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| si senor |
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 Posted: Wed Sep 07, 2005 11:08 pm
Hey folks! I'm an a*****e. Seriously. I'm a real jerk. For example, I cheated on my girlfriend, told her about it, waited several days, then said I wasn't leaving her. I left her two weeks later. Another example: there was a cricket chirping nonstop at work yesterday and today, and it was in a crack in the cement so I couldn't stomp it. I grabbed a can of oven cleaner and completely filled the crack. The cricket jumped out, so I sprayed oven cleaner at it until it was completely buried under a thick white blanket of highly corrosive foam. Still need more examples? My little brother once said something about wanting to become better at drawing, and I replied with something along the lines of "all your hopes and dreams will come to nothing. Your life is going nowhere. You are a complete failure, and will never experience a single fulfilling day on earth". This weekend, my cousin wouldn't stop talking so I stiffarmed him in the throat, wrestled him to the ground, and then pushed my thumbs into his eyes until they popped and felt like bad rasperry jam. And then there was the time I flew a TNT-loaded helicopter into an orphanage. Actually, those last two didn't really happen. But the rest did, and that was just in the course of three weeks!
Anyways, to get to the point, if you're stuck in a pickle and don't really know what to do in any situation at all, just come here and explain the predicament to me. I'll figure something out that's sure to work in one way or another. Basically, I'm also stealing that silly idea that's already been stolen. Know why? BECAUSE I'M AN a*****e. DEAL WITH IT.
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Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2005 10:05 am
Hey Mr. a*****e, I have been working on a way to fold time and space so that I can travel faster then the speed of light, without the time disorienting effects of hyper-space. While I know it is great for whoever is going into hyper-space, the universe ages around them at an excellerated rate, making visiting new worlds and coming back to earth hard since your family is... well, dead. Anyhow, I have been trying to create a vacume with which to, more or less, bend reality at 500X the speed of light, thus cutting out the time lag, but I can't manifest a power source large enough to power such a device. What should I do?
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 9:36 pm
Will you ever come back to the ******** guild?
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 9:37 pm
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 9:44 pm
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 10:23 pm
Please.
I flip off a box of kittens every morning for breakfast.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 10:25 pm
Yngwie Please. I flip off a box of kittens every morning for breakfast.
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Posted: Tue Sep 27, 2005 11:32 am
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2005 9:09 pm
 I'm flipping this image off as hard as I can. My middle finger is actually causing me physical pain.
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2005 9:32 pm
Yngwie I'm flipping this image off as hard as I can. My middle finger is actually causing me physical pain. MEAL!!! *slides in the kitten's direction*
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Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 9:45 am
NO! scream Leave the kittens alone!
*baps Psiko with rolled up newspaper*
Go to your corner! stare
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Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 4:29 pm
*fences off psiko's corner*
ninja
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Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 4:31 pm
*gets trapped under the duct tape in maku's helmet*
>.<
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Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 5:32 pm
*runs off with the box of kittens*
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Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 8:16 pm
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