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Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 5:46 pm
Yeah, I know he's in Tang Soo Do, but he's still a karateka. Here's a list of some funny a** Chuck Norris Fun Facts:
1. Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares it to grow.
2. Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
3. Chuck Norris' tears are the only known cure for cancer. Unfortunately, he never cries.
4. When Chuck Norris does a push-up, he doesn't lift himself up, he pushes the earth down.
5. There is no theory of evolution, only a list of creatures Chuck Norris let live.
6. Chuck Norris doesn't play God, playing is for children.
7. Chuck Norris once played a game of Crazy Planes. We know this event as 9-11.
8. Chuck Norris doesn't own a house, he just walks into random buildings and people move out.
9. Chuck Norris doesn't have a CTRL key on his computer, he's always in control.
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Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 11:18 pm
I heard Chuck Norris feasts on a steady intake of glass shards, ricin and infants; he washes it down with lemon flavored mercury.
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 1:18 am
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 1:19 am
There is no chin under Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist. xD
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 6:02 am
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 4:25 pm
Little kids wear Superman Pajamas, Superman wears Chuck Norris Pajamas.
Chuck Norris doesn't catch a cold, he chases it.
Chuck Norris, at one time had testicular Cancer, they removed it and sent it into space so no one could clone him. We now know it as Jupiter.
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 6:46 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 08, 2009 5:20 am
The Headless Gummie Bear Chuck Norris, at one time had testicular Cancer, they removed it and sent it into space so no one could clone him. We now know it as Jupiter. Holy crap!!! rofl rofl rofl rofl
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Posted: Wed Jul 08, 2009 5:27 pm
When the boogie man goes to bed at night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris!
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Posted: Sat Jul 11, 2009 12:47 am
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Posted: Sat Jul 18, 2009 1:37 am
Chuck Norris once had sex in the back of his dad's fire truck. A little bit of his semen landed on the seat however. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
An ice berg didn't sink the Titanic, it was the icy cold stare of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't dance, he round-house kicks to the beat.
The Iraqi army surrendered so fast in Desert Storm because they heard that Chuck Norris was coming.
Chuck Norris' smile once brought a puppy back to life.
When Chuck Norris makes his daily coffee, he grinds the beans with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
There's no use crying over spilled milk, unless it's Chuck Norris' spilled milk, because you're going to die.
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