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Jouryoku Dann

PostPosted: Fri Nov 27, 2009 1:41 pm


. . : : R a i k a g e n V e g a : : . .


Raikagen Vega

Age
22

Height
5'11"

Weight
159 lbs

Eye Color
Blue

Hair Color
White

Village
Getsugakure

Clan
Raikagen

Village Rank
Jounin

Other Titles
None thus far

Appearance Description
Vega is a fairly tall, well shaped shinobi, quite the opposite of bulky in build but still extremely muscular. He has mid length white hair with peircing blue eyes and fairly pale skin. his eyes are quite cold and , along with his generally straight face, quite emotionless.

Personality
Very smart, quick witted both in and out of combat, portraying his quick wits in an often sarcastic or cynical way. As charismatic and articulate he is, he is still quite cold, aloof and introverted, tending to keep to himself having little regard for his fellow shinobi.

History
Vega was born in the Getsugakure, the first and only son of a rather rich family who had immigrated there from the Kumogakure. From a very young age Vega had a quite aloof personality, generally keeping to himself as a child. From a very young age He showed great initiative and determination, training almost excessively in both body and mind. His ninjutsu came almost naturally, realizing his electrical chakra nature just a year into the academy.
This was when his jutsu development began. Despite his obvious nac for ninjutsu Vega was hardly interested in it, his obsession was much more in the human body, in the perfect design and operation of the human body, the destructive capabilities of the human body, and the reactions exhibited by and possible manipulations of the human body.
A particular reaction being the reactions of ones muscles to electricity. Vegas natural born ability to manipulate his electrical natured chakra lead to the creation of his signature ability, the 'Haidyo' or 'Lightning movement' technique. By his almost religious use of this technique Vega turned it into an almost passive ability aswell as honing his ninjutsu and taijutsu.
After graduating from the Academy at a very young age Vega began his work on creating a weapon, a weapon that would perfectly compliment his primarily taijutsu fighting style. Over three years and and excessive amount of trial and error the no longer so young genin had created a weapon that he was content with.
Over the years Vega picked up, just like many of his hobbies, metal working quite quickly. After these three years of hard work (outside of his still very consistent body building and book learning) Vega had developed a weapon that suited his needs. Crafted of very strong metal as well as chakra absorbing metals Vega made a strong claw, the perfect extension of his own fist. The glove was crafted of dozens of small metal pieces that interlocked intricately, wrapping around his hand and wrist. All of his fingers were extended an extra four inches by the blades that ran down his fingers, his thumb having only a two and a half inch blade.
This weapon allowed Vega to begin training with his weapon without drastically changing his fighting style. Over the years he continued his training, always adapting and improving his techniques and weapons hoping to one day perfect his weapons, his jutsu's, and ultimately himself.



_________________________________



Primary Element
Lightning

Secondary Element
unknown




_________________________________




Jutsu and Skills

Stats
Ninjutsu: 4/7
Genjutsu: 3/7
Taijutsu: 6/7

Total Jutsu Learned/Learnable
Genin Justu-7/13:: Chuunin Jutsu-4/7:: Jounin Jutsu-2/3:: Kage Justsu-0/1::

Ninjutsu

Haidyo
Level: Genin
Type: Ninjutsu
Vega's first ninjutsu technique ever created. This ability increases the speed and magnitude of the electrical impulses created by the users brain. This allows the user to move quicker with much quicker reaction time then they would otherwise. This technique is a passive ninjutsu, requiring no hand seals to use, however, the technique must 'build up' in the sense that when first starting to use the technique in a battle it will be far less effective then when a user has been using it in a battle for quite some time.


Rai Bunshin no jutsu(Lightning Clone Technique)
Level: Genin
Type: Ninjutsu
After using the proper hand seal a jolt of electrical chakra jumps off the user, creating an lightning clone. The electricity remains in the clone until it is destroyed, which is when the lightning chakra dissipated. If the clone is destroyed by the user how ever the user can absorb this lightning chakra.

Raiton-Raikou Kujiku sad Lightning Crush)
Level: Genin
Type: Ninjutsu
A very basic technique. The user does the required hand symbols then takes a brief moment to focus' the technique into the part of the body where its to be used (generally either hand or foot). This technique significantly increases the destructive power of physical attacks made by the part of the body which the technique is being used, hitting what ever the target with a strong jolt of electricity. Once a user becomes more a custom to the technique they can form it on multiple parts of the body at once, being able to maintain the technique longer with experience as well.



