" darren walked up to the group of people ' hey guys' he said with a smile"
THAT is a no no!! for one his character was walking up to a group of people, If your a loaner you don't do that. and 'cold' usually implies that they are generally not very nice. this is what his post should have looked like:
"Darren stood in the shadow of one of the tall trees and looked at the group. they have no clue whats going to happen to them. he said, a wicked smile on his face"
this is better!
ok let's sum it up.
1) act like your character would
2) dont be cherry if your character profile says you are not
3) be careful when filling out profiles with a personality section, what you put on that is what people are expecting of your charracter
if you have any questions please post them here!
bye bye
