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 Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 7:47 pm
 Axel shifted a bit from one foot to the other, feeling just a bit uncomfortable. Again, there was that feeling that doing what he was doing was betraying Riku, but…what else was he supposed to do? He didn’t want to hurt Riku anymore than he already had-and he knew he had, with all the screw-ups he’d made-but he also just couldn’t…
“Sometimes I just don’t know…” he said quietly, looking down, away, “I just…need someone to be there, or else everything I am is going to break apart. I need you but I…know I can’t keep waiting for you to be around anymore, it’s not fair, you know, all things considered.” But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t jump on every chance he got to see Ri, no, not at all. He would still treasure every one of those moments. “I just think…he might be the one to keep me from breaking up…”
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 8:38 pm
 He nodded in understanding, letting out a sigh. Riku let his arms rest at his sides for the moment, looking directly at Axel. "I know it isn't fair..." Oh he did. He wanted to be alive again so badly, but knew it would never happen. He wanted to be with Axel, but knew the only way besides him miraculously coming back to life was Axel dying, and he didn't want that.
That was when his knees started to buckle just slightly. It was just a warning, but Shy was beginning, slowly but surely, to regain consciousness. Ah joys. Marvelous marvelous joys. It wasn't like the first time, no, not at all. It was a nice little warning, but that was it.
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Ventus-Knight of the Wind
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 9:43 pm
He glanced down to the floor for a moment, trying, trying, to hold his composure together this time-he would not break, he would not even bend. But oh, he wanted to. He just wanted to cling to Riku and never let go, and hope the power of his embrace would be enough to prevent the possession from ending. He wouldn’t do any of that though.
He did, however, take a step forward, closer, when he noticed the wobble. Again, fear, panic, seized him, but he didn’t allow it to show. His mouth felt dry and he swallowed hard, managing a small, sad smile. “I love you, Ri,” he said.
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 10:19 pm
Riku smiled softly "I love you too, Ax. That'll never change." He said, shooting a glance to Spike who had decided to simply take the chance to walk off and leave the two alone for a bit. Well, looked like he'd either have to go soon on his own, or crash into something.
He looked back to Axel, still feeling the very beginning of Shy beginning to regain consciousness. It wasn't all too much, but enough to cause him to be slightly light headed "Don't know how much more time I have... But I think willingly leaving the psycho would be best for me." He shrugged a bit as he said this.
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Ventus-Knight of the Wind
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Posted: Wed Mar 17, 2010 9:28 pm
The redhead swallowed hard again, fighting against the lump in his throat, and even though he felt tears sting his eyes, he refused to show them and smiled softly. “Alright,” he said, praying that his voice didn’t crack, that it didn’t reflect any of his pain, and raised out a barely trembling hand to brush a lock of hair behind Riku’s ear, “Not like…not like we won’t see each other again.”
It was hard, so hard, and his pulse was still racing-much faster than a vampire’s should be-and panic still held him tight-much more than was logical. It was almost like losing Riku all over again, but it wasn’t, and he knew it wasn’t, knew he’d be able to see him again, but it didn’t make it hurt any less. Nothing could make it hurt less. All he could do was be strong and deal with it, and maybe one day, some day, the pain would get better.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 7:09 pm
Riku nodded faintly in agreement "Exactly..." He stated quietly, raising one hand to run it through Axel's hair gently before feeling another small buckle of his knees, moving to rest his hands on the redheads shoulders. He looked to him, smile still faint before speaking again "See ya soon..." With that, he shuddered, those golden eyes slipping shut as Shyama's form fell limp.
Shyama, whether caught or allowed to crash to the floor, slowly opened his eyes, blinking just slightly. He lifted his eyes, blinking, curious as to what had happened exactly. He looked to Ax, as if the question reflected in his eyes, which perhaps it did, and asked anyway. Head tilting just slightly to the side, golden eyes blinking curiously in that insane, with the slightest hint of innocence - no matter how false - look he had so mastered.
"What'd I miss...?"
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Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2010 5:39 pm
A thousand lies have made me colder, and I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face He caught Shyama when he started to fall, holding him up, probably closer than he had to, in an almost protective way. The redhead’s heart felt like it was breaking all over again, and he struggled to fight back the overwhelming emotions, determined to choke back the tears and force a small smile-he would never show how he really felt, at least not yet.
It was strange though…at the same time that he felt weak and broken inside, there was a flicker of warmth in his chest simply at being in Shyama’s company. He would have to admit the truth sooner or later, when he felt brave enough, because there was no way he could keep it to himself forever. Hell, he wasn’t even sure he could manage a few more days of keeping it to himself.
He took a breath at Shyama’s question, shaking his head a little. “Nothing,” he said, “You didn’t miss anything. Not anything important, anyway.” Really, he just didn’t want to talk about what had happened. He wasn’t yet to the stage where talking about Riku wouldn’t break him down inside. Eventually he would get there, somehow, but it wasn’t something he could accomplish right now. I'm here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby, and I dream about you all the time[Missing side pic because the glitch pissed me off too much ~~]
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Posted: Sun Sep 26, 2010 11:42 pm
He blinked a bit as he looked to Axel, not knowing if he should ask if that were true or not but decided on simply nodding for now and taking that as the answer. Hopefully he'd be able to learn more soon enough. Before he did something stupid that would potentially lead to Axel killing him.
However, he couldn't help himself after a moment, thinking he had figured out a bit of what had happened. "Was it somethin' to do with him?" He tilted his head to the side, looking to Axel, curious, golden eyes blinking and showing that child-like curiosity he could pull off so well.
