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 Posted: Wed May 07, 2008 7:23 pm
well so here are some of my poems and yeah they mat be depressing but hey.......
My life has gone to peices
My life is not worth living it
I wish the pain would go away
I want the voices in my head to go away
They tell me not to do it
But i dont listen
It feeels so good
Seeing the blood
It makes me happy for awhile
Then I’m back to the depression
That presses down on you
Makes you go crazy
And won’t go away
The voices yell at me for what I did
I don’t care I’ll just do it again and again
So this is the last time I will see the scars
I will hear the voices no more
I will cut this last time
I Neal on the floor
Cut my wrist
And watch the blood stream out
I smile at the feeling that comes over me
The feeling of blood loss
I sink to the floor
In a puddle of my own blood
Never to get up no anymore
What happened to this world?
What happened to the peace?
Why must we fight?
Why must good people die for no good reason?
Other than the reason nobody try’s to stop it?
How can people get away with there crimes?
How can all of this happen?
Why do we have all this war and hate?
Why do people starve because of greed?
What is wrong with kindness?
What is wrong with caring?
What is wrong with giving?
What is wrong with showing that you’re willing to help?
What happened to this world?
What happened to the peace?
Why must we have al this greed and hate?
Why do we do nothing to help?
And if we do how come we get shot down others?
Why do we feel the need to hurt people?
What is wrong with us people?
What makes us go so mad?
What makes people go to the extremes?
Just to make a simple point?
What happened to the peace?
What happened to care?
And I'll ask you my friend what happened to this world?
Life is like a rose,
It is beautiful,
But it had thorns to bring you down.
Cherish all of the small moments,
They may seem insignificant to you,
But to someone else that’s everything to them.
The little things, that’s what people will remember you by.
Things like your laugh, your smile, your personality,
The funny things you did or said.
So let life be life.
Even when you get our lows in life,
Don’t forget that you will get the high points too,
Also that you have people that would do anything for you.
Also never forget ho you are doing let life blind you on who you are.
You are the person always trying to make everyone feel better
You are the person always looking for the best of every situation.
No matter what the situation you will always find the silver lining.
So don’t you ever forget that?
Life is life and,
Life is like a rose it is beautiful,
But it has thorns too.
That life was not fair
It wasn't fair that I was the one being abused
It wasn't fair that you didn't let me have a life
But you let your daughter go anywhere and everywhere
If I did that I would go through hell and back for it
It wasn't fair that I was treated so different
She can leave and get away with just a note I cannot
She can go to the dances I cannot
She can go have a life,
While imp being your Cinderella
She gets the attention while I’m in the background.
While i clean the house from top to bottom and bottom to top again
She’s hanging out with her friends
When she runs away she gets grounded for a month
When I tried I got grounded for 3 and was threatened and shoved in walls
According to you she could do no wrong
We would get in to fights
I’d get yelled and hit slammed into wall dragged by my haiR
So id takes the punishment for something I didn’t do
While I was doing that she was out having a good old' time
But I was being you Cinderella
That wasn't fair that you could do that to me
It wasn’t fair that I was your stress reliever
It wasn’t fair that the only day I was allowed any fun was at get-togethers
In the house that I cleaned
It wasn’t fair the way I got out of the situation
The way you used my Dad
The way you turned my shattered world upside down
And then you expect me to be nice and friendly
When I have to be in the same room
I hope you have as much trouble in your life as possible
I hope it is hell for you
So you know the feeling of what my life was
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Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 11:52 am
I like your first one...Maybe not the topic, but you're a good writer. ^^ Some things I caught in the first one...if you want to edit, are: kannazs I will cut this last time I Neal on the floor Cut my wrist "Neal" is spelled "kneel" kannazs In a puddle of my own blood Never to get up no anymore ... ^^;; In your second one, the thing I especially like about it is your last line and how your repetition emphasizes what you're trying to express. Tres bien. ^^ The third is well written...but...you started out with a rose being a metaphor to life, so were you trying to have the whole poem relate to it metaphorically, or was it just an intro and outro? It confused me a bit. "Also never forget ho you are doing let life blind you on who you are." ...What exactly do you mean by this line? ^^;;? Otherwise, I don't have much to add. Aw, the last one is sad, but written nicely again. I didn't see much that could use fixing. ^^ Good job, I think you're a good at poems. They are a little dark, like you said, but they make good topics to write about. Kudos.
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 3:19 pm
grayangel2992 I like your first one...Maybe not the topic, but you're a good writer. ^^ Some things I caught in the first one...if you want to edit, are: kannazs I will cut this last time I Neal on the floor Cut my wrist "Neal" is spelled "kneel" kannazs In a puddle of my own blood Never to get up no anymore ... ^^;; In your second one, the thing I especially like about it is your last line and how your repetition emphasizes what you're trying to express. Tres bien. ^^ The third is well written...but...you started out with a rose being a metaphor to life, so were you trying to have the whole poem relate to it metaphorically, or was it just an intro and outro? It confused me a bit. "Also never forget ho you are doing let life blind you on who you are." ...What exactly do you mean by this line? ^^;;? Otherwise, I don't have much to add. Aw, the last one is sad, but written nicely again. I didn't see much that could use fixing. ^^ Good job, I think you're a good at poems. They are a little dark, like you said, but they make good topics to write about. Kudos. well the first one was me in my not so happy days. The second one poems pretty much explaines eveything. Me just really flusterated(sp?) And the third one i dont really know the whole rose thing it just came out when i as writing sorry about that xp And the line was supose to say "Also never forget who you are and let life be life and let it helpyou define who you are" sorry never really finished the line and didn't realize it sweatdrop the last was me venting alot of stuff about my past
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 3:21 pm
and this is my one and only rhyming poem.
I woke up to the sound of rain,
Plink-plunk it sounds against the window pane,
I throw the cover to the floor,
Quick get dressed and run out the door.
The rain is pouring down hard,
But I just run into the back yard,
Jumping in the puddles of water and mud,
And smile at the fun,
I jump twirl and twist,
Fore I got my wish,
Just one day of rain,
So I could play in the rain,
And be so oblivious to the cold,
Told that I would catch a cold, but do I ever do what I am told?
But they shouldn’t mind,
Fore when everybody shall hide,
I shall be the one franking around,
And laugh when I fall to the ground,
And if I get hurt I don’t feel the pain,
Because I get to play in the rain,
People may think I may be insane, crazy, and senile,
But I won’t go in to denial,
I maybe all of those,
But do they know the joy of being soaked head to toe,
No the don’t ,
They tell me to go in but I wont,
Because I got to play in the rain,
The poring rain,
When it stops,
I stand there and pout,
Fore the rain is gone
Gone, gone gone.
So I tread back in soaked,
My family looks at me shocked,
But I just shrug,
And stop on the rug,
I sit on the floor and take off my shoes and socks,
And say well at least I don’t also QUACK like the ducks,
I get up and turn and grab a towel with a wish,
For another day to play in the rain.
i know a few lines dont work but i think i did pretty good.
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