Welcome to Gaia! ::

First off, your story sounds really interesting. I saw the movie Memento and liked it immensely - combining that with Final Fantasy VII should make for a memorable fic.

Secondly, I'd like to point you in the direction of The Fanfiction Exchange Thread. It's a place where you can ask an author to give constructive criticism on your story, in exchange that you give some to theirs in return. It's all good people there, we haven't run across any flamers or trolls (yet ^^; ).

Finally, should I leave that review on FFnet or would you prefer it if I sent it in by PM or posted it here? ^^

Hi! No, I didn't forget about you... the reason it took me so long to reply was because I had to take some time to figure out what I'd say about your fic! There were some things about it that I liked, some things that I thought were very well done, some things that I thought could perhaps have been better explored, but I couldn't put my finger on why exactly this fic did not captivate me. So I had to think about it a bit.

I really liked the first person point of view. It worked beautifully and it was a huge surprise to find out just who the narrator was because it sounded so different from present-time Tifa (and a bit contradictory that at one point she had such a deep understanding of her condition - but that was part of the reason it worked so amazingly well). At first, I had my bet on Reno because of the summary, haha.

I also loved your writing style - it's subtle and yet does not fail to make a point. The whole fic breathes quiet despair... it really conveys how helpless Tifa became and how sad it was for those around her to see her fall - tragic. As for grammar? Impeccable as far as I could tell.

But then, here was one of the things that I didn't quite like. You hint at but never quite explore the events in-between the accident that doomed Tifa and the present, and therefore it was very odd to see everyone turning their backs on a close friend. For instance, what's the story with Reno? How did he go from an enemy to Cloud's replacement as Tifa's support? It wasn't even clear up until half-way through that Tifa had indeed married Cloud and not some other guy - and on a story that's as short as this, I see those gaps as something of a flaw.

But it's possible that that ambiguity was a conscious choice on your part - after all, Tifa herself clearly didn't know everything that had happened - and if that's the case, then it's ok.

This wasn't what bothered me (though "bother" may be too much of a strong word here) most. What did (I think) was how childish Tifa acted. At the time of FFVII, she did have a bit of an unhealthy attraction to Cloud, but she was also a very strong woman in her own right. She should have retained some of this strength, because if she is indeed "frozen in time" then that means that she never grows and her personality never changes. Seeing her act so submissively was disturbing.

Overall, though, I thought this was an extremely well done piece of fanfiction. I can see that it wouldn't appeal to the typical reader of FFnet because it's so tragic and serious, but speaking for myself I truly enjoyed the level of detail and character introspection you put into it. Despite all that I've said above, it was definitely moving, so... nicely done!

You don't have to read any of my fics just to return the favour. I had a great time reading yours, so that's "payment" enough. If you insist, though, just follow the link on my sig to my Naruto ficlets and pick one at random. There probably isn't much to comment on, because they're all so short, haha... ^^'

Glad to have been of help! I'd love to read the revised version as well afterwards (if indeed you intend to revise it).
Ahh, you can leave the reviews on the story thread itself... you really don't have to, but thanks!