|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 6:54 pm
0_o...I hope this is the right place to post poetry...I think it is. sweatdrop sweatdrop
A Voice in the Dark
"Hello? Who's there?"
said a voice in the dark.
"What's that sound?
So lonely and stark?"
Said the questioning voice
to the weeping air
"Hello? Can you hear me?
Is anyone there?"
Soft as a whisper,
light on the breeze,
Came the reply
with the simplest of ease.
"Here I am. So,
don't dwell here too long.
Don't speak to me now,
for I'm too far gone."
Said the whispering voice,
to the questioning one,
"No. Don't stay with me here,
for I'm too far gone."
Quick, came a response
to the mourning voice,
"Why, alone, do you cry?
Is this by your choice?"
"Yes." was the answer
sorrowful and low
"I need to be alone now.
Please, just go."
"Why would you stay,
in such an awful place?"
More questions came
Offering grace
"I need to be here.."
Was the only reply
"Freedom, such a fragile wish,
will always die."
Said the curious one,
"Why are you sad?
Alone in this room,
all in black clad?"
So told the whisper,
to the curiosity,
"I'm mourning a loss.
Someone dear you see.
To remain here,
holding on for so long...
Don't speak to me now,
for I'm too far gone."
"Just a few more questions.
Answer them please?
Then I'll be done,
and then I will leave."
A moment of silence
swept through the dark
and quietly, slowly
the arrow hit it's mark.
"Just two more I'll answer.
Only two answers I'll tell.
These are your last,
so be careful, choose well."
The questioning voice,
thought a moment, and knew
the right ones to ask.
And just what to do.
"What is your name?
And who's death are you mourning?"
Said the curious one,
oblivious to scorning.
The whispering voice turned
to the curiosity then
and in that silent place,
answered it.
"Why, cant you tell?
I am your sanity.
And the death I am mourning,
is that of me."
a K.C. original. whee Dats mee.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 7:46 pm
That's cool. It has a good surprise at the end. I like how you made it seem there were two individuals. I like the soft as a whisper, light on the breeze line. And this is the right place for poetry and anything written. 3nodding
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 8:33 pm
whee Thanks! Cool I got it right! gonk I was worried no one would like it cuz I don't do well with criticism! gonk Another? I believe so!! whee Katie
Smiles on the walls,
crayons on the floor
toys scattered everywhere
looking from the door
some may glance at this
and see a huge mess
I see a child's playroom
one whom I wish to bless
with marker on her little hands
and cookie crumbs on her face
there she is asleep on her toys
dreaming of a timeless place
where she can play all day
and never have to sleep
when in truth I'm tucking her in
and I'll just have to keep
Playing with her and smiling
though she'll have hardly known
that all those years flew by like wind
and she is fully grown.
This is a K.C. original For my baby sister. crying I still call her my 'baby' sister, but she's 5 now. She was....I think she'd just turned 4 when I wrote this. crying
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 6:05 pm
*ninjas a random short as-of-yet-untitled poem into her list* ninja
I wished for you a happy dream
To comfort you throughout the night
But wishes don't come true it seems.
So hide away till morning's light.
a K.C. original. mrgreen ninja
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 8:49 pm
Katie:
"Playing with her and smileing" Smileing should be smiling.
It has a lovely rhyme scheme in it. It has nice imagery.
Untitled:
Nice short poem. You could definitely add more to it.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 1:16 am
Katie:
sweatdrop eh-heh....fixed it.
Untitled:
sweatdrop Thanks.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 10:45 am
West Virginian Night
West Virginia, mountain's mother
Beautiful, she's like no other.
Song birds perch, upon the trees,
Singing their song to the evening breeze
Crickets chirp, as the night draws near
While trotting through the woods, goes a family of deer.
In sweet Autumn, the valley glows
with greens, reds, yellows, oranges, and golds.
As the last of the colors, dance over the sky
children gaze up, and dream they could fly.
Now the stars look like raindrops,
on the black widow's web,
as lavender flows over the sky instead.
The early dew looks like Fairies tears
that came with the morning's light.
Because they wished, they hadn't missed,
the beautiful,
mountain,
night.
a K.C. original.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 6:09 pm
Hey, when'd you join? biggrin you were my late night talk buddy during the summer if I remember right.
These poems are awesome! Slight suggestion on West Virginian Night, and it is more of a person preference suggestion than "I decree it so you must change it!"
"West Virginia, mountain's mother
Beautiful, she's like no other. "
I think the second line sounds better if you switch the position of "she's"
"West Virginia, mountain's mother
She's beautiful, like no other. "
But as I said, personal preference, if you prefer it the way you originally posted it keep it that way.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2008 3:29 pm
whee I know! You and Joker where two of the main reasons I joined! I saw you and I was like "OH MAH GAWD!!! MOM!! IT'S THAT ONE PERSON WHO HELPED ME WHEN I WAS BEING A TARD!!!" XD;; Yeah good times...goood tiiimes...
rofl Ok. I'm done now. Yeah, W.V. Night was my first ever un-force poem. I was bored out of my wits sitting in A.L.C.(Alternative Learning Center. in other words, I broke into someone's locker and so they decided I needed to sit in a little box all day with a teacher staring at me. And it was creepy! gonk crying ) I just outta the blue started writing. And viola! It came out as a poem. That is the original version. I just wanted to keep it that way for sentimentality. sweatdrop
Anyway. Hi Onee-chan!! whee
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2008 3:47 pm
Makes sense. biggrin Glad to see you joined up. It is a fun guild, small but still interesting.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2008 4:04 pm
whee Cool. *slips another short poem into her list*Bwahahahaha... ninja What?
A Song of Sunrise
With silhouettes of trees and woods
the forest awakens flooded by gentle light.
The beasts all rise, both fierce and good,
as morning melts from this silent night.
Dew rests upon the rose petals red
as scarlet streams in 'cross the dryad's beds
Enter the Angels with out stretched wings,
singing this song, that the sunrise brings.
a K.C. original. I know it sounds, off. sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2008 4:52 pm
Awesome. I wish I was a poet, its soo much easier to grind out poems while bored in class than to grind out stories while doing homework. biggrin I used to write poems but they were all angsty and not very good.
This may be out of the blue but do you want to do NaNoWriMo with me? Right now I know no one who is doing it, and this is my first year. sad
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 12:22 am
0_o;;......that was outta the blue...But, sure I guess. It'll help you right? Then, ok. sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 7:37 am
you don't have to if you don't want too. I think you'd be good to sign up as a young writer too. I'll go check out the site.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 2:28 pm
Dew rests upon the rose petals red is a really good imagery line.
You are really good at using images in your poems. They are all really good. 3nodding
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