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2010 11:22 pm
A thousand lies have made me colder, and I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face The question made him look away, and Axel took a step back, struggling to keep his emotions reigned in. He didn’t want to lie to Shyama, but he didn’t want to tell the truth either. He was afraid that the truth would lead to more questions or discussion, but that was equally possible with a lie too. He didn’t want to deceive Shyama either, and silently the redhead cursed himself for being soft-too soft to lie.
“Yeah. Yeah it was,” Axel said quietly, nodding. “He was…I, uh…I was talking to him.” Admitting the truth caused a lump to form in his throat, and he tightened his hands into fists, determined to keep his composure. He couldn’t cry in front of Shyama-he barely knew him for god’s sake-and yet…he felt safe in some way. Some way he wouldn’t be able to put into words and he wasn’t even going to try to.
One thing at a time. Get past the subject of Riku without having a breakdown, and then maybe, maybe, he could voice the other things he had going through his mind. If the thought of speaking those things didn’t make him feel like hyperventilating, that was.I'm here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby, and I dream about you all the time
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Posted: Wed Sep 29, 2010 7:08 am
He blinked, standing on his own and shifting back and forth on his feet just slightly. He didn't understand what exactly he was feeling. He didn't understand it at all because it was new to him. He felt as though he'd said the wrong thing and upset the red head.
When he heard the response, however, he nodded and tilted his head to the side, eyes asking 'really' though not knowing if it was best to actually voice. Some odd little voice in his head had told him to keep quiet for the moment.
He shifted on his feet again, still feeling as though he'd said the wrong thing, that he had truly upset the taller. Guilt? Was that what he was feeling? What was guilt, exactly, though? It was confusing to him. Far too confusing for him to understand.
He wanted to know more about Riku, to ask questions, to learn more. He tilted his head to the side as he looked at Ax, wanting to ask, not knowing exactly how to word it. However, shortly before he even thought he'd had a decent wording for the questions on his mind, there was a twisted feeling in his stomach, a small growl from it as well.
The noise and feeling somewhat surprised him, food having been one of the farthest things from his mind. After the look of slight surprise passed, Shyama blinking just a bit, he giggled "I'm kinda hungry," he commented, giggling a bit more, a bright, child-like smile across his face.
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Posted: Wed Sep 29, 2010 4:00 pm
A thousand lies have made me colder, and I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face Taking a deep breath to calm himself, Axel arched a brow at Shyama’s comment. At first he could just blink, letting this sink in. He couldn’t even pass it off as a simple subject change to save him from a breakdown, because he could hear the boy’s stomach growling. Still, it was a subject change, and however baffling it was, he was going to seize the chance to talk about something else.
“How…how can you be hungry?” he asked, straightening and reigning all of his emotions back under control again, “You just ate.”I'm here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby, and I dream about you all the time
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Posted: Wed Sep 29, 2010 4:30 pm
Shyama shrugged and blinked a bit himself, looking to Axel "I'unno. Spike said I was like a bottomless pit or somethin' before." He nodded a bit and giggled. The boy wasn't sure if that was even the real reason, it could have been something else, but all he knew was he was hungry and his stomach was now demanding food.
"D'you have any peanut butter 'n jelly?" He asked, looking to Axel still and blinking again.
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Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2010 8:53 pm
A thousand lies have made me colder, and I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face Shaking his head a bit, the crusnik allowed himself to relax, running a hand back through his hair. This was a good subject change, and he was going to go with it. He was going to do his best right now to pretend what had happened just earlier well, hadn’t happened. He’d let his mind wander over it some other time, when he was alone, when there was no one around to see him break down if it came to that.
“Peanut butter and jelly,” he repeated aloud to himself, “Yeah, I think I should have that somewhere around here.” He turned, heading over to the cabinet, and began to look through the shelves. “I assume you want some bread, too?” he asked, looking back over his shoulder as he pulled the jar of peanut butter off of the shelf and set it down on the counter before heading over to the refrigerator to find the jelly.I'm here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby, and I dream about you all the time
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Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2010 10:01 pm
 Shyama giggled and smiled at Axel as he nodded. He would definitely need bread, that was true. "Thank you~" He said, a bright smile across his face. He was so easily made happy. So easily entertained, as well. There was something on his mind, something he may not have fully understood at all as to what it meant.
"I like you." He said with a nod. Of course, he was speaking more along the lines of as a person - or vampire, whichever Axel would rather - he liked him. Nothing more. Well at least that was what he thought. "Y'make me feel kinda warm and fuzzy inside" There was a bit more nodding as he said this.
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Posted: Fri Oct 01, 2010 6:46 pm
A thousand lies have made me colder, and I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face “You’re welcome,” Axel replied automatically as he pulled the jelly out and set it down on the counter. Next came the bread, and it was as he was remembering a plate would be needed too that he heard Shyama’s other comment. He hesitated halfway to the cabinet where the plates were, his hands slowly lowering back to his sides as he turned the words over and over in his head.
“Huh.” Was all he said as he blinked, remaining calm in appearance even as his pulse quickened. Oh hell. He was never going to be able to last on not speaking his mind. Days were out of the question, hours probably were too. Maybe he was going about this too fast, maybe he should’ve stepped back to take a look at this whole thing, but that would be thinking rationally.
Axel hadn’t been thinking rationally for a long time now.
Stepping over to where Shyama was, Axel cupped the boy’s face in his hands. He hesitated for the briefest of moments, and then Axel leaned in to kiss him softly on the lips. Rational thought was out the window, every second was precious because once it was gone, it was gone. He’d learned that the hard way.I'm here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby, and I dream about you all the time
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