Welcome to Gaia! ::

It's not uncommon to have these thoughts and feelings. I've had them all once before. Up to the time I feel I was called by God, I was various things. The last thing I was before being called to him though, was a follower of Norse Paganism. However, after almost a year I suppose, I began to feel empty. As if the gods had abandoned me, and that I would find no way to Valhalla. However, during a time I felt this way, I was reached out in certain ways. While in my Army liason at the St. Louis MEPS, a man walked by, handed me a Gideons pocket New Testament, and walked away smiling after I told him thanks. I imagine he was just a human being, but you know, they say to be careful how you entertain strangers, or you just may be entertaining angels. But that's taking it a little far.

I think Paganism taught me a great deal about living one's faith and embracing it. It's also opened my eyes to many practices and mysteries of life I may not otherwise have understood. So I'm thankful for the knowledge it has brought upon me spiritually. It makes me a better person, and one more apt to helping others in spiritual matters, sometimes completely regardless of their faith. I know a deal about a few faiths. I have to, it's my job.

If you're ever feeling at a dead end, or that your sins may be catching up to you, let me know. Feel free to talk to me anytime you may need to. Perhaps God is letting you go for you to find what you must in life to learn, and grow. Maybe, one day, He will call you back to Him as he did me. Maybe you will find your answers elsewhere. For now, don't let your journey into spirituality be obstructed. Let go your guilt and fears, and carry on as you must. You will find your way through time, and I wish you luck with it. Have a blessed day.

Agnostics don't offer nothingness, they simply acknowledge that they don't know. They admit that they are not sure. Many agnostics lead spiritually rich lives without serving any particular god(s). Atheists also don't offer nothingness, they offer only belief in fact, of belief in science. They hold science and scientific method in such high regard as to almost equate it to godhood. I personally am searching, so I don't have any particular religion to direct you towards. You may want to check out some of the threads in M&R or the rehab guild. There are many people there who are educated in both Abrahamic and Pagan religions who may be able to answer your questions.

Thanks for the link. *Goes to check it out*