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X-Just a box of crayons-X

PostPosted: Mon Jul 07, 2008 5:18 pm


((((Okay I'm a bit nervous about posting this it's just a story I write in my spare time.So please if you are reading this and choose to comment go easy on me.... it's chapter or part one in my story....))))
Autumn walked silently through the halls of her high school.She watched the other high school kids whispering muttering about her.Autumn rolled her eyes flicking off a few of them.She was odd different out of place.Her parents had died in a car crash a few years back so 15 year old Autumn Grimmheart had escaped from the orphanage and had lived in her parents old house ever since.Autumn walked into her seventh period Math class.She listened to the teacher blabber on about angles again!What seemed like a lifetime later the final bell rang.Autumn walked out alone.She was walking home to an empty house so who cared how long she stayed out or why?Autumn dropped her school things on a rock and walked into the woods.She sat on a bridge skipping rocks.She eventually bored herself and decided to head home.No home wasn't the right word for it, he house on the hill was better.Autumn walked alone down the dark empty street.Autumn could here the distinct sound of footsteps behind her.She turned around there was no one there.Autumn started walking again.There was the sound of footsteps again.Autumn sped up.The footsteps sped up too.Autumn spun around to look behind her no one there.Suddenly something hit the back of her head Hard! She moaned and collapsed to the ground.Autumn heard a few voices "Brandon!We told you not to use the baseball bat!"One said.Another said "Yea Brandon what are you trying to do give the poor girl a concussion?" "Maybe.."The one who was evidently Brandon.But Autumn suddenly blacked out.
((There's the story I know it hasn't taken off yet I'm kinda sucky at begginings but......please comment!!!))  
PostPosted: Mon Jul 07, 2008 5:25 pm


Well, the story is good so far. The only problem you have is grammar and puncuations. . . I have some spelling problems, myself.
Practice makes perfect, so keep it up!
You will improve in no time.

For3v3r_Lost
Vice Captain


Grummlie

Lunatic

PostPosted: Wed Aug 13, 2008 12:17 am


I like it. ^^
PostPosted: Thu Aug 14, 2008 4:57 pm


I read half o' it but from just that little insert, I dub it cool.. nice job.

UltimatePranksterTK

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