thing that I regret is that I WASN'T a b***h to her, because I swear to God, I would have torn that little twit in half and spit on the pieces. When I HEARD her slap Kat from all the way downstairs, Wolfe and I ran up, and I was ready to beat the crap out of her, but she was already running down the street, literally screaming obscenities at Kat, calling her horrible names...

I honestly have never met such a immature and selfish person in my whole life, and I really, really apologize to Kat for anything that I had to do with the way this turned out. I know that I AM called a b***h a lot, and often people feel that I deserve it, but I feel that in this case, it hardly merited her reaction to Kat's request for an apology. I didn't want one; I didn't even know she'd called me this until after the whole thing was over, but Kat deserved an apology.


Quite frankly, Kitten, I have never felt so honored in life that you felt so driven to protect my good name, and I love you more than anything. You are the sweetest, kindest girl I know, and you didn't deserve a single thing that happened, and I'm so, so sorry, even just that my personality pricked this girl the wrong way, and that she took it out on you and your beautiful party.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!

I was about to call after her... and tell her that if she ever called you a whore again I was going to rip her hair out of her ******** head. I figured she was already going, though, and it wasn't worth the freaking drama of screaming down the block. Having her screaming at you like that in front of the neighbors was bad enough as it was!!!

kaku i could barely read that but, it looks and seems interesting of what it's about.

Like a year ago this really annoying girl wouldn't leave me alone. She was smelly and stupid and very fat. She once wore the same shirt for like a week! I hated her before she even sat down and talked to me. Then she started talking crap about one of my best friends. It turns out she didn't even know my friend and was just repeating what someone else said about her because she found out that I knew her. But she was talking like she hung out with her all the time. I tried several times to imply that I didn't want to talk to her. Once when she sat down at my table I pointed to the cafeteria and said "Look, your friends are inside." She didn't get the point. I wanted to punch her in the neck.

I remember when you told me about that!! Jenn actually has a lot of crazy stories like that... Mine mostly revolve around Sandi.

Ewwwww she totally was trying to give you AIDS.