Raiton- Bodi Fuzi Fuin No-Jutsu(Body paralysis seal technique)
Level: Chunnin
Type: Ninjutsu
The user does the required hand seals then places their hand on the back of the targets neck, along the spinal column, producing a seal in the center of their neck. The seal is in the shape of a lightning bolt with a sealing circle around it and the seal itself stops electrical impulses from going down the spinal column to the rest of the body. Given the nature of the jutsu and its ability to completely subdue a target for a time, dependent on the user and the victim, the technique has been woven to allow the brain to continue to instruct the body to breath, pump blood, other things of that nature but the victim has no control over there body. Given the number of seals required to use this technique and the vantage point you have to have over the victim the technique is highly impractical to use against an enemy who isn't already subdues or of much lower caliber then the user.




Raiton- Hando Jouten (Hand of God)
Level: Jounin
Type: Ninjutsu
A much stronger play on the 'Lightning Crush' technique. Unlike lightning crush this technique can only be maintained on the main hand of the user, requiring an intricate array of hand seals and nearly perfect chakra control to be able to use. Powerful lightning chakra is formed around the main hand of the user, the chakra itself radiating off of the hand in a way that produces a cutting effect, tearing through mass when the user swipes, the chakra even tearing without the hand having to come in complete physical contact with the target. Flowing down the fingers of the user, chakra blades grind away at what ever they come in contact with producing a very intense scraping effect. The technique is very hard to maintain but given the energy required to initially form the technique it will last for a couple minutes before dissipating without having to pumped additional chakra into the technique.


Vega Style- Raiton- Kyuukyoku Shotto(Final Shot)
Level: Jounin
Type: Ninjutsu
By far Vega's most powerful ninjutsu technique and exclusively his technique given that it requires his claw weapon to perform. After activating the "Hando Jouten (Hand of god)" technique he forms a few additional hand seals and begins to form the technique. Pointing his claw arm at his target a small handle will flip out the side of his claw to stablize the technique for control and accuracy. Upon releasing the attack a beam of electrical chakra is released from his palm with unfathomable speed and piercing capability, but this is only the initial, leaving only a hole behind just smaller then the size that would be left by his fist. A powerful sonic boom after shock catches up with the technique brief moments later created,a much weaker but more wide spread path of destruction. The aftershock itself is generally know to be quite ineffective against shinobi but has been know to push them around quite a bit, however it is able to level homes a trees and has been know bore large holes into the ground too deep to see the bottom. This technique requires quite some time to use and a very large amount of chakra, more then other comparable high ranked lightning technique like 'chidori'


Taijutsu

Ninja Art: Compound Multi-Tool No-Jutsu
Level: Genin
Type: Taijutsu
Using electrical impulses from his brain through his hand into his metal glove, Vega can realign hundreds of small plates, rods, doodads and things from which the glove is comprised of to create numerous different tools. Small chakra cutters and welders, metal sheers and staples, miniature appendage for working with smaller components and much much more can created from these pieces of the glove. Most of the tools coming from the finger tips of the glove.


Funnu Arashi (Raging Storm)
Level: Genin
Type: Taijutsu
The user jumps to deliver first a kick from his or her most front leg, quickly spinning to deliver a swift back kick afterwards.


Kishou Arashi(Rising Storm)
Level: Genin
Type: Taijutsu
The user first delivers a kick to the lower body, weither to hit hard or knock the target off balance, then immediately jumps in the air, delivering a high kick to the upper body or bringing down a kick onto the target regardless of weither they are knocked down by the previous attack. If the target remains standing after the first hits the user will deliver more higher kicks.



Hata Arashi: (Looming Storm)
Level: Genin
Type: Taijutsu
The user delivers a powerful high kick then pushes off the opponent with their foot to bring down another kick ontop of the targets head.


Han Steppu(Half Step)
Level: Chunnin
Type: Taijutsu
A play on the 'Body flicker' technique. Requiring some chakra control and a well toned body the shinobi moves at high speeds, stepping in such a way that it appears that they are splitting into two persons, or appearing in two different places when staring or finishing a body flicker.


Han-Han Steppu(Half-Half Step)
Level: Chunnin
Type: Taijtusu
Very similar to the 'half step' technique, requiring no more skill to use however it does require a significant amount of speed generally supplied by the release of a chakra gate or the loss of a significant amount of weight, both things found in a few taijutsu specialist. Instead of being able to produce two illusions from the step used during the body flicker, the user can produce four creating a harder target to hit.




Genjutsu
Metalocalypse
Level: Chunnin
Type: Genjutsu
Once Vega's glove is destroyed, the peices remained suspended in place, using the powerful magnetic force and the extensive amount of chakra that is formed into it to control it. The dozens of fragments of the glove will remain suspended for a few brief moments giving Vega time to react before shooting off in all directions, the dozens of small fragments flying off in all directions. If any of these piece's hit a target they will be locked in the genjutsu until it is dispelled or the chakra in the piece falters. The number of fragments does affect the longevity of the technique. Once trapped in the gejutsu, it will appear that many more metal peices are flying at the victim, growing bigger and bigger, many of these will miss, flying passed, hitting the ground. Many large metal poles will fly at the victim, pinning them to the ground making them unable to move. Metal spikes an pillars will begin to erect themselves from the ground, more and more towering over the victim until there is nothing around them but black metal. Then many poles will begin to cross beam from tower to tower, many of them passing through the victim. This will eventually black out all light keeping the victim trapped in the dark until the genjutsu wares off.

