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 Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 5:54 pm
Ok, so today was our last day of school, now on summer break. Yesterday, I drew a picture for my lang arts teacher when I was bored at the end of class. Well, it was me in chibi form in a beautiful gothic lolita outfit. I signed it, "Have a nice Summer! ((signed smile ) Your only Gothic Lolita student." Anyways, he read it, looked at me and infront of the entire class said, "You know what lolita is, right?" I answered back, "I know lolita means little girl, and that it was the name of a rather crude novel written 30 or so years ago." He answered back, "It means a little girl who is trying to suduce an older man." Well, I explained it was a style and simply meant little girl, not little slut. His response was that the most common use of the word "lolita" in English is like the book. Well, I left school even more heart-broken, freaked out and depressed than I had been earlier! Then it hit me, I never thought about the novel much before. And, thus is exactly why so many people when I told them I was a "gothic lolita", gave me a rather disguested look or seemed offended, because now there was that association with me and the character in that book. Once, when I showed a picture of gothic-loli attire to an adult I told about it, she said "Oh my God! It is so girly and conservative!" - she was in shock. I had made an effort to dress in loli everyday for the last week of school, last night and this morning things felt so offbalance because of this, I simply dressed in normal (mostly goth/punk) attire. I guess because the entire reason I became a lolita in the first place was to escape the world of sex, lack of morality, vulgar language and such. Do any of you guys have similar experiences, or became a loli for similar reasons?
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2008 11:08 am
I haven't worn much Lolita clothing, but I love to draw it, and I love the fashion for its conservative look. It doesn't try to show skin and it isn't meant to show off yourself to the opposite sex. I love that about Lolita.
BUT, I'm also reading Lolita by Mr. Nabokov. The fashion and lifestyle of Lolita is SO SEVERELY DIFFERENT from the novel that it surprises me. Unfortunately, most people would only know the novel. But be patient and explain that it's a fashion from Japan that emphasizes non-flirtatious or sexy looks and a polite demeanor.
I'm sorry about what happened to you at school. emotion_hug Did you explain to them the meaning of the fashion as best as you could?
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Posted: Tue May 27, 2008 1:27 pm
I tried, thanks for the hug -hugs back-. I think I will copy a few pages out of the gothic lolita bible and give them to him next year sweatdrop as well as shorten it by just calling it "gothic loli" better safe than sorry ^^;
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Posted: Thu May 29, 2008 8:56 am
Why don't you just call it Japanese fashion? I think that sounds a lot better than "goth loli" but thats just my opinion.
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Posted: Sun Jun 01, 2008 2:27 pm
Say it's both Japanese fashion and "goth loli". Try to have them understand. smile
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Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 2:30 pm
^^ good idea (sorry it took so long to respond)
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Posted: Fri Jun 13, 2008 9:22 pm
Even here in Japan, when I talk to other foreigners about Lolita - I say "L-Fashion" or I just refer to the bridge spanning between Harajuku and Yoyogi Koen. >>
I personally think it was entirely inappropriate for your teacher to say that to you in front of other people. Entirely.
Grrr that just urks me xD
Anyway, I did join in on Lolita for similar reasons. It's different, beautiful, elegant (of course) and it's just a fun style for when I feel like being a bit feminine than usual. I'm also tired of all the sex-seeking styles out there, and Lolita is a nice change of pace.
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Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:34 pm
Makes since, also considering loli was most popular a few years ago, and is starting to go back to being mainly a more under-ground style as it is gaining popularity else where in the world.
Thank you! And thank you self-control ^^;
Again, thank you 3nodding you can't even watch regular tv anymore without seeing something sex-related or inapproperate, it is really sad. Same with all the comedy movies. A few days ago I went to see "Don't Mess With the Zohan" with my boyfriend, he worked really hard all week to get money for that and we havn't been able to see each other that much this summer. Anyways, we wen't to see it. I didn't laugh once, it was disgusting and demoralizing... and seeing for some reason he was laughing, paid for it and there was no way to get home (and he was gonna leave for camp soon then I leave for camp a few days after he gets back) must say never before did I realize there was that much self-control in my little crazy mind. It was the same when I went to see "Made of Honor", all very sad, very sad indeed.
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Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 9:44 am
when telling people what it is I mostly say its kind-of neo vitorian . But Im sorry you had such a bad experience , I remember spending an hour explaining to my boyfreinds father that we were not going to an orgy and it was just a style , and nothing really like the stupid old book. (not that the book was all that bad the reference is just annoying).
I like saying neo-victorian because people dont think of sex much when thinking victorian ( in fact women were told to have kids and stop having sex) and showing you ankles was being a slut , in those days. In fact I mostly got into loli because I love victorian but wanted more frills and so forth. Stupid people will always be there , we just have to educate them.
dont be sad we love you here.
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Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 10:21 am
^^; oh no dear, I'm not so much anymore. Anyways, I am very sorry for your experience, that must of been rather odd having to explain that to your boyfriend's father. It is kind of funny when you think about how totally different the book and the style are... but your right, if we just take the time to educate people about the style, things will get much better 3nodding the style lolita is much much more than just the word, it is something we all admire here and love really, not so much as a title but as a being itself ^^
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Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:01 am
I have to say I started to wear, and mostly make, Lolita fashion because I liked the fact tha it wasn't about how much skin you showed off, which you have to be skinny as hell for, but for how you felt in it. I rather hate westerner fashion and even when I wear it I usually layer my clothes. I found that I felt more comfortable in Lolita and more myself wearing it. I think the worse time I ever had of it was with my mother who freaked when I was telling her about it. She didn't understand the words coming out of my mouth so when I finally got to show it to her she was surprised and agreed to to buy me a whole outfit once I get to my goal weight! Way to go mother! (Now just to talk her out of getting some for herself....)
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Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 9:01 pm
I'm so glad I joined this forum! I never get to talk to anybody else about the Lolita fashion like I do here. I'm nervous about the looks I'll get. But anyway, I'm SO glad I'm here. Lolita is a unique fashion, and I love it. smile
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Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 8:47 am
^^ The guild is a lovely place. Really, it all depends on how you represent yourself by behavior and the way your outfit is put together.
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