Welcome to Gaia! ::

I know that some of you are college age so you might be able to relate to this a bit more. I'm going to be honest. For all my education and all that I've read and worked, I don't even have a degree.

A lot of my peers find this to be very odd since I seem to know more than they do. My boyfriend, a Ph.D. student, has even said that my thinking ability is that of a graduate student. My own family thinks it's ridiculous and that I'm wasting my life after finishing high school with flying colours. At the time, I didn't want a degree. Well, I still don't want a degree but it's almost a responsibility to my family to work for one.

The biggest roadblock towards this goal is that I don't want to lose my freedom within the realm of learning. I'm deathly afraid of losing this freedom. But at the same time, I know that I need to get my lousy degree so that I could get a job with a higher salary, and calm my parents' minds that I'm not some rebellious eccentric intellectual who will live the second half of my life as a hobo. Plus, one of my goals is to be able to earn enough so that my parents can retire comfortably and live with me and/or my younger brother.

So right now, I'm studying economics, doing fine for the most part. My parents like my choice of major after their loud protests during my visual arts and music phases. But the roadblock is that I find so many flaws in economics. For example, I can't wrap my head around the idea of marginal utility (you seriously think happiness can be measured?) so now I'm doing my own research outside of the requirement and it "slows my whole learning process down".

Everything is telling me I should just bite the bullet and nod at every discourse and ideology thrown at me, but it feels like brainwash... yes, at the university level. If you think high school was bad - where you just memorize facts, university is worse - where you memorize thought processes and apply them.

Is there any coping method that you can think of? I like what I'm learning because I like arguing against the concepts. But it's really slowing me down. And in the long run, from what my boyfriend has told me, the brainwashing just keeps going until you've gained tenure.... So all I'm aiming for is a teeny tiny bachelor's and then I'm running the hell away from academia.

The other part of me says I should just get brainless training and a brainless job so that I would have the freedom to study whatever the hell I want. So far, the two choices I've narrowed down to are cartography and wind turbine technology. Both of them sound straightforward enough. I don't have any troubles with mathematics, logic or manual dexterity.

Economics for a braindead degree? Or braindead certificate?

Thing is I can't really decide which is the lowest thing possible: the degree or the certificate? I guess I feel pretty comfortable with what I'm studying right now, in terms of choice of major. It's just that my visible progress is extremely slow and I'm a pain in the a** to certain higher-ups lol

And while I thank you for your suggestions, I don't think the coping mechanisms you're using will be of much help to me. It's more a lack of intellectual freedom than overall freedom. I'm quite self-indulgent though, so I'm still researching whever the hell I want regardless of what people say. But it's not efficient if the goal is to obtain a degree.

I guess, but I could also turn it around and say that not thinking about it means that I'm subjecting myself to brainwash. Or am I just finding excuses? And if I am, for what? It's not like I'm trying to avoid studying either.

And the other side of me agrees with your optimistic point of view. I really should get it the hell over with and wipe my a** with the degree or something. While I was still studying visual arts (and under the illusion that I can turn a passion into a career), I had actually imagined different ways of incorporating my shredded transcript into a piece of artwork after graduation.

I'm still kind of in limbo, but thanks for bringing me a bit closer to Earth.

(And uhh... I guess it's a glitch with the editing thing? They seem to be changing some of the buttons right now.)

Aye. That is true. I guess all I really have to do is keep my mind in check. And earlier today, after talking to a few other friends, they were saying I might be having this little mini-crisis because I was over-working myself previously and that I need a REAL method of blowing off steam (because the internet isn't working 100%).

One of them offered to ask her friend if I could go to his place occasionally to play the piano. I've been having cravings ever since I quit studying music. gonk

I can't personally comment on the stuff taught in economics classes, but I would say the primary purpose of an undergrad degree is not just to learn stuff, but to learn how to learn stuff. Being awarded a degree means you have shown people that you have a core understanding of a particular field, as well as the capacity to assimilate and understand new information.

Most of the proper 'learning' takes place after your degree, in graduate school.

I've had a relatively positive experience with college. I have a degree in theoretical physics and a masters in mathematics/scientific computing, and will hopefully have a PhD in the next couple of years.

Yaay. I think that it is good that you can have some relief for a temporary closing case. Yeah, this school issue is also part of why I haven't been around... garr.. darn finals. But, now its over with! I think its always healthy to re-visit this topic... but defintely on some other time. :3