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The Lair of Shadows

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This guild is for all poeple that have a professional interest in all things literary. 

Tags: Writers, Poetry, Short-Stories, Writing, Creativity 

Reply The Poet's Nook
Dead's Watcher

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Good?
  whoa! That's like... the best poem ever dude! A++++++++++!!!
  that's pretty good! A
  I liked it! A few things that didn't flow, though, but still good! B
  Hmmm.... Very... interesting. I didn't like. go back and make some changes and then maybe I'll think it is better. C
  You should just quit with poetry right now. YOU IS A FAILURE!!!! :-P
  I hated that poem to much, I wouldn't mind gouging your eyeballs with you own teeth! Leave my family alone!!!!!!! We come in peace!!!!! D-----------------------------------------------
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damaged-reality

PostPosted: Thu Aug 13, 2009 9:22 am


Dead’s Watcher

Why don’t you look at me?
With your glazed eye: wild and free.
Why do your arms flail so much?
As if to grab something out of touch.
Why do you hunger for the flesh of mine?
Is your torment too strong; too painful; too divine?
Why is your skin so pale and dead?
Is the sting too much to bare or shed?
Why don’t you strive for the light?
Your body is trapped in this endless night.
And why do they hold you from the sea?
Is it because you’re a zombie for eternity?
PostPosted: Thu Aug 13, 2009 8:31 pm


A strange poem to be sure, though perhaps you should try something different than just AABB rhyme, like free form.  

Shallarinath
Captain

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The Poet's Nook

 
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