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TamiNii_13

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Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2009 8:40 pm

Well, I have dumped my old boyfriend, and my friend recently told me he loved me. I felt the same way during my old relationship. but my mom found some things in my phone that I'd rather only be seen by him. She is threatening to call his parents and getting him & me separated. I've been thinking about cutting but I'm scared. How was you're first time? I've also stopped eating for the past few days and I dont know what to do.

Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2009 11:33 pm

Ah well there's one lesson here - never keep incriminating evidence on your phone.
Now to keep things under control I'd cool the relationship down, not off just down - though what your Mum is doing going through your things and telling you who can love is a mystery to me. Not to mention telling people they should be apart won't help.
Do not cut!!! Aside from having to deal with scars later on in life you won't want it can lead to infection and that's ever so un-pretty. Your body is your temple so treat it with respect. If you need to let out some frustration take up a sport or something you can really unleash your anger on like a punching bag.
It's natural to not want to eat when your dealing with depression. It's a feeling I've been dealing with in and out of for over a month, and here's a tip - alcohol and recreation don't always help. You're hunger will return but for the meantime you've got to eat a little to save yourself from passing out and to keep your strength up. Trust me it'll help you emotionally to be physically healthy.
You need to take some time out every day just for you, to do something you enjoy undisturbed. And keep socially connected with friends you trust. They can help you immensely by just being there.

little_evil_goth
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TamiNii_13

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Posted: Sun Mar 15, 2009 8:04 am

I do take sports, i just seem to be getting worse at them. Whenever something really emotional happens I start to shake uncontrollably even during practices. That makes things worse cuz my mom thinks I should get a scholarship from basketball. Thats a bit crazy because I am so short though. My mom does control my life to much crying

Posted: Sun Mar 15, 2009 2:57 pm

Sounds like you need to sort some boundaries out with her before tackling the other problems, its hard to deal with things when a parent is bearing down on you, something I know from experience.

I wouldn't cut also by the way, when people find out they tend to friek out to the point of no return, for some reason people seem to identify it with suicide the moment they see it, all in all it just adds a whole lot more chaos and confusion to the mix not something you really need.

Finally if its causing trouble in sports you need to find the zone shall we say, a point of nothingness in your head when you can remove all unwanted emotion for the time necessary, its something I found invaluable in my fighting and It helped in sports when I was in school too, in other words you need to find a piece of mind where you can separate anything unnecessary and focus on whats important, meditation helps you gain it and it can help in any situation but best of all it gives you a break really from your life when you need it.

Akiraluckystar
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little_evil_goth
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Posted: Tue Mar 17, 2009 12:07 am

Akira is most certainly right. I'd definitely sort some boundaries with her.

Posted: Tue Mar 17, 2009 12:16 am

You're mother shouldn't even be looking in your phone in the first place. I guess I'm lucky. My mom doesn't know how to work anything that has to do with technology.

You need to eat hun, Keep up your strenght. Otherwise you'll pass out. Not a fun thing to do.

loser-by-choice

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Mii Momo

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Posted: Wed Mar 18, 2009 10:46 pm

Im rlly sorry all of this is happening, but I say first off:
LISTEN! So far the advice on here you have been given is the way to go..I was in deep depression for most of my life and I had one hall of a way getting through it [[I would chat about that another time, talking about the straight jacket and biting cops wont help you here]]
DONT CUT! What ever you do, thats what NOT to do...I reciently have done that, but I have my own special reasons why, but thats because I dont feel much pain but what I inflict on myself, and I dont mind the scars because I have my body pierced and tattooed, so I dont mind. but I dont incourage it in ANY cause.
DONT DRINK YOUR PROBLEMS AWAY!! My mother does that, and Ill tell you whatr my friend, it just makes matters worse [[same with drugs]]
Sports are indeed a good way to let out anger, but thats not always the only way to let it out, sometimes you just want to scream, and sometimes screaming is a great way or releaving stress. Sometimes I like to take a pillow to my bed and scream nice a long until Im out of breath, and then drink some water for my throat.
EAT! Dont eat like a pig, but just kinda munch a little here and there, if your not hungry, its understandable, in many cases like yours I would rather puke my stomach out than eat, but if your stomach is unsettled, drink something that is low in the pH level, nothing to acidy [[I find that it leads to getting really bad heart burn]]
Try reasoning with your boyfriend about things and agree to chill out, and talk to your mom..I have a feeling I know what it was she found, though Im not sure and I dont want to know..but try talking to her...I dont have the best advice as what to say because me and my mom arent really like daughter mother stature...we are more of the room mate relationship, so she and I dont really talk that much.
A lot of people may tell you to write down your feelings, but I dont recomend it because parents being snoopy [[you know no this]] will find it, and read it...and it wouldnt make anything better at all, so if you plan on writing your feelings out on paper, I suggest ripping it into many many many many little pieces of paper and flushing it town the toilet, its a specialty of mine [[except I fill a glass of water and make pulp xD]]
I hope things work out [[have worked out]] for you

Best Wishes - Nevermore

Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 8:31 pm

Thanks for the help guys! My friends have started to notice how controlling my mom is. I'm thinking about moving in with my dad and step mom. My top reasons are:
Dad- I've never seen my dad for a full month before going back to dear old mom. Also he had to move just as frequently as me and understands part of what I'm going through.
Step Mom Elizabeth- I want to help with her two infant kids. I have a brother that I live with at moms but the other two, I feel so much more protective over and it kills me not to see them grow up. Another thing, I'd be able to speak more openly to Elizabeth.
My mom always complains about me not being open with her but it really is all her fault. Whenever I act like who I am or who I want to be, she tells me I'm annoying and it isn't who I really am. She said this in front of my friend yesturday. That made me so mad, not only did she take away my pride by acting bitchy in front of my friend but she made me feel very self conscious and ruined my friends time. The reason I have the friends I do is cuz I act like myself, the one my mom won't except. Any other things you could help with? This one seems tougher if you ask me.

TamiNii_13

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