Chakra Control

Withing his own body his chakra control is perfect or nearly so. His ability to mold chakra outside his body for ninjutsu however is sub par compared to most jounin.

Kekkei Genkai



_________________________________


Equipment, Items, Other

Weapons
Metal claw- Crafted of very strong metal as well as chakra absorbing metals Vega built a strong claw, the perfect extension of his own first. The glove was crafted of hundreds of small metal peices that interlocked intricately, wrapping around his hand and wrist. solid rods and plate, tiny doodads and things, shifting, sliding and locking in hundreds of alignments. He controls these actions this electrical impulses from him brain brought through his nerves and out of his hand into his glove using the electrical pulses from his hand to shift the pieces magnetically. The metal glove itself isn't very bulky and stretches up his fore arm stopping just a few inches short of his elbow. Using electricity to rearrange the hundreds of pieces in this tool allow him to extend and retract blades from it as well as several small tools hidden in the glove. The chakra metals found in the glove also give Vega increased chakra control as well as setting him up for a lot of strong ninjutsu.

Metal Glove- Opposite to Vega's metal claw Vega has a much less complex metal glove. The metal glove has the same interlocking pieces as the claw but they are all stationary aside from one or two small tools located in the fingers of the glove. Across all of the knuckles on this glove there is a solid metal plate. The glove goes half way up Vegas forearm and acts as both an effective offensive and defensive item.
Armor
Vega's Metal Claw and Metal Glove are both plated, constructed of high quality metal, built to take quite a beating in combat.
Kunaix10
ShurikenX20
Exploding TagsX10
Accessories
Two bands of leg weights on each leg. One pair looking far more worn and a tiny bit smaller then the other.
travel tool kit.
Miscellaneous
PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 1:54 am


Before you go any further with this, and I apologize for interrupting its construction, but unless you had a character affiliated with any of the villages that was above the rank of genin BEFORE this guilds creation, you cannot have a character that is above genin rank. Period.

The Crossed Fox


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 2:33 am


This character has been around since before the guild was around and has been a Jounin, I can attest to that as can most members of Hakumei.
PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 8:40 pm


Bump ofcourse ^^

Jouryoku Dann


Arcturus Highwind
Crew

PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 4:45 am


No idea what the half half step actually does.

I will say other than the Half step and the Half Half Step possibly, depending on how it gets defined that, the rest of your Taijutsu Jutsus don't actually FEEL like they should be Taijutsu Jutsus. Being able to follow up a strike into a two hit combo? Generally when I think of Taijutsu abilities I'm thinking of something a bit more special like the Primary Lotus.

Course we also have the obvious chidori rip off in there in your Hand of God technique. Not sure if anyone rightly cares about it but considering I've seen mods before say "No, you can't have that unless the appropriate canon character teaches it to you" I wonder. Seems like a backasswards way to get around a restriction that everyone else has to deal with, just calling it by another name.

Those are my only "problems". Which does mean you have three more free jutsu slots at least to work with.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 10:56 am


Half-Half step is essentially half steps next level kinda, making four kind of "blurs" of the person instead of the two that were made with half step. Its just way harder to use and these hologram sorta things are from him moving back and forth durring body flickers.
And Blah I know, I knew that they probably weren't necessary but my character is suppose to be a taijutsu specialist but I didn't have any attacks to put into taijutsu. Being the rock lee fan I am i figured id blow a few of my genin attacks I had to burn into signature moves baha. I used the majority of my jounin level attacks in my ninjutsu, that is what the good moves taijutsu moves (Lotus or something like it) are classified as yes?
as for being a chidori rip off, chidori is not really what im going for, the chidori i know is something you are kind of holding in your hand, this is like forming around your hand making almost chakra blade sorta things down your hands and it tears s**t up the same way as chidori does yes but Vega wants to be able to still use his hand, ya know move fingers potentially grab things. Do you know what I am saying?

Jouryoku Dann


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 11:25 am


I'm actually okay with most of the Taijutsu techniques, they remind me a lot of the Lion's Barrage, which was one of the first examples of a Taijutsu technique that we were introduced to. The only two I have trouble with are these:

Quote:
Han Steppu(Half Step)
Level: Chunnin
Type: Taijutsu
A play on the 'Body flicker' technique. Requiring some chakra control and a well toned body the shinobi moves at such a speed that they disappear from sight. The speed that the user must be moving at for this ability to work is greater then that of the ninja shimmer technique and can create faded illusions of more then one of the user if used properly.

