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Okay, so tell me if your parents are like this. When my mom and dad found out that I was going Goth/Emo, they totally flipped out. My mom is usually the one who takes me shopping (14, so I can't drive yet) and she's trying to not let me buy anything black because I'm not "looking like a ******* christian". My dad's like, "I'm not gunna put up with your Gothic s**t. If I have to stop you myself, I will." Every time I act out, they're saying "You can't say you're christian and act like this." I think to myself, When the **** have I ever said that I'm a ******* christian? NEVER." God, I hate them so much. They're the type that are super religious, yet they swear and hit me. Oh, ya. One of my friends, Kayla, is starting to get concerned about me and my family. She says that my parents are abusive because they beat (not trying to overuse it), hit, throw things at me, and swear A LOT at me. Plus, I say my brother (16) needs to go to anger management cuz he hits me a lot. He punched me (HARD) just under my ribs today. Oh, okay. I got a story to tell. We were standing around in my kitchen when my brother started eating a whole bowl of koolwhip. I thought he shouldn't get to because who eats a WHOLE bowl? I pulled on his shirt to get him down to my level then tried to get the bowl. He tried to kick my knee to break it so I'd fall and let go, but instead he kicked the cabinet door and broke it off completely. And I GOT BLAMED FOR THE WHOLE ******* THING! No, it wasn't his fault he destroyed the cabinet, it was MINE! So, I went up to my room pissed and called my brother a moron (can't swear at home, ugh) and he came flying up the steps and pushed me from my doorway. I almost tripped over my bed and rammed my head into the wall. It didn't make a hole, but DAMN did it hurt. Then my mom comes, helps me up. I started to say thanks, and she slaps me across the face. I'm thinking like WTF?! After that, I just got yelled & sweared at really bad. I had to stay in my room for a full week, except to eat a little. Does this happen to ANYBODY besides me? emo emo emo emo

1. Just because you can't wear all black doesn't mean you can't be "gothic". If you have the mindset, you're fine. Listen to the music, accessorize your clothes in an awesome way, don't worry about everything being black. It's boring that way anyway.
2. Some of this is your fault, no offense. If you didn't think your brother should eat a whole bowl of koolwhip, why not just SAY, "I don't think you should eat a whole bowl of koolwhip,"? Why try to steal the bowl? That was a little immature.
3. You don't need to swear, it's no big deal. They're just words. Don't get upset about not being allowed to use them.
4. Your parents might suck, but you can't change them, so figure out how to change yourself. Do everything they ask, don't talk back, don't act out, don't argue with your brother even if he starts it. Pretty much, be a perfectly behaved girl. They'll chill.

I only said deal with it because she's 14. There's not much else she can do in the mean time. She's got years to go before she'd be able to move out. She's kind of stuck. :/

Honestly, the way you dress is something that really shouldn't hold a whole lot of bearing. You should be able to dress normally and stand out and get along with your friends, or they/you are superficial and need to get over it. Try dressing in a semi-normal fashion, with your own little things added. I can admire someone's hair or clothes all I want, but it is intelligence and maturity that really can make me want to be their friend.

Here's my advice: Save your money. Get good enough of grades to get into a decent university where you can stay in a dorm. And, ultimately, put up with them. You can say you will cut them out of your life, but that would probably be a very stupid choice. If you are like the majority of middle class Americans, your parents are probably trying to save money to send you to college. They do not have to do this. You do not want to have to work your way through college. It is not a fun thing to do. You're fourteen now, but in two years you'll want a car. Insurance and gas is expensive. It would be very difficult for you to buy a car, keep up the insurance, and pay for gas. The best way to do this would be to have a job, but to have a job, most of the time you need to be 16 and have a car so you can drive there. Therefore, unless your parents buy you a car, which if you keep arguing with them, they might not, or continuously drive you to work, you can't get a job. Getting a car, having a job, and moving into a dorm are all ways of gaining independence. Oh, and make friends that can drive. That can help a lot.



In other words: Stay on the good side of your parents. Gain their trust. Stop cussing excessively, and stop acting out. It generally will bring you benefits. Stop fighting over stupid things. Take advantage of being a kid in America, where most parents will provide most everything.

This is all based on my experience from a suburban middle class area. I am applying what I have found to be true here to most areas of America. I might be wrong.


Oh, and emancipation might be legally possible, but your situation isn't bad. You really shouldn't get emancipated.

Thing is it doesn't matter what you're doing you are conforming. So do it to make yourself happy not to fit in with a crowd. I dress all over the place, listen to every genre of music. I feel what I feel. And I'm sure they've got a name for it.

I get what you mean but I simply won't do it if Yadi isn't cool with it.
What name would fit us all? Therein lies the hardest part.

I'm happy to hear all arguments on the subject, for and against, as I am with all guild matters.