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 Posted: Sun Jul 19, 2009 5:01 pm
Alright guys. I am a movie junkie. Admittedly, I can't go to the theatre very often, but when I do, I go to see what I hope is good stuff.
HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE IS NOT GOOD STUFF.
At least, not for someone who has read the book. Then again, this comes as no surprise as the last three films have also been untrue to the literary genius of J.K. Rowling. HOWEVER, this one is the worst cheater by far. *SPOILER* They burned Ron's house down. This was NOT in the book, nor did it make any sense. And they completely left out the first battle of hogwarts, and Dumbledore's funeral. They ALSO completely missed the Dursleys and Kreacher. Not to mention other things that were added in or left out that completely put me over the edge.*END SPOILER*
If you watch the movies because you don't feel like reading the books:
1: You are lazy. Go. Read a damn book. Reading never killed anyone.
2: You are missing much more than you think. Hollywood is feeding you mass amounts of schlock that has nothing to do with the potterverse.
If you watch the movies because you want to refresh your memory of what happened in the book:
1: This movie cheats so badly on the book that watching it is like going through an entirely different story. The only things that they really kept the same was the inferius attack and Hagrid and Slughorn's drunken party.
2: Book to movie interpretations seldom stay true to the original plotline. The only movies I can say that does this extremely well, omitting very little is Lord of the Rings, and the first and second Potter movies.
If you watch the movies because you've read the books:
1: You most likely will not enjoy this. I myself found it to be rather dull and slow-paced.
2: You will most likely wish to strangle the director or walk out of the theatre half way through. Had my mother not been sitting next to me, I would've done the same.
I rate this 2 out of 5 stars, only because the inferius attack was almost everything I had hoped it would be.
(Got a movie you want me to review? A movie that perhaps your friend wants you to watch but you think it will suck? PM me the movie, and I may find time to review it for you. :3)
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Posted: Tue Aug 25, 2009 2:17 pm
Alright guys...I dunno if anyone reads this or not, but screw it! <3
I went to see both Orphan and Inglorious Basterds. I'll start with Orphan.
ORPHAN:
First, let me start off by saying that this move is not for the faint-of-heart. It's loaded with suspense, it keeps you on the edge of your seat the entire time, and the plot twist at the end knocks you flat on your a**.
It's got a little bit of everything for every horror geek. Suspense, marvelous backstory, a little gore, fantastic plot that keeps you guessing, and one crazy, psychotic, homocidal orphan.
It's basically about this couple who lost a baby and then decide to adopt an orphan, but they get quite a bit more than they bargained for. Be warned, the first 15 minutes of this movie are absolutely gut-wrenching and tear-inducing.
I give it a 5/5 because it made me feel fear, anger, sadness, happiness, and joy. It's an emotional roller coaster. And the plot twist? Superb.
INGLORIOUS BASTERDS:
This movie is a thrill ride. It's everything that Quentin Tarantino fans have come to expect from him. Explosions, action, crazy characters, and a great story.
This movie is set in Germany during World War II and the Third Reich. It's basically about these guys "The Basterds" led by a man named Aldo Raines. They do one thing, and one thing only: Kill Nazis.
It's really suspenseful, it's got a good ending, HOWEVER, Quentin, being the naughty boy that he is, rewrote history. I can't tell you how, but he's getting a point knocked off my review for that.
Also, there are alot of graphic scenes in this movie involving a baseball bat, gunfights, and...a little bit of old indian tradition.
I give this movie a 4 out of 5.
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Posted: Sun Nov 22, 2009 12:36 pm
Alright! I've gone and seen a buttload of movies. So here's teh reviews. razz
ZOMBIELAND
This movie was hilarious. Not only did they combine a good ol' fashioned zombie flick with a gut-busting comedy, but they also did it with Woody Harrelson in a leading role.
It's a story about 4 zombie apocalypse survivors, namely Talahassee and Columbus, who are trying to fight off the zombies and live, all for a twinkie. Yes, that's right ladies and gents, a twinkie. It's a movie all about facing your fears, taking chances, and double-tapping. I give it a 5 out of 5 for the amazing plot, the jokes, the action, and the amazing characters. It is a must-see. P.S.: There is an awesome cameo in this movie. I won't say who. But he rules. <3
Jim Carrey's A Christmas Carol
This movie is okay. I think the only two things that really make it different from any other christmas carol movie are Jim Carrey's unique style of humor, and the amazing special effects. It's not for very small children because of some death-related scenes and scary jump-out-at-you moments. I give this movie a 3 out of 5.
2012
This movie is about the Apocalypse, obviously. It's actually an incredible movie, the special effects blew me away, and it kept my attention the entire time. I can seriously admit that I almost wet myself I was so frightened in some spots. It's amazingly realistic, the characters in this one are amazing, and WOODY HARRELSON makes a cameo appearance as a crazy bum who likes pickles. What more could you ask for? 4 out of 5.
After Wednesday, I will have a review of THE BOONDOCK SAINTS II: ALL SAINT'S DAY, so if you're interested, keep an eye out for it. ^.^
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Posted: Thu Nov 26, 2009 4:06 pm
BOONDOCK SAINTS II: ALL SAINTS DAY
If you loved the first Boondock Saints movie, I definitely suggest going to see this sequel. Murphy and Connor McManus are back with more action, more excitement, more mafia killing, an awesome backstory on their father Il Duce, and even more Yakavetta family slayings.
Basically, the boys return to Boston from Ireland to avenge the death of a very well-known priest because the person who killed the priest decided to be a dumbass and put pennies over his eyes as if the Saints themselves had murdered him.
And don't worry guys, the comedy factor is still there, and loveable side characters such as Doc "******** a**" the bartender and Rocco make it back, along with a new character, a Mexican named Romeo. I give it a 5/5. This sequel was worth the 8 year wait.
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