Han-Han Steppu(Half-Half Step)
Level: Chunnin
Type: Taijtusu
Very similar to the 'half step' technique, requiring no more skill to use however it does require a significant amount of speed generally supplied by the release of a chakra gate or the loss of a significant amount of weight, both things found in a few taijutsu specialist.


There is a problem with 'speed up' attacks, in that they inherently make one person claim to be faster than another which can lead to No U arguments. Which isn't to say that either of these techniques should be dropped, in fact I actually have a rather cleaver idea that could help you somewhat maintain the integrity. Instead of running so fast you make 'illusion copies' of yourself, might I suggest that while running you create illusion copies traveling off to your sides? That way even if you ran at a normal pace, your opponent would have to choose between either yourself or one of the illusions that you 'spawned' to follow. It would actually be very similar to the illusion clone jutsu, but with the added twist that you would be doing it 'on the fly' while your running, instead of setting it up before-hand.

I'm not really keen on the Haidyo, because it suffers a similarity to the Half-Step and Half-Half-Step. Too much of a temptation to fall into No U arguments. I would suggest instead that that scrap the jutsu and talk with me over MSN, I've got a ton of idea's that would work well for your ninja.

I believe with the Lightning Crush technique, the way you intend for it to do additional damage is by shocking the opponent upon contact, correct? If so I would like it if you would specify that somewhere in the description. As for the Hand of God, from your description is sounds like this located on the back of your hand and made out of lightning. If that is so, it would be nice if you specified that in your jutsu description. If you need help with the wording, feel free to send me a message and we can work through it together.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 12:57 pm


It isnt the "speed" that is creating the illusion, its the step, He just runs in a certain way at the same speed a fast shinobi would to create the illusion. Thats why, when dropping leg weights or opening chakra gates (things that would speed up a shinobi) He is able to use the half-half step, creating more of an illusion.

And the "Hand of God technique" Covers the whole hand like a glove of tearing electrical chakra.

and i will fix the lightning crush

Jouryoku Dann


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 2:02 pm


Mkay, and just for the record, you'll need training to use the chakra gates under a canon character as I have pointed out to you, so you might want to wait on the half-half step (although I do have an alternative that you might appreciate involving lightning manipulation. We will discuss it over MSN.)

As for the Hand of God, reminds me of a technique I used to use with my character Tamahome Heero, the Ashen Glove techniques, which made techniques that burned to the touch, seems like your 'glove' shocks people upon contact, which is similar in nature but with a different element.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 2:26 pm


I see no problem in a technique like that. We are bond to run out of ideas with all the players so repeats are bond to happen.

Ocramol

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 2:28 pm


Ocramol
I see no problem in a technique like that. We are bond to run out of ideas with all the players so repeats are bond to happen.
Oh, I didn't mean there is something bad with it, just pointing out that it's a concept that has been accepting in the community.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 4:37 pm


I still fail to see any REAL difference between The Hand of God technique and Chidori.

Chidori: Lightning Chakra around the Hand.

Hand of God: Lightning Chakra around the hand.

Chidori: Rips through masses upon contact with the chakra.

Hand of God: Rips through masses upon contact with the chakra.

Chidori: Essentially a Tank Buster Melee Attack that requires high skill to use.

Hand of God: Essentially a Tank Buster Melee Attack that requires high skill to use.


The Name at this point is the only key difference.


This is an issue to me only because, we limit canon techniques to being in the hands of thier user's character, and ones directly ICily taught those techniques by those characters. Why have this limit if I can just go make a Rasengan, name it Ball 'o Doom and have it no trouble?

Arcturus Highwind
Crew


Jouryoku Dann

PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 6:30 pm


I didnt make the technique to be a "Tank buster"(piercing technique I assume is your meaning by this). I was to slash and hack at people with this technique, its not as brutal as chidori is, I primarily created it as a prerequisite technique to begin with, I have three more that moves that I had hope to bust out as this character progressed, its a fairly old character idea and have quite a bit planned for it.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 8:10 pm


It seems there is quite a lot of issue over this Hand of God technique. Let me suggest Dann that you go with a new approach, keep in mind that your part of a group and that not all of your technique need to be for pure offense.

We need a safe-cracker, think you could morph that move into a significantly more refined (maybe even just the size your finger) version that can be used to open up vaults and help us steal mad loot?

-Darkness_Complex-
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Jouryoku Dann

PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 4:36 am


If you look at the attack the description is significantly changed, highwind and I had a conversation last night and made revisions to it. From what I could tell he is cool with it now, but I had best not speak for him just in case he has something else to say.
as for the safe cracking thing i could do that, my glove (off hand glove, not claw) is suppose to be a 'bag of tricks' so to speak, I'm sure he could make a master key out of some s**t in there.
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